Celebrities or businesses apologizing just angers both sides and pleases no one

Reading about Drew Brees’ recent apology, and Chick Fil-A’s apology over LGBT issues, and a host of other such apologies by celebrities or businesses, one trend generally appears:

Aforementioned celebrity or business will take a stance that outrages one side (Side A), but delights the other (Side B). But then upon facing fierce backlash from Side A, it then retracts its stance/statement and apologizes - which then enrages Side B, which had previously been pleased by the initial stance. The resulting fallout is that both sides, A and B, are now pissed off at this celebrity or business, which now has won few if any fans through the process, but lost a great many.

Suppose hypothetically, for instance, that Colin Kaepernick had apologized for taking a knee during the national anthem in NFL games, and vowed to stand for the anthem from now on. Had he done so, he would have angered the Black Lives Matters folks who had previously enthusiastically supported his kneeling, and lost their support - while gaining no support from the conservatives/Trumpers who had opposed his kneeling.

From a sheer popularity standpoint (setting morals, ethics, values, etc. all aside for a moment) - the practical lesson is apparently that if you make up your mind to take a bold stance for something, you had better stick to it, no matter how much criticism you face. Trying to please both sides will result in pissing off both and losing both.

It depends on what kind of apology it is. These days, most “apologies” seem pretty insincere, and more often than not, they are forced. Basically, the (person, company) is not the least bit remorseful about what they did, they just are sad that they got called on it. A truly heartfelt apology can actually help, but those are rare.

I wonder if the safest approach is to never take a bold stance for any issue and stick to platitudes that please everybody without actually saying anything.

If the apology is worded the right way – where the person apologizing admits they made a mistake and they will learn from the experience, it does a lot to mollify the people who raise the objections. It may piss off the other side a bit, but people rarely take action (often, they continue to believe the statement that caused the objection).

If it’s worded wrong it does no good for either side (i.e., “If anyone is upset by this, we apologize” – absolutely the worst apology ever because it implies the people who are upset are unreasonable).

In general, I don’t think people are reading the fine print that closely. They follow the overall sentiment.

Say some celebrity says, “I support Joe Biden” - then they get support from all the Biden voters. Yay.

But then when faced with backlash by Trumpers, that celebrity promptly backtracks: “I apologize for supporting Biden” - then he/she will get fierce backlash from all the Biden supporters, while still not having won over the Trump crowd.

Sometimes you just gotta take a stance and stick with it.

(Edit: for some reason, I can’t quote other posters with the reply box)

That’s not really a good example. Supporting Joe Biden (or even supporting Trump) is not something you need to apologize for.

If, however, it was a case of you using an ethnic slur, a sincere apology will help quell the controversy. People who use ethnic slurs won’t hate you, since they’ll think you were forced to do it. People who are the recipient of the slur won’t exactly embrace you with open arms, but it will mitigate their anger.

Has any one ever had to apologize for saying they support Biden? I mean, I get the point, but it’s really the opposite. A guy just had to apologize for wearing a T-Shirt of a network lefty’s don’t like. And I guarantee you that was not a sincere apology. He looked like a hostage in an ISIS video. That is a case where I think it would have been better off not apologizing.

Chick fil A apologizing is an example of an obviously insincere apology. They apologized for contributing to organizations bigoted against LGBT people, then stated “Oh no, we’re not stopping that behavior” and went on to keep contributing. It’s like punching someone in the face and saying that you’re sorry for punching them on the face in between blows.

I agree with Pantastic. Chick fil A apologizing is just an excuse to get their name in front of potential customers. I feel the same way if the apology comes from Starbucks or McDonald’s or any other big corporation whose real focus is sales and making money. I also dislike it when celebrities announce a “general” apology for having been racist or uninformed or stupid in the past and vowing to do better. I don’t care what you did or what you say you will do in the future. Just be better in all those respects and don’t try to get attention for it. It’s the attention-mongering that drives me nuts.

It all strikes me as pro forma at best and performative at worst.

With the exception of a small handful of well known egregious offenders who can cobble together something like a sincere apology, which is likely too little to late, the rest are just jumping on the bandwagon because it’s expedient and self serving to capitalize on a highly emotional moment and make it about them.

I can’t help but think that POC see right through this bullshit and think, “Fuck off! Nobody is thinking about you right now!”

Never complain, never explain

IMO, these types of apologies just embolden the aggrieved parties to come after you even harder, and to seek out new victims as well. You can’t make everyone happy. Just suck it up and move on.