I’ve tried to convert my husband into a doper, too. After this thread, though, I’m glad he isn’t. 
Chrisbar
Palmyra, step right into this room over here . . .
Well excuse me, Southern, dook, Mully, I have a patient who needs my immediate attention. I don’t expect to return any time soon, so carry on without me. This is going to take a loooong time for me to do it properly. 
::wonders what happen to the bull rides::
Dude, we’ve discussed this 
Er you asked me and I replied to it in stupid things you did when you were young…
<sits down, back straight, hands on knees> Okay,dook. Teach. We are fighting ignorance. This might be an all-out battle against it. Choose your weapon…
Check-in for All Female Newbies
What if they’re only partly female?
While slightly frightened to get back into this thread…
Cool… I’m about 45 minutes north of San Antonio.
Partial Exams
I’m ready- hey! there’s no lock on this door! I guess that’s alright, I’m all for demonstrating proper <cleaning> technique for the room.
ponder… hmmm. Johnson City? San Marcos?
Ouch. my head hurts. Gotta stop thinking so hard.
Nah, Kerrville. Go west on I10.
dook,
Maybe Brat should post to the thread “forgotten things I posted when I was young”
::snicker::
Does this invalidate his license to perform these exams?
SouthernStyle
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Dook, I asked b/c I’m in Dallas, where athletes and the’r groupies almost outnumber the squirrels…
Ahhhh, yer a Kerrvert 
Well, that’s nice of you to say, SouthernStyle. I didn’t mean to insult you personally, it’s just that I truly feel sorry for all you poor people who have to live down there in the heat & kudzu.
'sides, how do YOU know what I’m like?!?
Yeah, but I’m neither retired or blue-haired. Not that there’s anything wrong with either condition…
Kervert?? Don’t think I’ve heard that before…
Go back earlier in this post and read how long I’ve been at work today. I admit I’m not at my mental best.
<from the room for private inspection, all muffled>
“No…don’t use the sponge there…”
“mmphm mpghpmmf!”
“I’m almost clean! I’m almost clean!”
I read your posts. (Besides, around this joint butterin’ up pays the best dividends.)
The south aint really all that bad. Why it only hit 96 yestiday and by 10:30 las nite we was back down to 88.
Besides, I learned my lesson years ago. My folks were both born and raised in small farm towns in western Minnesota. Sometime around my 12th birthday we were visiting family up that way when I learn why the mosquito is the state bird.
I was playing in the yard with my kid brother and a cousin when about a dozen of the biggest darned mosquitos that I’d ever seen started circling overhead. Pretty soon they started buzzing us, and before long it seemed like they were actually herding us into the corner. Then it got really weird. I swear I heard one of those mosquitos looked at my cousin and asked the mosquito next to him if they should “eat this one here or carry it home for dinner”.
And you feel sorry for us southerners…
Now where did that examining room get off to???
SouthernStyle
wooohooo now Mully if you gonna do my ‘exam’ we’ll need a private examination room. Enter at your own risk!