Canucks & liberal parents: your kid has a friend whose dad shoots guns

In My Humble Opinion
21

American, liberal, will never keep a gun in my house or allow anyone else in the house to keep one. I have depression, and I think there’s a good chance I might not be here now if my parents had had a gun when I was a teenager. I know depression runs in families, so if and when I have kids, I will probably be even more adamant- no guns in the house.

That said, I wouldn’t necessarily have a problem with my (hypothetical) kid having friends whose parents had guns in their houses. Assuming my kid doesn’t come home from their house talking about finding the gun lying around, or the kid playing with the gun unsupervised, or talking about the parent or the kid threatening to kill someone with the gun, or anything like that- that would be quite another story.

I wouldn’t like it if you offered to take my (hypothetical) kid along shooting or hunting without asking me first. If a parent doesn’t want their kid touching a gun until they are 18, that should be the parent’s right. Also, my religion (Judaism) frowns on hunting- animals killed by hunting are not kosher, and hunting for sport is prohibited in Judaism.

22

Very liberal Canadian checking in. The only problem I would see is that if the other parents are not informed to the gun storage regulations. I have my license for both restricted and non restricted guns (I have to for work) and I know that in Canada it would be impossible for a child to gain access to a gun, unless the keys to the lock up were in a place known to the child.

If a parent finds out and it becomes and issue just explain your safety measures and it should be fine. I can’t imagine how it would be an issue.

23

Where I live, most people hunt, so having a rifle and/or shotgun locked in a gun locker in a home is quite common.

I would only be uncomfortable if the person was a gun nut – someone with an arsenal, or with handguns, or with semi-automatic or fully automatic weapons, or regardless of guns was just plain bent.

24

My knee-jerk reaction is one of fear, knowing the statistics of shootings in the home with ‘unloaded’ and ‘locked’ guns, blahblahblah.

However, I’d have no problem with my children going over to play if you were to go over your safety precautions with me. Heck, I’d ask that of someone with a pool, too. :wink:

Don’t be afraid to talk about your hobby. It’s something that you love to do, and your enthusiasm will take the skeptics with you. You want to hear some serious hobby phobia? I keep over 20 tarantulas, and most people scream and run. It seems that 90% of people out there have arachnophobia. However, I’ve found that being upfront about my hobby, enthusiastic about the spiders, and throwing little facts in to discussion about how ‘gross’ and ‘terrifying’ my eight legged beasties are really brings people around.

25

I’m obviously way more of a farm kid than I thought I was. The very question strikes me as bizarre. When I was a kid, everyone had guns and they were very rarely locked away. We knew perfectly well that guns were Not To Be Messed With, and just didn’t, outside of actually using them in a responsible manner (like shooting at not-quite-empty spraypaint cans). :stuck_out_tongue:

26

Calgarian, never even seen a real-live-gun before.
At your son’s age, it wouldn’t bother me at all.
As they grow into teens, I might be a bit more concerned (who didn’t do a whole pile of stupid things their parents didn’t know about?) - but certainly not enough to forbid visits.
I would be pleased that you were being up-front about it, as well.

27

I would tell my kid that it would be okay to play with your kid, just not at your place. I would not think negatively of you, I just don’t want my kid anywhere near firearms.

28

Liberal American (resident) here. Not a parent.

If it were me, I’d think it was cool if you were into shooting as a sport. If you were into guns for home defense, not so much - I’d probably assume you kept one under your pillow or within easy reach somehow.

29

BTW, I’m a Canadian, and I support strong gun control.

Any given individual responsible gun owner is not a concern. Why I support gun control is that there are bad people out there who will obtain guns from smuggling or theft, including home break-ins. The more resonsible gun owners there are, the more guns will be stolen, leading to more innocent people being shot.

As far as people being shot goes, let face it, an auto or semi-auto in the wrong hands can kill more innocents in a short period than a similar gun that is not auto or semi-auto. At the same time, there is no reason for auto or semi-auto for hunting, or even a good reason for clips that hold more than a half dozen or so bullets. Therefore, I do not think that Canadians should be permitted to have auto or semi-auto guns.

As far as handguns go, they are next to useless for hunting, and they are far too easy to carry concealed, making them ideal for urban gang use. Aside from having them stored and used in ranges, I do not think that Canadians should be permitted to have them.

Note that although I have a very strong opinion on gun control, the issue is based on numbers – the more guns out there, the more guns that will come into criminal hands, and the more innocents will die. My opinion is not based on any assumption that a responsible gun owner will permit a child to shoot himself.

30

Canuck, liberal, mother, etc. I hate guns.

But as long as I knew they were properly stored it would be okay. Don’t hide you hobby, though. That alone would make me not trust you if I learned of it.

31

Canadian. Liberal. Uncle. Hate guns.

I’d be more upset that you lied to me. You said you went golfing (blah) and instead you went to Vegas to shoot guns (cool!).

I may not like guns, but as long as your come off as a competent person who uses them in their prescribed manner, I wouldn’t worry about it. Seriously, the deceit thing is far more troubling.

32

I wouldn’t care at all.

33

Do you think a gun owner has a responsibility to tell the parent of every kid that comes over, “Hey, by the way, we have guns”?

We have guns - a handgun and a rifle. It has never even occurred to me to inform the parents of any children staying here, any more than I would inform them that I have a soldering iron or a drill press or a second-floor hallway with a railing or a stove with exposed burners. Guns aren’t magical. Ours are locked up and unloaded. There are about a hundred ways a kid could hurt himself in our home (or any home) if he wanted to be irresponsible, but accidentally shooting himself with one of our guns would take batman powers.

