An office toilet was clogged, but a woman in that office really had to go, so she plunged it. She won a prize; a live 5-foot boa constrictor.
http://www.10news.com/news/boa-constrictor-slithers-out-of-toilet
If it was clogged, does that mean that someone else there blasted it with face-full of poo…? Also, how does a boa get itself wedged into a toilet?
“You sure took a long time…”
“'I don’t feel well. And, dammit, I Told you that garnish wasn’t caviar…”
Snakes: Another thing I can add to my list of reasons I hover when I do number two. 
That reminds me of a comic where a woman is about to sit on the toilet, and Mickey Rat is popping out of it saying ‘Hiya, baby!’
Lived in Texas and every few years a large toad would some how crawl up the toilet pipe and appear in the toilet, you’d hear it jumping and hiting the lid.
No one believes it, no idea how they were getting in the pipes.
The same toad each time?
I live in Texas now (not by choice) and if I go in there to pee in the middle of the night and a toad bites me on the butt I am ABSOLUTELY moving. In the middle of the night. I started to say “back to California” but I see that it’s boas there so never mind. Hawaii, here I come.
Shhh! Don’t tell her about Oahu centipedes.
In the rest of the country, we spell it “turd.” 
There’s a joke about living on Mexican Jumping Beans in there, too, but I’ll just move on.
Could be, actually. Back when we lived in toad country there was a big one that used to show up on our front porch, probably to eat bugs attracted by the porch light. I transferred it to the back yard a couple of times, which was a considerable distance all the way around our apartment building. The next morning it would be back on the porch. It got to be a game after a while–at least for me.
Doubt it but could be, I was just letting them go outside.
Do y’all remember my squirrel surprise about this time last year? I put screens over all of the vent pipes to prevent it from happening again. Maybe the snake went in after a squirrel.
story had it as a pet, whose owners were away, in another unit in the same building
So then did she still really have to go?
Well, if they could go outside, why did they need a toilet?
Sorry, this topic just spawns endless absurd thoughts.
Oddly enough, the reporters missed asking about that. The article does say “Up Next: Toilet Snake’s Origin Revealed!”
Of course it could just be how Home Depot offers local plumbers a contractor discount. Or how $90 an hour is reasonable when you want to snake the office toilet.
“Remember, don’t try this at home…!”
Still, I wouldn’t be surprised if she left a trail all the way out to the parking lot. Even if she did, it probably helped Animal Control capture the snake anyway.
“Just follow that long trail of spore. Try not to step in it though; you’ll track it back into the van…”
I just hope they don’t tag her with one of those vicious pet nick-names some offices give to co-workers.
“Betty Poop?”
“Too mean.”
“Morse Code Road?”
Still too much.
“Super-Soaker?”
“Closer. What else?”
“Peel-out spout? Turtle-hurdler? Mabel the Cable Fly? Peed Racer? Boa Consphincter? Plunge-drop-and-roll? Turdo-boost? Deuce Ventura? Bomba Dear? Miss Fiber 2015?”
“I’m not sure…”
“Brown Garter Snake? Its a shout out to Kill Bill.”
“Hmmmm…”
Someone tried to snake the pipe without getting the Straight Dope on how to do it first?
My SIL once found a rat in her toilet. A broken sewer pipe in the front yard was the entry point.
I was wondering where my trouser snake had gone; must have slipped out when I was doing my business!
