[QUOTE=Terrifel]
If I ever embrace the darkness totally, I now have a sure-fire moneymaking venture: a Jesus safari.
[/QUOTE]
I wanna be your business partner! 
I’m seriously thinking about offering guided tours to search for Steve Fossett. Who knows? Maybe someone will find him! Buy myself a new Hummer (probably get a steal on one, now), a fleet of dirtbikes and write them Sumbitchs off!
[QUOTE=Wile E]
It just looks like one of those hokey old gorilla suits. Did they check for a zipper?
[/QUOTE]
That’s what I was thinking. They didn’t even try.
If they found it in Georgia, why is it being displayed at a hotel in California?
Bigfoot sure has nice dentalwork.
The DNA results are in – apparently, bigfoot is part man, part possum. Me, I’m just surprised anything came from this at all…
[QUOTE=Half Man Half Wit]
The DNA results are in – apparently, bigfoot is part man, part possum. Me, I’m just surprised anything came from this at all…
[/QUOTE]
Also part human and part inconclusive. The inconclusive part is what they are claiming is bigfoot DNA.
[QUOTE=Half Man Half Wit]
The DNA results are in – apparently, bigfoot is part man, part possum.
[/QUOTE]
Looks like the sample was contaminated while the “scientist” was preparing dinner.
[QUOTE=Terrifel]
Stuff like this makes me want to curse my parents for condemning me to a life of poverty by teaching me right from wrong. Meanwhile there are guys out there making good money by taking people on Bigfoot expeditions.
[/QUOTE]
Is it that they taught you right from wrong? Or did they simply fail to teach you how to lie cheerfully to people while you fleece them for all you can get? 
[QUOTE=OtakuLoki]
Is it that they taught you right from wrong? Or did they simply fail to teach you how to lie cheerfully to people while you fleece them for all you can get?
[/QUOTE]
Oh no, I can do that well enough. I work in a haunted house attraction at Halloween, so I feel fairly confident about my ability to lie cheerfully for money. As long as they don’t actually believe my lies, it’s all good. I freely attribute my finely honed extemporaneous bullshitting ability to years of loving tutelage from Dad.
The hell of it is, I am just as certain that I could do much better by giving myself over to blithe amorality. Quite by accident, I once convinced a college acquaintance that I had genuine psychic powers by performing a few simple mentalist tricks from a Penn & Teller book. Even long after the gimmick had been explained, he was unwilling to let go of the notion that I had some secret ‘gift.’ Billy was far from the sharpest knife in the drawer, but still: there’s a lot of his ilk out there, is what I’m saying. I have no doubt that I could persuade him to wait in the woods for Bigfoot to walk by.
[QUOTE=Half Man Half Wit]
The DNA results are in – apparently, bigfoot is part man, part possum.
[/QUOTE]
A human-possum hybrid?
Well, no wonder they found it in Georgia.
[QUOTE=Terrifel]
A human-possum hybrid?
Well, no wonder they found it in Georgia.
[/QUOTE]
A 1960’s-vintage limerick:
A hillbilly farmer named Hollis
Used 'possums and snail for his solace.
The offspring had scales
And prehensile tails,
And voted for Governor Wallace.
[QUOTE=vetbridge]
Tell me. . .why do people involved with Bigfoot, UFOs, etc all own/use pieceofshit cameras? Or do they own stateoftheart cameras that have a “blurry” setting?
[/QUOTE]
Take a look at the Most Recent Downloads page on FLICKR. Apparently, it’s easier than I thought it was to take blurry, poorly lit pictures with automatic digital cameras.
I think, maybe, that some camera have an embedded feature that blurs the picture when the subject is two people in a night club mashing their faces together and holding up foo-foo drinks or making hand gestures.
Maybe that’s the problem. Bigfoot always has a foo-foo drink in his/her hand.
[QUOTE=Half Man Half Wit]
The DNA results are in – apparently, bigfoot is part man, part possum.
[/QUOTE]
Maybe it’s Half Man Half Biscuit.
[QUOTE=Half Man Half Wit]
The DNA results are in – apparently, bigfoot is part man, part possum. Me, I’m just surprised anything came from this at all…
[/QUOTE]
Well, the skeptics will sure be embarrassed when it turns out that the “dead” Bigfoot was only faking!
[QUOTE=appleciders]
If they found it in Georgia, why is it being displayed at a hotel in California?
[/QUOTE]
Because he can check out any time he likes, but he can never leave.
[QUOTE=Johnny L.A.]
Maybe it’s Half Man Half Biscuit.
[/QUOTE]
Perhaps it would make a good Wedding Present?
[QUOTE=Johnny L.A.]
Maybe it’s Half Man Half Biscuit.
[/QUOTE]
I sure hope I’m not the only one who’s thinking that someone needs to get the people behind these Cake Wrecks to try a whack at this?
96% possum, but 4% Loch Ness Monster!
Turns out the latest bigfoot is a rubber gorilla suit in a block of ice.
[QUOTE=Boyo Jim]
Turns out the latest bigfoot is a rubber gorilla suit in a block of ice.
[/QUOTE]
The cop was fired from his job over it, which makes me think there is still a little bit of justice in the world.
Since there is another Bigsuit thread that was (until just now) getting more recent activity than this one, I’m locking this thread.
And remember, KEEP WATCHING THE… Savannahs?