Regarding the campfires…
Take a small bag of match-light charcoal. Put it in the fire ring, pile the wood on top and light the bag. It takes the same time as the careful-tending-with-kindling-and-blowing method, but you’re free to do other stuff while it gets going good. Instead of potholders, we carry a few sets of heavy workgloves in our camping gear. They work for hot pans, and also keep the rest of your hand protected when operating near the fire/grill/etc. With a small fire, you can simply reach in and position the wood as you like, rather than poking with a stick to move the logs.
Put your utensils in a small ($10) tackle box from Wally world. It keeps them out of the weather, bugs, etc., and also leaves the top tray for matches, lantern mantles, toothpicks, etc. It can be left on the picnic table (less tent clutter).
A small package of bungee cords (again from Walmart) can be invaluable. They work great for pinning your table cloth at each end to the picnic table (winds). Just assemble 2 or 3 of them in a suitably sized ring and it’ll usually stay the entire trip.
For handwashing, we keep a small bucket-rope-soap assembly in our vehicle. We put a bar of soap into the leg of old pantyhose and tie it to the bucket handle. Also a length of rope is tied there as well. When arriving at a campsite, we stretch the rope between two trees and loop the bucket end in such a way the bucket hangs about waist high. When filled with water you can wash your hands using the soap, then let it (soap) hang outside the bucket to dry. Used carefully, the water will last for days before it gets soapy enough to need replaced. A small dollop of Clorox will also add antiseptic if you wish. The rest of the rope can be used as a clothesline for towels etc. When finished, everything fits into the bucket and takes up very little space in the vehicle. This is very useful when you have limited water, or have to carry it to your site.