You’re right, it isn’t directly my business. But, late use of a pacifier can cause problems with dental development, and shows a parent who will always cave in to the child’s demands. You do not have to jump every time the child makes a noise. From personal experience, kids that I have known that used pacifiers late tend to end up being spoiled brats.
“The large print givith, and the small print taketh away.”
Tom Waites, “Step Right Up”
I saw a kid breastfeed once who was old enough to tell you he thought the milk tasted good. His mom had just never stopped breastfeeding him.
This feels wrong to me, but I can’t explain why.
Your Quadell
It feels wrong to you because you grew up in America, and considering our screwed up attitudes about sex and nudity, it probably IS wrong because of the weirdness it generates in a room when it’s going on.
It creeps me out completely, myself.
HOWEVER…were we more of the hunter-gatherer society were were long ago, it would be no biggie.
All depends on context.
Stoidela
Boycott shampoo! Demand REAL poo!
About the 3 year olds and pacifiers debate. This use to irk me to no end. Then I had a child and entered the secret society called Parenthood. I started noticing that some children are higher needs children and have to comfort themselves. My son never took a pacifier, even though he rarely cried (only at bed time) there were a few times I could have duct taped anything there to help him thru a bad teething episode. Now just think of it in another light, none of these kids will start kindergarten with their pacifier.
My parenting pet peeve is people who do not wipe their kids runny snotty noses. Gawd, it gives me the willies just thinking about it. That or Parents who have no backbone with their children.
I totally agree with melin, but I’m a guy. I love to touch and play with them.Sure, Breasts are used for feeding babies, but they also serve a more sexual purpose.
Show me a genius, and I’ll show you a man who can’t put his own pants on.
LukeBreasts’ functions are:
a) sexual
b) nutritional
c) all of the above
The answer is c. They’re fabulous things! You see, the men are attracted to them sexually, so that reproduction can occur.
During pregnancy, the milk glands ramp up to prepare to feed the baby.
Just before labor, a breast can be stimulated which causes the body to produce oxytocin, which can trigger labor.
Just after the baby is born, it suckles the breast which continues to produce oxytocin, which causes the uterus to contract and recover back to its original form. Also during this time the breasts produce colostrum, a yellowish, sticky fluid that does a great job of clearing out the newborn’s digestive tract. (Newborns are full of “meconium”, which is a tar-like poo.)
Three to four days after that, the milk comes in! Time for junior to chow down.
I just think it’s fascinating that breasts do so many things. Lets settle this argument once and for all: they’re for sex AND they’re for babies and the two are NOT mutually exclusive!
OK… Here’s something I still don’t understand, and perhaps I’m weird, but here goes:
Why the breast double standard?
I mean, why is it legal for men to go around topless, and women not to? This is not me saying I want to look at more women’s breast: Honestly, breasts aren’t that exciting to me one way or another. It can’t be because they’re sexually receptive organs: Trust me, my nipples are as sensitive as any woman’s, so I don’t see why I can expose them but a woman can’t. Especially when breastfeeding. I mean, good god, they’re MAMMARY GLANDS. That’s what they’re for!
Jason R Remy
“Open mindedness is not the same thing as empty mindedness.”
– John Dewey Democracy and Education (1916)
You got me, Jayron. But last weekend at Woodstock, I can tell you this:
The standard slipped . . . tremendously.
Isn’t it New York where women can ride the subway topless? It would be nice in the summertime–and just think, an allover (almost) tan! Of course, like I need more comments from men passing by: “Ooo, momma, I love to watch them bounce!” (and that while I was dressed for work!) Maybe men would calm down about breasts a bit if they weren’t hidden all the time.
“Eppur, si muove!” - Galileo Galilei
I’m certain they would.
While we were recently at Woodstock, I asked my husband if he was enjoying the “booby show”. (There were lots of girls with their tops off.) He said “Y’know, when it’s presented that matter-of-factly, it stops being naughty or even all that interesting.”
Also, while vacationing in the south of France, my lil’ sis went topless at the beach (just like all the locals). SHe said you could spot the American boys a mile away, 'cause they were the only ones gawking. The French boys didn’t give a damn.
