I’ve got such a great idea!
I think Barney should brawl with Big Bird on pay-per-view! Who wouldn’t shell out the greenbacks to see that?
Who would win?
Big Bird is a city bird, and I suspect he may have a hidden dark side. Maybe he’s strapped under those golden feathers, or is the type who would shank a dude on the subway for looking at him the wrong way.
On the other hand, Barney seems to have the weight and reach advantage.
Also, what would the rules be?
Should Big Bird be permitted to “beak” Barney in the solar plexus?
Should Barney be allowed to invite a ferocious, slobbering horde of preschoolers with red Kool-Aid stains on their upper lips, who would rush into the ring and gangpluck Big Bird until he resembled a huge, flailing oven stuffer roaster?
Sure, there are details to work out, but I can say one thing for sure:
Put this spectacle on pay tv and it will reap profits in excess of the damages from the “unauthorized use of likeness” lawsuit that would surely follow.
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I’m not a verbal information transfer agent, but I play one on tv