. . .stick up that man’s butt has a stick up it’s. . .
. . .but it wasn’t me. I swear. It was. . .
. . .Butros Butros Ghali. Born in 1914, Butros Butros Ghali began life as. . .
. . .Mr. Clean will clean your whole house and everything in. . .
…this slaughterhouse, where chickens were…
…stuffed in a duck, then stuffed in a…
…pygmy marmoset, the smallest creature in the…
…known universe. Scientists now think that…
…it depends on what the word “is” means…
…never having to say…
…the tribe has spoken. Bring me your …
…big money! big money …
. . .bags under his eyes, a smaller Saddam Hussein appeared in an Iraqi. . .
. . .Cracker Barrel Old Country Store and. . .
. . .woke up this morning. got myself a. . .
…NEW CAAAR!! The 2004 Buick Skylark, complete with power steering and windows, California emission, and…
…a Royale with cheese. ‘Royale with cheese.’ That’s it. What do they call a Whopper?..
…radioactive sludge, leaking into the drinking reservoirs of several metropolitan water purifying stations. We’ll be monitoring this new development through the evening, so be sure to stay tuned to…
…Fox News, fair and balanced reporting. Coming up later will be…
…lies, damn lies, and statistics.’ This quote, commonly attributed to Samuel Longhorn Clemens, or Mark Twain, was actually spoken first by the renowned…
…Porky Pig, who was destined to become one of Warner Brothers biggest stars when…
…camels have sex. But conditions in the desert do not lend themselves to…
…stupid people like you. Listen to me! I’m speaking! I’m speaking! Burt, show her the…
…way to make a fortune without ever leaving your home, and without ever using a single…
…portion of the brain. The EKG showed a disturbing-looking…
…President Bush, who told reporters he looked forward to expanding relations with…
…this group of simians. Although damage has been superficial, they still frighten the local…
. . .bunch. That’s the WAYYYY we BECAAAAME the. . .
. . .luckiest man man man on the face face face of the. . .
. . .son, number one. ‘yeah, pop?’ This is one tall drink of cock. . .
. . .Robin Leach. And you’re watching lifestyles of the rich and. . .
…politically naive canidateds who pander to the voters, saying…
…Leaf Star Double Dragon Whirlwind attack! I’ve got you now Tsirukotaru, you mecha robot demon…
…that was denounced by the Deptartment of Agriculture yesterday. The Secretary further commented that…
…iceberg lettuice can be substituted for the parsely. Now, when cooking the…
…asian reporter Trisha Takanawa…
…we’re gonna shout! We’re gonna shout out until the whole world knows about…
“…Viagra, the most effective male-enhancement drug of the 21st century. Consult with your doctor before taking Viagra. Common side-effects include dry mouth, heart palpitations, and…”
“…stiff as a board. The Sheriff’s working on finding out what happened, Curly. Don’t you worry. He’s even getting help from…”
“…Marshall, Will and Hollyyyyy…on a routine expedition…hit the biggest earthquake the world has ever knowwwwwn…high above the rapids, it tossed their tiny raft…and plunged them down a 100 feet belowwwww…to the…”
“…Indianapolis Motor Speedway, where the race is just underway. It’s amazing, Tim, the cars are moving at such high speeds, they…”
… are going to the Land of Make-Believe, where Miss Henrietta Pussycat is talking with …
… neighbors who describe the suspect as always polite, friendly, and helpful. His cousin, Ethel Bronkowski, says that last winter during the blizzard, he was heard to …
… give 1,000 points each to Wayne and Colin. Ryan, on the other hand, …
… was attached to the lathe. Remember to wear protective eyewear when you’re …
…attending sex education in high school, making it the highest percentage since…
…Jesus said to the apostles, “I am the way and…”
…Now how much will you pay? If you guessed $49.99, guess again. Because the Amazing Rottiserie oven can now be had for only…
…1200 babies born to unwed mothers this year. The Governor called for more education, particularly in…
…Beverly Hills, on Rodeo Drive, where the rich and famous do their window shopping, take their lunches, and…
…pound it as hard as you can! You won’t dent it, because it’s made of…
…some fava beans and a nice Chianti. [slurp! slurp! slurp!]…
…[slurp! slurp! slurp!] Sunny Delight is just what your kids are looking for when…