Friend of mine is on track towards losing a hundred pounds. He’s close to 80% there, and is jubilant … except that his goal reward has lost much of the flavor (HA!) and as a way of helping him towards that goal, I want to think up some other incentives.
His intended reward this whole time has been to buy nice shirts, and possibly an actual full suit, from a fancy-schmancy men’s clothier … and I’m sure he will, eventually … but what’s the fun in buying nice looking clothing nobody will see?
Yeah, yeah, delayed gratification. But he’s dieting/exercising his way towards losing almost as much as I weigh, and delayed gratification is literally the name of that game. I wanna help brainstorm some fun rewards he can have NOW (or whenever goal weight is achieved) and social distancing and working from home and all that jazz is really wrecking the usual rewards systems.
I know he wanted to show up at work one day, and instead of the now-baggy shirts he was just going to quietly rock one of these awesome nicely fitted ones.
I’m a chick; I get it. Hit a good healthy pattern, move towards looking better and better but hold off on buying anything new until you can finally wear that one thing you always wanted but couldn’t have.
But christ, what’s the fun in all that and then wearing it in your house, alone? He’s not much for selfies on Instagram.
Throw out some ideas?
Dopers who lost weight, what was a fun reward you wanted?
(Oh: name of fancy pants is Charles Tyrwhitt. It’s what he’s wanted for some time. Couldn’t fit, and would get laughed outta the store a la “Pretty Woman” until recently.)
I know you said he’s not much into instragram (so I assume, posting pictures on the internet in general) however, if his reduction in weight is all noticeable, which I assume it is since it’s 80#, try imgur.
If he uploads a before and after picture, even with his face blurred out/cut off, he’ll get more pats on the back and attaboys than he knows what to do with.
Unlike facebook/instagram etc, anything you put on imgur can be seen by anyone, so a lot of people will see it and a lot of people will complement him.
Weight loss pictures are pretty common there.
There are whole subreddits dedicated to weight loss, intermittent fasting, etc., and posting pics is the norm there. People tend to be very nice and complimentary as well, and there are hundreds if not thousands of people posting their progress and getting encouragement from the community.
I don’t know. I mean, complements are like a short-lived sugar “high”. Vanity should take a back seat to health, and so he should be beaming with pride at how much healthier he’s going to be; health will pay off more and more in the long run.
I’ve found that the self-image boost, and/or fear ( for one’s mortality ) may get you there, as far as weight loss goes…but it’s feeling better physically that keeps you there and thus motivated to continue with whatever program.
Well, sure. That’s why I turned to the collective Dope HiveMind for alternatives. I was hoping for ideas about a ping type of bonus reward, for hitting a hundred mile milestone. (Heh. That’s exactly where the word originated!)
Yeah, yeah, he feels better. Yeah, yeah, better health.
Dude.
Seriously?
This is in the same camp as all the high school kids graduating this spring with no prom dates, no yearbooks filled with candid shots from their last semester on campus. The normal “YAY” stuff is gone - is it so much to ask, for ideas about alternative celebrations?
He may not need to alter his plan. If he has another 20 lbs. to lose, that could take a while. Even if he’s been losing weight at a rapid pace, weight becomes harder to lose as you become closer to a healthy weight. In fact, in some ways this social isolation could feed right into his plan. Say he does successfully lose 20 lbs. before he goes back to work: you walk in to your office 20 lbs. lighter, coworkers will notice, a lot more than if you just walked in maybe .3 lbs. lighter on a daily basis.
But, to not be a thread-shitter and go along with the spirit of the thread: I wonder if he could find any place outdoors to go. For example, I live near the Appalachian trail, which I think you can still access. If he could go on some hike that he wouldn’t have physically been able to do 100 lbs. ago, that’d give him a great sense of accomplishment. Plus, if he’s cooped up inside, getting some fresh air and exercise would probably feel pretty damn good, too.
It doesn’t sound like he cares what others think as much as he wants to show off his progress. Everyone rewards themselves differently. You’re happy because you’re healthier, he’s happy because he fits into a [smaller] shirt that he likes.
Besides, does the reason really matter? If you lose weight to get healthier or lose weight because you’re vain and egotistical and just want to be better looking and more attractive…you’re still healthier.
When I lost half my weight (over two years) I was working for a very lefty community organisation and nobody would admit to noticing because that may seem judgemental about fat or something, it drove me batty when I wanted a high 5 for a milestone. It was my hairdresser who made the biggest fuss in meat world but I had an online community of losers who gave me all the cheers in the end. Plenty of places talk weightloss and love success stories. A good before and after gets you feted as a God.
Before I lost 80 lbs, my big goal was to be able to wear a bikini without feeling horrible self-conscious. I’m there physically, and I do have one I’ve worn (once, lying on the deck - not swimming), but now the struggle is more mental, lol. I do post photos on IG. You said he’s not much for the selfies, but there is a HUGE community on IG for people going through weight loss (sadly, I feel the community for “body positivity / No babe you’re totally fine JUST AS YOU ARE / fat just cushions your organs” types is even larger). He could follow people like Obese to Beast, who lost something like, I dunno, 300 lbs?? Dude is ridiculously sweet and wholesome, to boot. Anyway, there’s a community he’d likely fit into very well, if he decides to give IG a go.
Reddit is also another option. There are communities like r/loseit and r/progresspic that are extremely welcoming to (healthy!) weight loss talk and photos. I credit the support I got from r/loseit in particular a lot when it comes to my own weight loss.
I’ve had horrible experience with Imgur, but some of it probably pertains to me being a woman. Even a lot of comments that didn’t sexualize my very non-sexual photos were obviously aimed at trying to hurt me (“Too bad you lost your hair,” because I started developing alopecia before I even started losing weight). He may fair better as a dude, but there will still be awful people out there, and unless he has a particularly strong backbone, I’d shy away from Imgur. I found reddit to be far more supportive.
I just want to congratulate anyone who’s lost weight!
I’ve always eaten Plenty O’ Carbs… the more useless, the better. When I lost my metabolism in my 40s and gained a gut, I lived with it. Now, when I try to lose weight it takes an incredible amount of willpower.
This winter, it was SO much work to lose 20 lbs. for my daughter’s wedding (had to, so I didn’t have to buy a new suit). But thanks to the pandemic, I’ve gained some back.
Hey, the gym’s been closed and last few weeks were too cold and rainy for biking… (and with being on the brink of both depression and panic, the carbs are back!).
My point: a toast to everyone managing their weight loss… I’ll join you soon, after I finish my own toast (Therapeutic Sourdough with homemade jam).
Hm. A lot of weight loss rewards that I know of focus on buying yourself new clothes or a new experience of some sort to celebrate, and that’s obviously not much good in the current environment.
Is there a hobby he likes? Maybe he could splurge on a new toy for that. New computer gear, video game, photography equipment, anything like that?
You could also send him a ‘congrats’ gift when he hits his goal - flowers are a popular one for women - maybe there’s something he’d like you could send instead, or maybe a gift certificate for that clothing place he likes? He probably wouldn’t use it right away, but it could help keep the dream alive!