Cecil Adams = Punk Ass Bitch

[Ammonius_Saccus]

On the question of Santa, Mr. Adams has this to say:

Let’s just say his existence can’t be definitely ruled out.

So far so good. But let’s say how improbable it is. He then says:

A great many seemingly improbable events do in fact occur.

However, the list of things he lists is not in the league of improbability.

Besides, Fed Ex does it.

:rolleyes: Or, no they don’t.

we can’t deny that a larger purpose is at work and that we are in the service of an agency greater than ourselves.

Any evidence that that is actually the case?

The giving of gifts in such a way that no credit will devolve upon ourselves is sufficiently at odds with our routine behavior as to be accounted a mystery, and we may as well give that mystery a name.

People do all kinds of things for their kids not seeking credit. This behavior is not that out of the normal and does not need magic to exlain it.

A certain class of persons, of whom your columnist is one, will go through their lives attempting to extinguish these foolish hopes. No doubt in the main it is good that we do so. But even the sternest among us remembers the wonder we felt as children to think there was a force having a kindly interest in us that wasn’t bound by the rules of this drab world. Wherefore if there’s someone who’s going to say flat out that Santa Claus doesn’t exist, it’s not going to be me.

Here is where Mr. Adams shows himself to be a punk ass bitch. He knows that belief in magic is a foolish thing, but he is just too much a pussy to call it like it is here.

What, were you afraid newspapers would drop you if you said there was no Santa?

Try calling like it is everytime. Not just when you feel like it, bitch. Let the facts be your guide.
http://www.straightdope.com/classics/santaclaus.html

[GIGObuster]

Hey, Merry Fucking Christmas!

[Glassy]

I think Cecil himself said it best, in response to another question:

There is this thing called a “joke” that you should become acquainted with. A joke is a display of cleverness intended to engender yux. Some people, however, require advance notice if they’re to recognize a joke when they see one. In polite society it’s customary when in the presence of such people to signal the onset of a joke by means of some subtle stratagem, such as a siren, large firecracker, or gong. Clearly your so-called friends could stand a lesson in thoughtfulness.

[Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor]

Should we start a betting pool on
A) Whether this guy lasts 15 minutes
or
B) Whether this guy ever posts a second time.

I can’t decide.

[Quiddity_Glomfuster]

Apparently the truly dedicated troll (is that ok here? Did I see a post about that? It seems to not be on top now.) escalates arguments until it succeeds in being banned. I suppose someplace there’s a forum where such individuals claim bragging rights for the lifetime total of bannings.

[hajario]

@Bosda Di'Chi of Tricor

Should we start a betting pool on
A) Whether this guy lasts 15 minutes
or
B) Whether this guy ever posts a second time.

He’s been here for two weeks. He’s already posted over 100 times.

As for the OP, what a trollish, lame ass, unfunny pile of crap.

[Bryan_Ekers]

And he is outta here!

Trollus expellus.