You might check out The SDMB Anti-Vampire Weapon Development Guild and How would you go after a vampire? No kiddin’—some good stuff in those.
Recently, I’ve been musing over the possibilities of using photoflash bombs as an anti-vampire weapon. Of course, experiments would be needed to determine if a 500,000,000 candlepower flash alone would be enough to harm a vampire, or if you’d need to somehow shift the light into the Ultraviolet spectrum to do the trick.
Photographic materials use Silver as a component. Processing film/paper produces a nasty black fluid, that contains lots of Silver in suspension.
Spray the stuff. From backpack sprayers, & crop dusters. Spray every graveyard & crypt in town, need it or not, just like spraying for roaches.
Also, take collodial Silver suppliments, thus making your blood toxic to the Undead.
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My plan was to eat a shit ton of garlic, making my blood taste ass-nasty. Also, I want to surically imbed a small splinter of wood in my heart,. The second I turn into a vamp, BANM, I’m dead.
In a TORG game I was playing in, my highly pious PC’s Test of Will scored high enough to cause a hideously powerful vampire to take just one backwards step… right into the Ark of the Covenant.
Whereupon I hid behind something solid and did. not. even. think. of watching what happened next. :eek:
When did silver become a weapon against vampires? I thought that was for werewolves.
Holy hand grenade.
Yeah, I was going to ask that, too. It’s important to keep this stuff straight.
Many myths/stories/legends/made up stuff in random TV/books/movies have silver as being useful against vamps. Silver is often thought of as a pure metal in folklore, so it would make sense that it could hurt something as perverted as a vampire, or werewolf.
Well, to go with an SF version, how’s about a garlic needler?
The standard needler of SF fame takes a lump of metal and kicks shards off of it to be accellerated at insane speeds to put itsy-bitsy, but lethal, holes in the target. If one cools anything far enough - it becomes brittle enough that even a non-metal could be made to make shards that would be hard enough to punch through un-living matter. So… I envision a device one puts a bulb of elephant garlic into, which then freezes the garlic to, say, 100 K, and when the trigger is pressed shoots out slivers of that at the target.
I leave the design of the refrigeration and accelleration units (and the miniaturization of such) to more literal minded geeks than I.
You fellas have given me a nasty idea… How would Friend Computer and the loyal Troubleshooters deal with a vampire in the RPG Paranoia? Wood is a product of Outside, the details of which are not available at your clearance level, Citizen.
I’d go with tacnuke shells.
A big crucifix tattoo on the chest and a bear hug.
From the John Steakly book Vampire$; the blessing of the Pope. There’s a cute scene where a vampire tries to kill the “sleeping” Pope - who reaches up, touches him on the forehead and says “Bless you, my son”. Fwoosh ! The vampire goes up in flames.
You might want to be sure it will work first. This is serious stuff.
Very important point, carnivorousplant. I’ll have to find some [del]suckers[/del] I mean volunteers to test the efficacy of elephant garlic for me, first.
For that matter, holy water is a product of a secret society. (Or several of them) Not precisely something you’d want to risk trying to acquire. And do not let Friend Computer even get a whiff that one might want something other than good, pure Computer-recycled water. That might indicate anti-social, or even Commie tendencies. Perhaps you should come and spend a few time units explaining why you’re not satisfied with Friend Computer’s water, Citizen.
Garlic, and other spices, is not used in proper footvat yeast. As such it could also be only found Outside. Further information is not available at your clearance level, Citizen. For that matter, just how did you come to know of the existence of such items, Citizen?
Silver is known, but used only in vital, Computer-related equipment. Not to be entrusted to mere Troubleshooters, don’chaknow. After all, we can always get more Troubleshooters, but if something were to happen to Friend Computer… Why it would be utter chaos!
Did you say something, citizen?
Good. I thought not.
Go on your way.
Oh, and don’t worry, The Computer is sure there’s no such thing as vampires. And we both know you wouldn’t want to doubt Friend Computer. 
“Ha ha ha…but you have to have faith for that to work, Mr Vincent!”
That’s why we Nice Jewish Boys carry a BFG. ;j
You probably wouldn’t even have to wait for it.
Okay, they are, after all, like, called “the living dead.”
It would be a real bummer to be a vampire. Imortality after a fashion. Wealth accruded over time. Women. Even a creep like Bela Lugosi had them crawling all over him. And not being able to use the drive through.
Yeah, it would suck. :rolleyes:
It just occurred to me: Why don’t vampire hunters douse themselves with holy water before going into battle?
Well, I think, in part it would depend upon the beliefs of the hunter. I mean, why would a dyed-in-the-wool athiest think saying mumbo-jumbo over water would help? Or would the Calvinist hunter really want to risk damnation by using the tools of the Papacy?