Leslie, this is so true! (re: topless beaches in Europe) I was stationed in Sicily in the '80s and my friends and found that Sicilians were totally cool about topless sunbathing. It was considered gauche to even look. Of course, the American sailors practically tripped over their tongues on their first visits… My experience was that the American guys who were stationed in Sicily and who came to the beach regularly eventually got with the program and stopped bugging their eyes… They finally realized what the protocal was, and didn’t want to seem like unsophisticated rubes, I guess. The funny thing was, OFF the beach most Sicilian guys were a menace to an American gal dressed for the street – If I took a walk in shorts and a tank top I’d collect a group of heckling Sicilians in no time at all.
Jess
Full of 'satiable curtiosity
Hey all-
Some of you know me from the SDMB & misc.facts groups- I rarely get over here since I had the baby 
I’m currently nursing my first baby, Ian- 4 months old. There was never a question in my mind about formula feeding- ever.
Nursing in public has been a sore spot for us since Ian decided he’d prefer to stand while eating. I tried it a couple times, but he is so tall- and I’m so short- that it doesn’t work anywhere but in a reclining chair, with me sitting on a cushion (he stands between my legs). So, he gets a bottle of EBM in public.
Nursing him in public at a friend’s home is possible- I just bring my boppy pillow to sit on 
Anyhow…I’ve just found this thread, and wanted to comment on some of the points raised by previous posters:
—Kellibelli wrote, "…it is such a complete expression of love to feed one’s child with the milk your body creates…to look down at the adoring face of your baby…it is really hard to discribe. "
That is exactly how I feel! That little “milk grin” and the eye contact/closeness is unmatched. Is it any wonder that nature designed mammalian babies to be so “cute” that their mothers (source of milk) wouldn’t abandon them?
—PTVroman wrote,“What I do have a problem with are the radicals. When Chris was in his bassenett in the hospital, there was a little card on it, with his name, birth date, statistics, etc. It also had a drawing of a woman whipping her tit out, and the largest letters on the card said “I’m a BREASTFED BABY”. Do we need to advertise that much?”
Yes, “we” do. And here’s why they’ve had to become “radicals:” You see, some nurses pop a pacifier/bottle of formula or sugar water in a baby’s mouth at the first sign of a fuss. It’s habit with some, but is slowly changing. It causes “nipple confusion” in nursing babies, and leads to disastrous results. It sabotages their BEST start in life, and causes much stress to the nursing pair. Even very vocal nursing moms have caught nurses stuffing artificial nipples into their babies’ mouths because they “didn’t want to disturb the resting mother.” There are “100% Breastfed” t-shirts for newborns, too. And stickers. And hats…you get the picture
Basically, it is a big problem in most hospitals in the U.S. Why? Because only 30% of new mothers nurse their infants, and companies like Mead-Johnson push their liquid crap on new mothers via the nurses. They get some nice incentives to do so. As do pediatricians. (but that’s another debate)
When my son was born, I was the only mother (out of 8) who was nursing. Considering the prestige of the Cambridge, MA hospital, I was shocked when they tried to push the formula on me, “just so you can get some rest.” Bullshit! I kept that baby with me every second (AMA- I might add)! There was NO way I was going to let him go into that nursery, knowing he’d be sucking rubber the second he made a peep!
So… complain all you want about those cards- but if they help just a small percentage of babies/mothers get their nursing relationship off on the right foot- then they did their job.
—PTVroman also writes, "Then, while in the hospital, we received literature from the LaLeche League (sp?). I aggree that breast milk is the best thing a baby can have, and you should breast feed them as long as possible, but they suggest 4 years. "
La Leche League International answers the question of “How long should I breastfeed?” with: As long as the mother and the baby wish to breastfeed.
The American Academy of Pediatrics currently recommends breastfeeding for at least the baby’s first year. The World Health Organization recommends 2 years. I’d think you were exaggerating a bit about that literature you read- but I know that all LLL chapters have different recommendations. 4 years is a bit extreme- the few nursing moms I know of who BF for that long only do it once or twice a day- a “comfort” thing for the child, not a “nutrition” concern. Visit www.promom.org for the most complete breastfeeding advice. Good luck with the new baby!
Quadell: “Contrary to popular belief, breastfeeding is what breasts are actually for (since they serve no real sexual function).”
What? Get out of town. Personally I don’t care much where breastfeeding is done, however, though it isn’t a sexual act it is definately an intimate one and as such its best to take into consideration what most of the people around you think of it. I’m not a big fan of breast-feeding all over the place, though this is mainly because of the unfounded but none the less correct assumption that anybody breastfeeding in an obviously improper place like a restaurant or the front row of the theater is doing it to attract attention and make a point. Bah humbug.
