This may be lengthy but I would really like to hear everybody’s answers and opinions on this, especially if you were a guy who grew up attending Catholic schools, although I do welcome anybody who wishes to offer some honest and provocative thought here. Okay so growing up in the 70s and eventually the 80s I went to Catholic school where I was taught that wakking off is a “mortal sin” (even the desire to wak off is a mortal sin) that sends said offender to Hell unless I go to confession. Okay, so back in those dark days of puberty I would get aroused very easily (I had some hot teachers back in 7th and 8th grade that would simply walk into the room…but that’s another thread). Anyhow I recall that I would go home and try NOT to succumb to my natural pubescent desires but to no avail. Okay so that week I would wak off as much as I could, hoping to get it all out of my system and then I would go to confession and promise “never to do it again.” (Yeah I was young and naive; weren’t we all?) Well of course the following week it would happen again and I would notice any number of the cute girls in my class or any of the cute girls in the classes above me or below, and I would repeat the cycle. So here’s where it gets strange: I remember trying to fantasize as often as I could before going to confession, and I would try to have as many fantasies about as many different people as I could because I sincerely wanted to stop doing this to avoid hell. So I finally get through all the cute girls and hot teachers at school and I’m thinking that I can finally stop when something bizarre happens: suddenly, the physically unattractive girls started looking desirable to me. No I would never have wanted to date any of them much less be seen with any of them (FYI—I was a fat ugly dork myself so please contain the hatred here okay? That’s an awkward age to begin with and I’m trying to make a point). So here are the questions for discussion on this thread: have any of you had these shared experiences when you were growing up? Did you suddenly find the plain to homely ones suddenly making you hot & horny when normally you never would have paid any attention to them? (FYI—I am NOT referring to the girls who lost weight over the summer or that I saw with a new hairdo or more flattering clothes on. I’m talking about no visible changes here whatsoever. I also was generally not attracted to their “personality” either. I’m talking about nothing more here than adolescent lust). Have you yourself ever lusted after & fantasized about physically unattractive people? Why do you think that is? What makes us suddenly desire people that have no physical or personal appeal to us whatsoever? (Note that I am NOT talking about the infamous “grudge fuck” either, which is also a topic for a different thread). I must admit, even today from time to time I will notice somebody that is not particularly good-looking but eventually something about her may arouse me. I would like some honest thoughts here without the judgments. Thanks for your input in advance.
I attended Catholic grade school (1st-8th) 76’-83’.
Honestly, the thing about waking off was never brought up or discussed by anyone. No teachers, no nuns, no priests, no parents. How would that topic even be brought up to a bunch of school age kids? I’m intersted in how it was even communicated to those who were taught this.
And in my recolection, going to confession you had to verbaly tell the priest what you were sorry for. (even at age 8 we were wise enough to come up with b.s. sins. “yes father, I was picking on my little sister again.”) Did you really tell a priest you were waking off?!
For the record, I believe the correct spelling is “whacking.” :o
No I confessed to “playing with myself” because that got the message across minus the vulgarity. With all due respect, since I attended grade school from 1969 through 1977 that was a much different time from when you attended. The way it was expressed to my class was this: “If you play with the impure parts of your body, that’s a sin of impurity and that’s a mortal sin. Just WANTING to do it is a sin.” “If you don’t respect your own body, how can you respect somebody else’s?” “You’re body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, so any acts that disrespect your body is disrespecting the temple of the Holy Spirit, and that’s a mortal sin.”
Okay…whacking. Now do you have any thoughts on the subject itself?
Since this seems to be some sort of poll/advice thread, I moved it to IMHO (from MPSIMS).
My only thought is general - human sexuality is strong, and it’s strongest in adolescent males. Trying to curtail it, it can manifest in unpredictable ways.
Can someone please go through that forest of okays and question marks and clean it up a bit? I can’t even figure out what exactly is the question.
And OP, are you interested in answers from people who went to Catholic Schools in the US exclusively, from a bigger group (other religious groups are equally strict when it comes to sex), only from men who went to boys-only Catholic Schools in the US…?
This thread reminds me of a t-shirt I once saw: “Every time you cry, the angels touch themselves.”
It pretty much boils down to
and
(i.e. Share your whacking experiences)
…I think I’ll refrain for the time being…
I think a large portion of it is probablly just the combination of adolescent hormones and the lack of mature understanding or experience that comes with that age. Although I can’t think of any examples now, I’m sure at the time I had my share of fantasies that would either do nothing for me now or make no sense.
Another angle you may not have considered is the “how possible is this to happen”. For example, fantasizing about a girl that’s maybe not at the top of the hotness pedestal would make her seem more attainable to you…and therefore provide a more believable/realistic fantasy.
As far as school goes, I went to Catholic grade school and high school in the 80’s and 90’s. As far as sex goes, the overwhelming attitude was that sex doesn’t exist at all…and when it does it is pretty much only for procreation. I never fully bought into that attitude, it makes no sense to me to deny basic human nature.
I have to wonder if maybe you have a latent interest or attraction or even fetish that you haven’t fully realized? Maybe you’re attracted to blondes but just haven’t fully developed that attraction (or whatever the common element is - green sweaters are hawt maybe?).
Perhaps this is the crucial inquiry:
I’m with you.
I was born in 1961, and got both the last of the old-school pre-Vatican II nuns before they retired AND the last of the young, liberal hippe folk-singing nuns before they quit (often to marry young liberal priests).
