So, I’m relaxing and reading my Sunday Chicago Tribune. I find an intriguing article and begin reading. Since you need to be registered to read it, I’ll quote bits and pieces.
Here’s the headline:
Wow, sounds like a great story. Familial love, glory days of baseball, the ravages of old age.
The story begins with Julie Sollinger describing how much she loves her grandfather. Her grandfather played baseball for the Chicago Cubs for a few years in the 1940’s, but played in only 17 games. And he’s Julie’s hero. He left baseball and started a insurance/pension company and “made millions”. The story, correctly I might add, describes a fantastic man, who is, sadly, suffering from Alzheimers, now.
The story goes on about how he loved the game, and his wonderful granddaughter. He had some baseball cards made on his own and gave them out for free, because the makers of the cards wouldn’t have made them for a small-time player like himself. In response to his kindness and generosity, a sports memorabilia firm put him on a baseball card that was done in 1976-1977.
In an odd stroke of luck, Julie’s hubby was surfing the internet and found a place auctioning off one of the cards of her grandfather.
At this point, I figured, what a story. A wonderful man, baseball, doting daughter. Warm fuzzies all over.
Of course, you need a villian. Enter “unnamed collector” who had put the card up for auction. Julie, who so much loved her ailing grandfather, thought the card would make a wonderful, loving gift for her grandfather, so she bid on it. And bid on it… However, (insert sad music here), she was outbid.
Wow, how horrible. A veritable Shakespearian tragedy.
After the auction, she emails the buyer of the card with her story, weaving a tale of woe heretofore unknown, and asking him for the card. He replies that he is not interested in selling it. And with the determination of a lost puppy going cross country to find his home, she emails evil villian again, with an even more loving plea. She gets (GASP!) no response.
Julie says: “How could this person be so cruel? I mean this is probably just some stupid collector who wants this for a set.” and “Here’s the one thing my grandfather has never had of his own, and I can’t even get it for him.”
I can’t see you right now, gentle reader, but you are truly a hard-hearted bastard if you are not in tears over this story of love and loss. Nearly an entire page was devoted to this poor woman and her ruined dream.
I left out one fact, a fact that was made, surreptiously in the middle of the article.
The card was auctioned for $61 dollars.
Listen you stupid, self-obsessed, publicity seeking, moronic, pitiful waste of human flesh. If you wanted the card so bad, YOU SHOULD HAVE BOUGHT THE FUCKING CARD!!!. It was $61 FUCKING DOLLARS. You bid $15. You have a computer and can bid on ebay, but you can’t spend more than $61 dollars on your dream gift for your poor grandfather? And when you refuse to open your wallet (and I couldn’t help but notice the nice rock in your wedding ring, you shithead), you parade yourself to the paper and paint the guy who bought the card as an asshole. You even said: “I’d want somebody to print this guy’s address and just have everyone send him email telling him what a jerk he is.”
Well, FUCK YOU. I’d spam your fucking email with every kind of piece of crap I could find, you vindictive, pennypinching, piece of crap. My God you must have the balls of a blue whale in heat to pull this kind of shit. If I didn’t truly feel bad for your grandfather, I’d hunt you down and jam 62 dollars worth of pennies in your hypocritical mouth and wait while you painfully shit them out.
And a healthy FUCK YOU too to the Trib for their melodramatic, manipulative piece of shit article.