butterfingers on a knife man.

In the past several weeks at work I have:

  1. Dropped a USMC combat knife on the webbing between my thumb and first finger, slashing it open.
  2. Electrocuted myself trying to adjust a flourescent light bulb.
  3. Gotten my thumb caught in the scissor sharpener, grinding away a large (right-angled) bit of flesh.
  4. Dropped a samurai sword and, with my finely tuned reflex action, tried to catch it, carving two fine gashes in one finger and entirely cutting out one section of flesh.
  5. Burned myself on a super-heated knife edge, fresh off the sharpener for too long.

Should I get a new job? As a pillow salesman or something? Or would i damage myself inhaling fluff?

Yeah, either that or you’d suffocate yourself with the pillows. Sounds nicer n’ bleeding to death though!

Be careful.

I’d consider a new job, or begin to wear kevlar gloves everywhere you go…

Just try to keep the bigger blades away from your throat or wrists.

Is your name Tim Taylor maybe?
Grunt Grunt
Toool ouch!
I would start going to church if I was you… you might need a few prayers…


Bit of advice…,

If you do cut off a finger in a knifing incident, don’t try to end the pain by shooting your skull full a nails with a pneumatic nail gun. I would go with searing the stub with a hot poker and moving on.

May I assume you know some guy in PA did just that?

as to the OP, get those chainmail butcher gloves.

Yes you may assume just that. I keep thinking that if I were that guy I would have looked into a different strategy after, say nail 7 or 8.

But that’s just me.