Contrary to what many people expect, I almost NEVER heard ANYTHING about sex, good or bad. I am aware that the Church regards masturbation as immoral, but I never heard anything about that during my school years.
In the same way, I am aware of Church teaching on birth control, but the subject NEVER came up in 13 years of Catholic education or in a single Sunday sermon. Hence, I’m not at all surprised that so many Catholics my age either don’t know that the Church opposes contraception or just never got the impression that it was important.
What about abortion? Once a year, usually around the anniverary of Roe Vs. Wade, most parishes I’ve belonged to had the priest read a dry, anti-abortion letter from the bishop. It always felt like a formality.
Non-Catholics often assume that Catholics of my generation were constantly bombarded with an-sex propaganda and hit with daily sexual guilt trips. In reality, we learned practically NOTHING about sex. at Church or in Catholic schools.
FWIW, I went to Catholic schools in the 50’s and 60’s, and except for one sex ed lecture and an occasional reference to “the sin of impurity” there wasn’t a lot of emphasis on sex.
As for who I did or din’t have lustful thoughts about, all my women teachers were nuns, very old or both. As for ugly girls. . .
The reason for the excessive details were to emphasize where I am coming from on this. What it boils down to is what some other posters said, in that I wonder if other guys ever desired women that had no physical or personal appeal to them whatsoever but for some reason we find ourselves having sexual fantasies about them anyway, and why does this occur. I am glad that I brought the details up, by the way, because I have to admit that where I grew up the Catholic schools and Archdiocese DID emphasize the “mortal sin” aspects of masturbation (and any other sexual sin for that matter) but I am seeing that apparently this is not as common elsewhere as I thought. By the way, I wrote earlier that I welcome anybody’s serious responses but I especially would like to hear from men who attended Catholic grade school to see if they had similar experiences to mine.
I was brought up a Catholic but did not attend parochial schools. I did not attend Sunday School, or many masses, beyond the age of 12. Somewhere along the way, I learned that masturbation was a sin. By the time I figured out how to get the plumbing to work, I had little interest in the church and a no-touching policy was just one reason why it didn’t make sense to me.
Kunilou’s movie quote pretty much sums it up for me. You want to know if men are normally turned on by unattractive women? Men are turned on by goats and chickens if unattractive women are not available. The world would still be using green screen monitors if it were not for the potential to see titties. Personally, I’m turned on by a thread title that combines the words “catholic” “school” and “fantasies”.
Rule 34: If it exists, somebody is turned on by it.
It’s not the details, it’s the writing. This is how you write a question:
[del] This may be lengthy but [/del]I would really like to hear everybody’s answers and opinions on this, especially if you were a guy who grew up attending Catholic schools, although I do welcome anybody who wishes to offer some honest and provocative thought here.
[del]Okay so [/del]growing up in the 70s and [del]eventually the[/del] 80s I went to Catholic school, where I was taught that whacking off is a “mortal sin” (even the desire to whack off is a mortal sin) that sends said offender to Hell unless I go to confession. [del]Okay, so back [/del]in those dark days of puberty I would get aroused very easily (I had some hot teachers back in 7th and 8th grade that would simply walk into the room…but that’s another thread). Anyhow I recall that I would go home and try NOT to succumb to my natural pubescent desires but to no avail. [del]Okay so [/del]that week I would whack off as much as I could, hoping to get it all out of my system, and then [del]I would [/del]go to confession and promise “never to do it again.” (Yeah I was young and naive; weren’t we all?)
Well of course the following week it would happen again and I would notice [del]any number of[/del] the cute girls in my[del] class or any of the cute girls in the classes above me or below[/del], and I would repeat the cycle. So here’s where it gets strange: I remember trying to fantasize as often as I could before going to confession, and I would try to have as many fantasies about as many different people as I could because I sincerely wanted to stop doing this to avoid hell. So I finally get through all the cute girls and hot teachers at school and I’m thinking that I can finally stop when something bizarre happens: suddenly, the physically unattractive girls started looking desirable to me. No, I would never have wanted to date any of them much less be seen with any of them (FYI—I was a fat ugly dork myself so please contain the hatred here, okay? That’s an awkward age to begin with and I’m trying to make a point). So here are the questions for discussion on this thread:
Have any of you had these shared experiences when you were growing up? Did you suddenly find the plain to homely ones suddenly making you hot & horny when normally you never would have paid any attention to them? (FYI—I am NOT referring to the girls who lost weight over the summer or that I saw with a new hairdo or more flattering clothes on. I’m talking about no visible changes here whatsoever. I also was generally not attracted to their “personality” either. I’m talking about nothing more here than adolescent lust).
Have you yourself ever lusted after & fantasized about physically unattractive people? Why do you think that is? What makes us suddenly desire people that have no physical or personal appeal to us whatsoever? (Note that I am NOT talking about the infamous “grudge fuck” either, which is also a topic for a different thread).
I must admit, even today from time to time I will notice somebody that is not particularly good-looking but eventually something about her may arouse me. I would like some honest thoughts here without the judgments. Thanks for your input in advance.
No, that’s how YOU write a question, Nametag. Hottius Maximus has his own style. He may have been manufactured in a different facility under different specifications.
Or he might be a human being, with his own unique personality and the ability to express it as he wishes. I found his post perfectly readable.
Check for updates to your operating system.
Thank you for your comments. I do have my own, shall we say, conversational style of writing. That being said, I do think that if what I asked was clear enough (although apparently to at least one poster, I wasn’t) then no big deal.