It only hurts when I laugh.
“Obviously improper place like a restaurant or front row of a theatre”
What’s so obviously improper about it? Perhaps the mother feeding her child is completely indifferent to what you or anyone else thinks and is simply feeding her child and doesn’t see the need to “remove” herself from your sight?
Bah humbug on you…on all of you who view it as something that should be hidden. How ridiculous. I’ve never had children, and I never shall, but you can bet your bottom dollar that if I did, I’d breast feed, and I wouldn’t give a rats ass what anybody thought if my kid was hungry. I also wouldn’t deny myself the pleasure of whatever I was doing just because YOU have hangups.
Speak for yourself. Personally, I just get annoyed when my breasts are played with. 
>^,^<
“Cluemobile? You’ve got a pickup…”
OpalCat’s site: http://fathom.org/opalcat
The Teeming Millions Homepage: fathom.org/teemingmillions
My 2 cents, if I may. My sister has two children- breastfed both of them. I can clearly remember one day at her house- she had some friends over, including a guy friend we both have known forever. This guy is extremely shy/modest. Right in the middle of a conversation with him, she pulls up her blouse, opens her bra (exposing her breast) and starts feeding her baby. Didn’t bother me a bit, but I’ll never forget the look on his face- it was clear he just wanted to crawl away- fast. He was embarassed by the sight of her lifting her shirt and exposing her breast. He wasn’t a jerk or an idiot- he wasn’t against breastfeeding. He was just plain embarrassed. I’m not saying you shouldn’t breastfeed in public- I’m just saying that some people are just uncomfortable with it, like my friend. When I asked her why she couldn’t have excused herself for a few minutes to feed (after seeing his obvious discomfort) she took a snotty attitude of “that’s his problem”. Obviously it is his problem, but she could have been more descreet. This was not someone she normally would have shown her breasts to, and he was caught off guard, that’s all.
I hope I can revisit this subject when I become a mom…I plan to breastfeed and will be interested to see how I feel then…
If at first you don’t succeed, redefine success.
My 2 cents, if I may. My sister has two children- breastfed both of them. I can clearly remember one day at her house- she had some friends over, including a guy friend we both have known forever. This guy is extremely shy/modest. Right in the middle of a conversation with him, she pulls up her blouse, opens her bra (exposing her breast) and starts feeding her baby. Didn’t bother me a bit, but I’ll never forget the look on his face- it was clear he just wanted to crawl away- fast. He was embarassed by the sight of her lifting her shirt and exposing her breast. He wasn’t a jerk or an idiot- he wasn’t against breastfeeding. He was just plain embarrassed. I’m not saying you shouldn’t breastfeed in public- I’m just saying that some people are just uncomfortable with it, like my friend. When I asked her why she couldn’t have excused herself for a few minutes to feed (after seeing his obvious discomfort) she took a snotty attitude of “that’s his problem”. Obviously it is his problem, but she could have been more descreet. This was not someone she normally would have shown her breasts to, and he was caught off guard, that’s all.
I hope I can revisit this subject when I become a mom…I plan to breastfeed and will be interested to see how I feel then…
If at first you don’t succeed, redefine success.
I think a woman ought to be allowed to breast feed anywhere she would be able to bottle feed.
Frankly, I have never seen a woman “whip out a titty” like some of you are describing here. The vast majority of the time, I can’t even tell a woman is breastfeeding her child when I glance at them.
I breastfed both of my children. The trick to discretion is to lift up or unbutton your shirt from the bottom. If you pop one out of the top, you will definitely expose a great deal of breast, to the point where many people will feel uncomfortable.
It’s silly, in this society of ours that places extreme sexual import on the breast, to suddenly expect a large part of the population to turn off the feelings they have been conditioned to have. “Oh, that’s his problem” is just rude.
I don’t think women should have to excuse themselves to feed their babies. They certainly don’t to feed the baby a bottle. Again, discretion is the better part of valor. And if the woman is feeding the baby and you can’t really see anything then kwitcherbitchin and leave the mommy in peace.
My mom breastfeed all her children as did most of her friends. I therefore have no problem with a women publicly nursing. But just like any other new skill you should practice it before going out in public. Here’s a good site if anyone in interested in nursing protocal.
Oh no my code is showing! See what I mean about practicing before trying it in public?