Now, if I had a backyard swimming pool and we weren’t going to be home to supervise, I would inform the parents. Those are dangerous. And if we had a trampoline, I might insist on a liability waiver. :slight_smile:

34

Questionable, but if you spent a week(end) on a shooting course and claim it was a golf training course, you are crossing a line.

At some level, I think that kind of thinking promotes the gun-owner as boogeyman stance.

On the other hand, I’m American and not a parent, and while I’m not a gun user or comfortable with guns, I’m willing to trust you (generic gun-owning parent) in the abstract to minimize my child’s exposure to the guns (keep the guns from being an attractive nuisance).

The point someone made earlier about treating teens differently than children of six or so is worthy of more thought as well.

35

Well, there seems to be pretty strong consensus. And it’s pretty reassuring. My best take on summarizing it would be:

-so far no one would freak out.
-don’t lie, it’s more suspicious.
-be pro-active in disclosing with parents of any kids who come over, explain the storage precautions, and check if they have any concerns.
**
Crown Prince & Beanpod**, both of your perspectives seem entirely reasonable to me, and I would be totally at ease with such a reaction.

Cowgirl, thank you for posting that, I think it’s very fair minded of you.

howye, no nothing’s happened to me, chiefly because I’ve been very careful about whom I tell. It’s just that I’ve heard so many anecdotes of extreme reactions that it’s made me wary. Of course, the more extreme the reaction, the more likely it will be remembered & reported, so there is an inherent bias there, even before you factor in the NRA agenda. That’s why I wanted a reality check.

ShelliBean, the point you make about lying is well taken. It would bug me too; in fact, that is in large part what prompted me to start this thread.

Ginger and Leaffan, I was specifically hoping you two might chime in, as I knew you were both Canadian and enjoy reading your posts. I’d heard that about Calgarians before, but it seems there’s so few native Calgarians anymore, with the huge influx of people from other provinces. Doesn’t seem to have changed the voting patterns much, though, so perhaps it’s an influx of like-minded folks…

Hi kathmandu & spoike, you’re here too! I hope to meet you at our next Calgary dopefest. You’re probably right, I do tend to worry too much and overthink things. But it makes me a good planner. **spoike ** (Buffy fan?) ]there’s no reason to yell at you at all. Your honesty gives you credibility, and it’s what I asked for. You’re another voice indicating the wisdom of pro-active disclosure.

Anne Neville, for all three teenagers who have asked me to take them shooting, I have always gone to the parent first and let the parents make the decisions.

Muffin, just to clarify, in your perspective, would a person who shoots handguns competitively be a “gun nut”? BTW, there is a strong handgun hunting tradition in the states, particularly for wild boar. The only reason there is no handgun hunting in Canada is that it was made illegal.

the Lady, you make a good point about teens, one that I’ve thought a lot about, both from the thrill seeking side as well as the emotional swings side. I have fairly detailed plans on how to deal with the firearm aspect when we get there. Also nice to hear from another Calgary doper.

Folks, thanks so much for taking the time to respond. I think, based on this, that I will tell the other parents, as the opportunity or need presents itself. This includes disclosing pro-actively when kids come over. I won’t make a big deal about it, but I won’t lie anymore. Fortunately, the trip was a one time thing, and I can let it fade into the past.

36

I understand, Spezza, I don’t like lying. It was the fear of consequences on my son that motivated me, and even then it still felt bad. When it’s just about me, I’m open about it. We’ll see how it goes when I do tell people.

If you’re curious about it, PM me an email address, and I’ll send you a detailed account I’m writing for a Canadian gun board.

37

I get your point, but even if my guns are locked up, a visiting kid might see a bottle of gun cleaner, or a roll of targets, or some other bit of harmless paraphernalia that would let them find out, and then the parents find out from their kids after the fact. Now you might have a freaking out parent on your hands. I don’t think it’s a responsibility, but based on this thread, it seems like a wise move in managing reactions.

BTW, you’re absolutely right about pools & trampolines, iirc, drowning is the leading cause of non-driving childhood deaths, and trampolines were the single greatest cause of injuries requiring a trip to the emerg in kids in 2007, according to a radio piece I heard a while ago.

38

Another Calgarian with no kids here - I think you’ve gotten good advice here so far. One thing - if you aren’t doing anything wrong, stop acting like you are. :slight_smile: Talking openly about your gun shooting hobby will probably do a lot to dispel any fears.

39

Handguns for target competitions that are kept locked in the range and are only let out for transportation to other ranges? That’s a good sport and the risk of theft is reasonably mitigated. Nothing nutty about that at all.

Handguns for hunting? Not nutty, but something that I would not want to be made legal in Canada, for the more handguns legally out there, the more handguns will fall into the hands of bad people. Handguns for hunting are too easy to conceal, and by the nature of hunting are too difficult to keep contained to secure ranges and reasonable transportation – it’s in the nature of hunting here to go for days at a time. Since around here moose, deer, ducks and grouse (and bear for Americans – Canadians in my area tend not to be interested in trophy hunting) are what hunters go for, there is no great call for the use of handguns. When balancing the risks (growing numbers of murders by youth and young adults using handguns in our major cities) against the rewards (the possibility of using a handgun rather than a rifle or shotgun to shoot game), the risks are too great, in my opinion, to justify relaxing our fairly tight handgun regulations.

40

I find it hard to believe that trampolines beat stairs or sports for emergency room trips. Not that I think we should get rid of stairs or sports, it’s just that they are more common.

ETA: As for the people on gun boards posting about parents freaking out–they may well tend to be people that are already defensive or militant about their guns, and as such perhaps helped antagonize encounters.