A short synopsis of the previous few seasons
Clark and Lana break up
589 people get knocked unconcious.
Clark and Lana get back together.
4,257 people go to the hospital
Clark and Lex are totally gay lovers.
Clark and Lana break up.
Clark loses his power 234 times
Clark gains his power back 234 times.
4,895,289 puns are made
15,289,273 inside jokes are dropped about capes, or flying, or “supermen” or men of steel.
Clark and Lana get back together (this time for realz, yo)
Lex and Clark are completely the gayest of gay lovers.
Clark and Lana break up.
Clark tells his secret to 15 people. 7 people die. 8 people get amnesia.
Clark and Lois seem interested in each other.
Lana fakes her death to get away from this god forsaken hellhole.
Lana says “just kidding! not really dead.” Clark and Lana get back together
I mean, imagine Liberace and Ru Paul’s lovechild doing it with the gimp guy from Pulp Fiction. Nowhere near as gay as the love between Clark and Lex.
Lana goes into a coma.
Lana wakes up from a coma.
Lex gets impaled by Clark’s long, rockhard icicle.
Clark, with no serious journalism experience and a single year of community college under his belt, manages to score a reporting job at the biggest newspaper in the tri-state area.
Clark and Lana break up. She freaks out like a ninja and like kills everyone in the town.
Clark and Lana get back together.
Clark learned 43 very important lessons about the use of his power, each of which contradicted at least one previous lesson.
Chloe gets ignored.
I think that about catches you up to the latest season.