Carrot Top gets the girls???

I must have accidentally slipped into some strange bizzarro dimension.

Last night I saw one of those 1-800-CALL-ATT commercials last night, involving that hideous apparition of pseudo-humanity known as “Carrot Top”. It also involved motorcycles and a racer.

In the end, Carrot Top walks off with two good looking women.

Strange dimension you folks got going here.

Either that, or those two women are now extremely wealthy, since I would assume that’s what it would take to get them to walk off with him and look happy about it.

<shudder>

I want to go home to my own dimension, please…

About 10-12 years ago, Rolling Stone had an article about Carrot Top. At the time he was the biggest draw on the comedians college circuit, and it was made fairly plain and clear in the article that Carrot Top did indeed get laid fairly regularly, usually with some semi-subile coed.

BogieBlanca, I remember reading that article.

At one point, the writer mention meeting up with Carrot Top as they are preparing to leave town the morning after a show. After saying goodbye to a female fan he has spent the night with, Top describes the girl as a “restraining order waiting to happen”. So he may even have stalkers.

The guy is in good shape from what I’ve seen, and colleges are full of co-eds and booze. I just want to know how many hungover women have woken up beside him in terror. “Oh My God! I screwed Carrot Top!” Because how do you live that down, or ever show your face again to people who find out?

Hell, even Tiny Tim was married three times, so why wouldn’t the Top get some action every now and then?

Excuse me, I have to go curl up in a corner and be really sad now…

I can’t tell you how relieved I am…I had heard, and had some incidental information, that he was Gay…

>>DMark shudders uncontrollably<<

…but speaking on behalf of Gay men everywhere, we are quite happy to put him back into the hetero pool.

I am sure millions of hetero ladies are all atwitter at this news.

Much as I hate the guy, I must confess:

If this were the kind of world where Carrot Top could never get laid, there would be a lot of us in big trouble.

If I ever need to make a collect call, I will NEVER use 1-800-CALLATT because of their spokesmen. I thought David Arquette was awful, but hate Carrot Top even more.

When this subject came up over on Fark (OK, I admit it, I look at Fark every so often), somebody claimed that one of his female friends had been in a threesome involving Carrot Top.

Now that is just wrong.

Carrot Top is very buffed out. He is wirey and muscular and has the red head appeal. He isn’t a hideous troll even though he acts one at times on stage. He is also pretty fucking hilarious in his stage act. I don’t think it is hard to imagine that he can pick up girls (or guys for that matter) whenever he wants. However, his schtick on the 1800 commercials gets old really fast and makes me change the channels.

Maybe he’s bi then. Some guys might find him cute when he has the “Wendy” pigtails going on.

If so, then all lifestyles can feel shame and nausea.

I just have to know - MMF or FFM?

Pretty sure it was FFM. I’m not searching through the Farkives for it, though.

I feel ill…

Calm down folks. Anyone who works on stage can get laid. It has nothing to do with looks or talent and not much to do with money–it’s a “be close to fame” thing. And the fame need not be more (or not much more) than playing in the local bar.

Mick Fleetwood, who must be one of the Top 10 homliest guys on planet Earth, was boffing Stevie Nicks for a while back in the 80’s (70’s?..back when she figured prominently in the dreams of 90% of men and 50% of women). And I have NO explanation for that.

So…get a stage gig!

Right, to second what dorkus… said, CT is actually kind of hot—from the neck down. I saw a photo of him the other day, with his shirt off? Dude is built. I was stunned.

That being said, I wouldn’t do him unless I were guaranteed that (a) I’d be able to put a bag over his head the whole time and (b) he wouldn’t do anything to remind me just how annoying I find him. Speak, for instance.

Yeah, but what’s up with the dude’s eyebrows?

http://www.carrottop.com/ct_pix/roadpics_8-11/Scott%20pointing.jpg

I felt the same way when Rosie O’Donnell declared her lesbianism.

That’s the closest we have got to seeing an alien lifeform.

I can see the appeal. He’s not unattractive. Nice body, bright eyes, and I think I’d find that shock of red hair attractive if I didn’t associate it with Carrot Top.

His personality is annoying and his voice is horrible and screechy, but I have to assume that at least some of that is a persona, a shtick, and that his real personality is at least somewhat toned down from there.

I wouldn’t sleep with him, but I think I’d go out with him-- once-- just out of curiosity.

That is just him making faces like Jim Carrie. When he isn’t cheesing for the camera he is decent looking. His stage personality is like an annoying cartoon but I doubt he is that way all of the time.