Bronx Man Finds 3 Foot Snake on Toilet Seat.
And then I bet he crapped his pants.
I love one of the comments:
“Well, that is definitely a cure for constipation.”
Kind of appropriate that it was a corn snake.
It was a “corn snake”? Waay TMI.
I’ve had it with these motherfucking snakes on these motherfucking toilet seats.
(There, I’m better now; we now return you to your regularly scheduled SDMB)
You might want to check this out:
Believe it or not, but it was in the paper.
Giant snake my ass. Now that anaconda, that’s a big one.
[Sir Mix-a-lot] My anaconda don’t want none unless you got buns, hon. [/Sir Mix-a-lot]
See, this is why the seat should be up, you need to look before you sit.
See! Everybody poops!
I don’t see the big deal. We’ve got three snakes in our bathroom (two of them corn snakes! 
)
Of course, they are in cages, not on the toilet seat, which kind of changes the dynamic of the whole thing. . .
Thanks. This (well, the original) remains one of my all-time favorite lines (top 20, at least :p). Someone was BOUND to go there.
I am not squeamish about snakes in general, just aware of which are poisonous and which not and I don’t like being surprised/snuck up on (by ANYTHING or one). :eek::mad:
If I SAW the thing BEFORE I went to squat, I’d respond with, “Wow, cool! Kids! Come see!” If not, I’d be stumbling and shrieking and likely give myself a concussion trying to “escape”. :o
Had one “sneak up” on me a few times…once in a friend’s house, she was showing me one of her lovely green tree snakes (the female) and meanwhile, the male had extended himself vertically from the tank across a few feet and was examining me closely about an inch from my face. Yes, I jumped and yelped.
Another one, a garden snake I rescued from a workplace (and eventually liberated into the wild), escaped the tank and we looked all over for it. As I paused in the dining room, where I had installed a large bunch of birch branches in the corner for decoration, I looked UP, and there it was…2 inches above my head, peering down at me. Gave me a start, I tell you. :eek:
Otherwise, I love snakes. 
p.s. heated toilet seat perhaps?
I don’t either. I can’t believe he called the police about this. Just either try to find its owner, keep it as a pet or let it go. What if it had been a puppy?
I also don’t buy this whole meme of animals coming up through the plumbing. More than likely someone’s pet escaped and it ended up there. Snakes are really good escape artists.
And corn snakes make beautiful, nice pets.
My ass, giant snake.
My giant snake-ass?
Snakes are nothing but trouble. I’ll never forget the time I stepped on a bike tire and it jumped into the creek and swam away. Also, my pet birds are snakes. The pet store owner didn’t tell me but the biology teacher clued me in. I wouldn’t have known because birds don’t rattle but I guess he’s right–one did fall into the can once.
It’s a toilet snake!!
[hides from flying vegetables]