::knock knock::
um…yeah, hi…anybody here??
I was reading about Wally, and decided that I had to get to know you people…so, I just registered and then this really tired looking guy told me I had to pass through inspection in here…
anybody know anything about this?..
should I just take a number?
you all look really busy…
I’ll just wait over here.
Dr. Pipefitter here, I’m ready for my first patient. Ahhhh, Purplebear, you look like you’re ready.
Please lie down on the examining table, er excuse me, please have a seat on the examining table, and we’ll start. Oh, BTW, I am also a certified massage therapist.
Um, I guess that makes you my examiner, Southern Style…
Please be gentle with me…
Hey, I’m not that far from Tallahassee (Central FL)–can I come too?
Well, Southern, if you don’t want to examine newbies, I’m sure one of these other gentlemen (?) will be willing to take care of my initiation exam?
Hey pipfitter, no offense, but since purplebear and I are on each other’s laminated lists, I think it’d be best of I handled the procedings from here on out. 
Of course, as well as any other dopers, Floridians or not.
We couldn’t call it Southern hospitality if we didn’t invite everybody.
Chrisbar
Damn you people work late and start early.
I had to close the practice early as it was Mrs. Style’s birthday. She’s 15 now and really looking forward to getting her “learner’s permit”.
Uh, Trouble – I’ll be as gentle as the situation demands.
Now where were those vice grips? I can’t seem to get your bra undone, I mean drawers off… I mean drawer open.
Yeah. That’s it. Drawer open. Trust me.
SouthernStyle
::walks in, stripping down::
Oh, good, there seems to be someone here who can handle sizes above D…
iampunha, how about a set of G’s (as in, quadruple-D)?
::pauses, listening::
Oh, damn, my son is awake. Shoot. Okay, well, I’ll be back in a few minutes - but you’ll have to settle for just triple-D by then. Hope that’s okay! (damn engorgement)
::runs out::
The rest of you can keep up with the shenanigans in this room. Ultress and I will be over in the jiggle closet for the next 24 hours. If you hear strange noises, just assume that everything is A-OK.
I’m very sorry m’am, but we don’t allow children in the examining room. Perhaps you should hire a baby sitter. I promise to have you home… er,I mean… we’ll be done by midnight.
SouthernStyle
I don’t know about this BratMan guy. On my first day on the SDMB they sent me to him for a prostate exam, but I don’t think he did it right. The doctor is not supposed to have both hands on your shoulders…
Wow, even the waiting room isn’t a good place for kids. Off to grandma’s you go, boyo, this is NO place for you (at least not for nearly two decades).
::runs back in::
Okay - Found a sitter! PHEW. Okay, now, where was I? Oh, yeah…
::disrobes::
Hey, can I get some SERVICE over here? I have to pick my son up by 9 … Um, what was that SouthernStyle? Shoot. Well, I’ll be back to quadruple-D before midnight, that’s for sure. ::hauls out cell phone:: Maybe she can keep him overnight… ::eyes SouthernStyle and iampunha
and starts dialing REAL fast::
…to see that you all were carrying on all through the night. Fighting the good fight…battling ignorance by selflessly opening your…ahem…I mean spreading your…ooooh, uh…knowledge! Yes, that’s it, knowledge. Spreading knowledge. <And spreading it very WIDE, by the looks of it>
Well, I’m rested and ready to show my parts…oops, I mean do my part. Anyone?
*I made it into Brat’s sig. Wow. I feel so special.
struuter
Oh, uh, Trouble – there’s a huge difference between being examined by SouthernStyle and being examined Southern Style. Or would you care to try for the perfecta?
Rats. Our secret is out. How much to keep quiet?
SouthernStyle
Everything, the whole 9 yards… um, okay, 9 yards is a BIT much. How much you got?
That was WAY too easy.
And anyone who’s seen Deliverance knows what that difference is.
I am NOT easy! Well. OK. So what if I am. But I’m not cheap! Well. Ok. Same argument…
SouthernStyle
HEY! What does a nice busty redhead have to do to get an exam around here? tapping foot
ssskuggiii said:
“Well, I insist you start with an oral exam before you proceed to the actual check-up. I am picky about procedure, and insist you go through all the steps.”
Oh, I will. I even have a manual - er, um . . . notes to myself here.
And the complete oral exam will go over some parts in excruciatingly thorough detail. This may take all day. It may take longer.
The manual exam will also take a loooong time. It may test proficiency with certain objects.
ssskuggiii, you sure you want to do this here, not in the privacy of your own room?