They couldn’t call it a sex “drive” if it weren’t at least as fundamental to human existence as piloting an automobile. 
But they had friends who were willing to attend the fundraiser… Couldn’t they have asked those same friends for a loan or help, without throwing the party?
My opinion is that throwing the party IS tacky, as well as people throwing fundraising parties for themselves. Not to mention they had to put some money out at first, to host the party. They’ve could’ve saved that money and asked their friends for less money.
Yeah, this makes more sense to me, too. From talking to others, a lot of people’s reaction is that because abortion is something that women have been made to feel ashamed about, it’s a good thing to have such a party/be able to take pleasure. I guess I can’t help thinking that even though I don’t judge a woman who has an abortion, I do judge someone who’d want to take pleasure in it. It’s one thing to ask for money for an abortion but celebrating it? I really hate to sound like I am implying that all women should feel bad about their abortions, but can’t there be some decorum, even if you yourself don’t think it’s a bad thing?
If you’re seriously concerned about pregnancy, you learn exactly what the drug/condom makers mean when they talk about “perfect use.” Ideally, you’d do this before you insert tab A into slot B.
We don’t know that. And from the tone of the article, it sounds like both Maggie and her boyfriend were both horribly uncomfortable with the whole thing. Reading it again, it almost sounds like Maggie’s friends foisted the idea of an abortion party on her in some sort of show of “empowerment.”
All of which are tacky and would get similar judgment from the people here. I know, it’s easier to think that we’re being judgmental of Maggie and her boyfriend because we think she’s a dirty whore, or that she should feel like shit about having an abortion, but maybe that’s not it. Maybe it really is that we think fundraising parties are tacky to begin with, with an added twist that intimate medical procedures are highly personal, and making them public, especially for money, compounds the tackiness tenfold. That really could be all there is to everyone’s feeling that this party was an icky idea.
Rubystreak, that’s some bullshit, and you know it.
I believe that you personally, and maybe a few others (Dangerosa springs to mind), are mostly put off by the tackiness of fundraising parties in general. But even the most cursory reading of this thread makes it pretty clear that the fact that it was for an abortion is the central issue for plenty of people, and I strongly suspect that a thread about someone having this exact same party to raise money for either their root canal or their rent wouldn’t provoke four pages worth of ire, let alone the sort of venom released in here.
Of course not, an abortion is a tad bit more personal than a root canal or where the rent check comes from. Really, is it so hard to understand that while an abortion isn’t something to be ashamed of, it’s not something most people feel is appropriate to broadcast either?
I’m not interested in hearing about anyone’s root canal, either.
Until someone can explain to me why an abortion is **objectively **“private” and should be kept to yourself, while a root canal is not, we’re back to shame.
Objectively, there’s no difference. Throwing a party for yourself to raise money for something is a stupid thing to do. Period. And all major medical procedures should be kept discreet. Period.
But subjectively, some medical procedures, by definition, are more private than others. Say, those involving what kids refer to as “private parts.” You shouldn’t be broadcasting your abortion, you shouldn’t be broadcasting your circumcision, you shouldn’t be broadcasting your vasectomy and you shouldn’t be broadcasting your anal warts!
I ask again, why do you feel the need to make it about abortion (and the shame of it all) when dozens of people have told you that’s not it?
You know what else would have kept this party private? If Maggie had the balls to tell her journalist friend not to write about it.
Erm, your previous post indicates that you wouldn’t be so outraged if it weren’t about abortion. Now you’re saying it’s not about abortion. I’m going to need you to pick one.
Also, just for shits and giggles, are you familiar with the concept of a bris?
Missed the edit window.
I don’t really feel like arguing about this anymore, but I just want to say this: A thread about someone throwing this party to raise money to get their anal warts removed would certainly provoke (as it should, IMO) plenty of remarks of “tacky”, “TMI”, and “Ewwwwwwwwwwww”, but it would NOT provoke a whole bunch of posts about bad people celebrating their anal warts.
How about your sex change? Because throwing parties/concerts as fund raisers is becoming a very common way for some younger transsexuals to help cover the costs of their hormone therapy or surgery.
Yes, but the fact that one wishes to keep one’s own abortion (rent shortfall, anal warts, lymphoma, root canal, etc.) private does not mean that everyone else must be equally private about his/her own experience or condition.
Is it so wrong to view abortion differently, though? Can’t someone be pro-choice and not think it’s a good idea or inspirational for a woman to celebrate an abortion?
(Quote from Jezebel.)
I don’t think everyone should make women who get abortions feel bad. But is it so wrong to think that an abortion/unwanted pregnancy is a sad occasion and to be squicked out at someone feeling happy about it?
Bangs head against wall
This party didn’t “celebrate abortion” any more than a cancer fundraiser “celebrates cancer”. There was absolutely no evidence that the couple in question were “happy” about it.
And now I really am out, because I’m bored with repeating myself. I’ll leave this to people who aren’t.
Okay but even if this party didn’t, clearly the women at Jezebel think it’s not really a big deal for a party to do so. They say it’s nice that this woman got to do something “fun.” Do you see why people would read that and think that it’s in poor taste to do something fun on the eve of, what many would find, is something disheartening or even tragic?
Bad people? Who said anyone was a bad person? Please. Don’t put words in people’s mouths. No one is saying anyone is a dirty whore, no one is saying Maggie is a bad person for having an abortion (except that guy on the first page who thinks abortion is murder, of course). That’s confusing two issues: having an abortion, and publicizing it for money. You can feel fine about the former and very put off by the latter, simultaneously. Just as it’s totally OK to be fine and pleased about your abortion, it’s totally OK not to be 100% comfortable with people celebrating their abortions and fundraising for them.
What is the big problem here? Justin_Bailey has to turn in his Liberal Card because he’s not 100% OK with someone publicizing their abortion for cash? That’s too bad. You think it’s fine, doesn’t need to be private. He thinks it’s squicky to broadcast something that private. People form judgments and have their lines in different places. He’s not trying to force anyone to do it his way, just expressing his opinion that it bugs him. We don’t all have to be lockstep on this issue, do we?
Knowing what I know now, would I want this woman to have kids?
Hell no.
So, by that twisted bit of logic, I’m all for it.
College students broadcasting the fact that they have had sex? Now I’ve seen everything. Chances are most of the people who attended the party – of their own free will – had either had a pregnancy scare, had an abortion in the past or knew that it was a possibility in the future (having an abortion, or being confronted with the decision whether or not to have one – or a partner having one).
And AFAIK journalists don’t need to get permission to write about parties they’ve attended, especially when their entire article is written from their somewhat limited point of view.
The article talks about people dancing and laughing and drinking and having a good time. It also talked about Maggie and her boyfriend looking miserable. So you’re right, not everyone was having fun. Only the woman getting the abortion and her boyfriend weren’t happy.
Very true, but the article was written by one of Maggie’s friends. You’d think, if this friend was close enough to get an invite to an abortion party, they’d be close enough to check with Maggie before writing an article about her abortion and the fundraising party.