It’s uncanny, they are like will-o-the wisps, like UFOs. Something about the combination of this style and size of T-Shirt ensures that it will disappear from the catalog of any store approximately a year after I start buying them there. The latest victim was JC Penney, which until this fall offered a sturdy, humble cotton T-shirt, sans decoration, sans pocket, in a modest range of colors from St. John’s Bay. Now they are gone, and I have to go find another store that offers this type of shirt, and I’m frankly getting tired of playing this game every year or so.
I honestly don’t think that my criteria are all that outrageous. I can’t help it: I am an oddly shaped person, with a midsection that is extra-stretched out, somehow.
Regular T-shirts don’t fit me well, yet the XL sizes are too wide and hang on me like a tent. I need a T-shirt that is a bit longer than normal, to cover up my weirdly elongated carcass. The Large Tall size category works fine for me.
If that were all there were to it, I guess things would be simpler for me, but I have two additional insanities that complicate matters. I don’t like having a pocket on my T-shirt. I don’t ever use it, and I don’t like it. It annoys me. Ditto for any sort of decoration, trademark emblem or sports logo on my shirts. These huge corporations aren’t paying me to advertise for them, and I don’t feel the need to wear clothing with unfunny catchphrases to draw attention to myself.
So, in summary: T-Shirts in LT size–can sometimes be found at the Big and Tall Men’s shops, provided you don’t mind pockets or sports logos. Note to the Big and Tall stores: XL isn’t really an ideal substitute for LT.
T-Shirts without pockets–they’re everywhere, but they all have logos or stupid sayings on them.
T-Shirts without logos or stupid sayings–very common. But they all have pockets.
Why is it that a straightforward, ordinary, no-pocket solid color T-shirt is almost impossible to attain, to say nothing of finding one in an unusual size like LT? What was the problem, St. John’s Bay? Was there really so much demand for the T-shirts with pockets, or in the cheesy faux-'70’s two-color style that you are offering now, that you just couldn’t afford to keep the plain old solid color T-shirts on your product line? Well, you and your JC Penney overlords can just go ahead and bite me.
Anyway…in conclusion, if during the post-holiday sale season, anyone happens to notice a store offering some nice plain, solid color cotton T-shirts (size LT), could you take a second to post the information here, please. I’d be extremely appreciative. Thank you.