I’ve just found myself pondering, well, myself. I’ve just realised that while I can simultaneously walk into a room and remark to myself the attractiveness of both male and female parties, I can’t for the life of me be sexually attracted to both men and women at the same time. I can’t explain it. The feeling changes like the flick of a switch but it acts just like a switch so that it’s one or the other. Thinking about it I think it has something to do with a strong sense of duty to monogamy I feel so I subconciously choose one and only one.
So the question, I guess, is: Is this the same for you?
If it is or is not, do you have any reasons in your head why?
Nope. I never lose my attraction to women so, by default, any time I find a guy attractive, I like both at the same time. If something is beautiful, I appreciate it.
Do you mean sexual attraction? What you’re saying sounds a lot like what I said here:
Oh boy how do I put this without sounding derogatory. I always find both men and women attractive but when I’m in the mood (so to speak ) I will either desire one or the other but not both.
example:
Hot naked girl in front of me. I want the hot naked girl.
Hot naked guy in front of me. I want the hot naked guy.
Both in front of me. At this precise moment I’d want the hot naked guy but still look at the girl and think “Wow!” In five minutes or so it might be vice versa
I have moods in which I want men or women. When faced with the hypothetical hot naked girl and guy, right now, I’d want the guy. I think it has something to do with hormones. (supposed fertile times, that kind of thing) Tomorrow, next week, whenever, I might want the girl. I have only been attracted to both a man and a woman at the same time once in my life. I also feel a strong sense of duty to monogamy (interesting way of putting it) which could have something to do with it.
This really only holds when I am single and available, however. When I am in a relationship, I generally want my SO all the time.
I did misread your original post, hence the ambiguity, but would still post the same thing here. I am always sexually attracted to women but not always to guys. If, during one of my spells where I was feeling especially attracted to males, I was presented with a naked and willing partner of each gender, I’d probably still pick the girl if both were not an option.
If it were though, I’d gladly have menage a trois as I am very interested in having a a MMF threesome, but not an MFF.
Hope that makes sense. I’m out of it today and I’m not feeling especially lucid.
I am more attracted to men than women, usually. I do go through phases of being attracted to one more than the other, though. For awhile there I was a full-on lesbian, but slowly got more and more back into guys.
I can appreciate female beauty, but I just want to have sex with Ardred, so I think that throws me off a little.
There is a term for a bisexual individual who will have a relationship with a woman, then one with a man, then with a woman, etc. That sounds like it is not specifically what you’re talking about but in that general ballpark.
Unfortunately, I don’t remember the term, as it was introduced to me among a list more than a month ago. I would suggest going to your local college/university GSA/Pride Alliance/whatever else it might be called and asking them about the various types of bisexuals.
For myself, the only time it has mattered I was attracted to both people. I’ll keep things PG-13 (or at least distinctly not R) and stop there;)
Don’t want this thread to become too TMI right off.
As a matter of fact, I am attracted to three people right now. Two men, one woman. The woman and one of the men are not quite available, but the other man is. One out of three isn’t bad.
I may be one of those bisexuals who is attracted to one sex and then the other. At least that is how my attraction patterns go much of the time. Actual relationships are a different story.
I can be attracted to both at the same time (which isn’t necessarily to say that I’d want to have sex with both at the same time - that’s a whole different concept, in my book). I suppose I’d be the most attracted to whichever one I found the most attractive, if that makes sense, and whether that would be the man or the woman would depend on the individuals in question.
I definitely can and have been attracted to both men and women at the same time, to the point where I can’t imagine it being any other way.
The closest comparison I can make to not feeling that way is when I’m in the mood for something on the rough side. Having never had a woman dominate me, wanting that sort of play almost always leads me to think about men exclusively.
I think I see where the OP is coming from. I’m not really interested in threesomes, so I don’t usually find myself thinking about sex with men and women at the same time. It’s generally one or the other. When it comes to <ahem> sexual fantasies, I usually go through periods where I’m interested in one gender or the other for a couple weeks, then switch back.
I’ve never dated a guy, but when I’m dating a woman, I don’t usually find myself fantasizing about men much at all. 'Course, I’ve seldom managed to date any one woman for more than a couple weeks, so I don’t know how a relationship would affect my normal “pattern.”
This would be correct in my case as well. I think it is entirely up to the individuals in question, and not their gender. If I’m in a room with a bunch of hot guys and no attractive girls, I’m going to be more attracted to the guys. Same if vice versa. I’d imagine it’s the same with heterosexuals; you’d only lust after those people that you find hot. So I guess I can find both guys and girls attractive at once.
I am monogamous by nature, though, so there’s no problem with limiting the attraction. I don’t really think about/have interest in threesomes, either, when I’m fantasizing I tend to focus on one gender at a time.
What are you saying here? I’m exclusively hetero, but I’m pretty aesthetically attuned and aware of whether someone (man or women) is “attractive” ie “good looking”. Are you concerned that being able to appreciate male beauty makes you potentially bisexual? Or are you saying that you are bisexual, but only one way at a time?
) I will either desire one or the other but not both.