Go ahead, the giver isn’t a poster and won’t read this. They clearly didn’t put any thought into your present, they’re not likely to look here for your rant. Get it off your chest.
I got socks. A dozen pair of socks. And a toenail clipper.
The wish list was ignored, and apparently so were the two drawers full of socks I already have.
What will you be returning today?
If you return the toenail clipper, you’re going to need those new socks sooner or later.
I have one in each bathroom and one in my bedside table.
My gifts weren’t shitty per se- technically they’re very generous. But since I’m currently unemployed, my wife’s family has been giving us financial support. For which I am grateful, but it’s been a long time since I’ve gotten anything fun.
Maybe you should consider changing your username. 
Can I have the socks then? I’m always running out of the little bastards. I’m convinced dryer lint is the cremated remains of my socks.
I wasn’t the recipient, but my sister in law gave my mother in law a 10 by 7 picture of herself with her fiancé; a 10 by 7 picture of herself; and a 10 by 7 picture of just the fiancé. Why? Where in the house do you hang a gigantic picture of your future son in law?
Well I got all kinds of nice things, but I did not get the two things I asked for:
A dozen pair of socks
A toenail clipper
My boyfriend gave me - I am not making this up- a two-ply roll of toilet paper. That shitty enough for ya?! 
Obviously it was just a joke. We have a long standing playful argument about his displeasure at the subpar 1 ply toilet paper that I keep in my house, whereas his royal arse deserves, nay demands a quilted variety with multiple plies.
One year my cousin sent me a set of kitchen towels / oven mitts in the most ugly ass, country style pattern I’ve ever seen. I know he could not possibly for a second have thought that was anywhere near my taste (or anyone’s for that matter) and the worst part was he sent it FedEx signature required, so I had to actually drive to pick the crap up.
The dog wasn’t aware that it was Christmas. Also he had already spent his allowance. So I got no shitty gifts!
SWMBO and I could have done quite nicely without the disease and pestilence that we got. She’s been sick for the last three days and now I’m starting to cough.
Thanks a whole fuckin’ bunch, Santa, ya fat bastard.
I kind of wish people would ignore my wish list. I started an Amazon list several years ago, with the fully-explained-many-times intention that it would be a general guideline to the sort of thing I’d like, not an explicit list of the exact, precise items for which I will accept no substitute. The first year it was sort of treated that way, then it somehow became the explicit list of things for which no substitutes will be accepted. Then it somehow became my responsibility to figure out what people wanted to buy me and how much they wanted to spend and put suitable items on my list. Last year, about the only person who didn’t buy me things off the Amazon list or my Woolery registry was the aunt who doesn’t have internet access. And most of them gloat about how fast and easy it is to just pull up my list, make a couple of clicks, and be done with me.
It feels stupid and assholish to complain that people buy you things you want and picked out, but…well, it just sucks every single ounce of fun out of the whole process. People used to spend some time thinking about me and what I might like, and there were some far left field misses, but more often I got things I had no idea I wanted until I opened them. I loved the anticipation and the excitement of being surprised, and even when the gift was a total miss, I could usually see and appreciate the train of thought behind it. This…well, I might as well just buy the stuff myself and submit them each an invoice, ya know?
Sounds like people think you have nasty feet. Maybe you should take the hint.
My yougest daughter gave me a drawing of a horse when I expressly had wished for a Lamborghini. Goddamn slacker kids nowadays.
Can I complain about a gift I gave? My sister asked for two video games, so I gave them to her, and then I found out her daughter bought her the exact same things. Grmph.
About 15 years ago my husband got me knock-off version of a popular men’s cologne. I get hives and don’t even wear women’s cologne.
He’s gotten much better. This year he got me the latest Kindle Fire.
My mum was true to form, giving me clothing in random sizes. One pair of size 10 pjs and a pair of size 14 underpants. She never keeps receipts and usually claims she can’t remember where she bought them so they’ll probably end up where they always do: the charity shop.
And yet a few years ago when I asked her to make a donation to charity for my birthday, she cracked it because she wanted to give something to me. 
I received a handmade sweater that looks like it was made by either a child or a disabled person. The relative who knitted the sweater is in fact a 30-something adult who has been knitting for nearly a decade. I’m not sure if she’s so lacking in talent that this is sincerely the best she could do or if she simply didn’t try very hard. I’m inclined to believe the latter, as I saw the sweater she made for another member of the family and it looks much better than the one she made for me.
I’m not a knitter myself so I don’t know the right terminology to describe this sweater, but it’s done in such a large, loose stitch that it’s effectively see-through. There are tails of yarn several inches long sticking out all over it. The hem, sleeves, and neck are finished off in a strange manner that I’ve never seen before, and clumsily at that, with big gaps and loops hanging down. There are also large gaps where the front and back are joined, and where the sleeves are joined to the body. This is made more obvious by the use of a completely different color of yarn for only the upper front part of the sweater. I assume this was an attempt at following the colorblock trend, but it looks like she just ran out of yarn and switched to something else.
I really don’t know what to do with this thing. I will never wear it, and it’s so ineptly made that I feel like it would be insulting to even give it to charity. I guess I could unravel it and give the yarn to someone else – it looks like it’s on the verge of unraveling itself already.
This is totally worth it just for the story. I bet you’ve gotten more pleasure out of this story than you ever would have out of an appropriate gift of the same value.
My sister gave me a sweater. It’s sort of like a blanket with sleeves. It swallows me up and since it is in an animal print, I’m afraid to wear it. Some of these hunters out here are going to mistake me for a damn mountain lion. Plus it’s just really ugly.
But I love her anyway.