Scentrino - Mobile computing just got stinky
IBUM - There is no magic server dust to fix your problems, but you can have this brown bag of booze to help you forget.
Untel - Sucking the last bit of life out of an ancient design.
Lapple - We didn’t sell out to Microsoft. WE DIDN’T!
SOL - So big people think we’re the Internet. Without us you’re…
Hewlett Wackard - Never did like having a business partner
Pinty Moore - you’re favorite soups with new alcohol gravy
Cheerihos: Everyone’s favorite way to wake up.
Fateway - You’re fated to pay for new hardware and repairs when our crappy products quit working the day after the warranty expires.
Pomp USA - your once stop extravagance store
Grape Nuns - Fiber & More!
General Pills - we got what you need
Harpie Permanent Markers - when you have to say it, say it with Harpie.
Electrosux - our name says it all
y-me Magazine - Publicizing teenage angst since 1976.
Payer - Headache pain relief – for a price.
Did anyone else have this run through their head when they saw the OP?
Faster than a rolling ‘O’…
Stronger than silent ‘E’…
Able to leap capital ‘T’ in a single bound…
Brayer-the laryngitis cure for donkeys, mules, hinnes, and jennies!
Coco Cola-soda made by a monkey!
General Alectric-We sell the perfect mix: alcohol, heavy machinery, and things that use lots of electricity!
Assimov-Sci-fi written by fat losers!
Scientific Americon-for the scientist who wants to trick the public out of their money!
Sadafed-Sure, we cured your headache, but now you’re full of depressants!
Marlbro - the cigarette for the forgotten cowboy: the African-American wrangler.
Boning - Makers of special passenger aircraft approved by the Mile High Club®.
AWOL–You may need to access the internet, but why the hell should we stick around for it?
Rubbermad–Plastic containers that should have been vaccinated for rabies.
Tubbermaid–Well, she floats, but you probably can’t fit her in your house.
Robbermaid–For when you didn’t really like your grandmother’s silver in the first place.
Tupperwar–Keeps food pipin’ fresh and does away with neighborhood terrorists. Tupperwar–making the Homeland just a little bit homier.
Reaper’s Digest–the only real news source for the minions of Death.
Clearly my cats’ mind control techniques are getting better. I could’ve sworn the OP said:
Change the Litter Game
(And strangely, my mistake was right on topic.)
Howzabout that reality TV show set in a bordello, Big Brothel?