Chess Players' Head Explodes!!

Shocking news out of Moscow today! You’ve heard of Spontaneous Human Combustion, well how about Spontaneous Head Explosion!?

***MOSCOW.- Doctors are blaming a rare electrical imbalance in the brain for the Bizarre death of a chess player whose head literally exploded in the middle of a championship game. :eek:


Gotcha! :slight_smile:

Never really happened, but it is very, very funny. :wink:
(see comments below)

gotcha? got who? I figured it was an April Fools joke :slight_smile:

Gotcha? Try something even halfway believable next time. I started to read the article, and then figured it wasn’t worth it, so I scrolled down to see if you’d been directed to a debunking yet.

Please don’t insult our collective intelligence by suggesting that any of us might, even for a moment, consider this possible.

An April Fools Joke on 4/4 would be lame indeed. :wink:

Just thought I would share it for those who havn’t seen it before.


Hehe, true I didn’t think most of you would believe it. :wink:

Still, you’d be surprised at how many people I have shown that article to who did believe it! :wink:

Lots of people believe in Spontaneous Human Combustion, why not heads exploding? Seems like it could be a sliver of a chance that it could, maybe, someday happen. I kidding again. :wink:



As an international chess player, I can assure you that the ‘Moscow Candidate Master’s Chess Championships’ doesn’t exist.

Now if I told you that the Women’s World Chess Champion just beat the World Chess Champion, would you believe me?

You should’ve had his brain explode while he was on the John. Would’ve been funnier, anyway. Well, to us sick folks… :wink:

I read two lines of it, then realized that I’d heard this one before. Not that I believed it the first time I read it, of course. :slight_smile:

Yes and No. :wink:

True, Zhu Chen (FIDE Womens Champ) did just beat Ruslan Ponomariov (FIDE Mens Champ) in a game in the FIDE World Cup. Wicked Sicilian/Najdorf game BTW. :wink:

But, as we all know, FIDE is a farce right now, and has been for a long time. The real World Champion right now is Vladimir Krammnik, and to make things even more confusing, the best player in the world is Garry Kasparov (10 straight Super GM Tournament Wins in a row! Wow!).

So until a women (and I hope to god it is Judit Polgar) beats either Krammnik or Kasparov, that record is dubious at best.

Congratulations on knowing that!

I wouldn’t say FIDE were a farce - they do offer decent prize money, and hold regular events.
But I agree there are problems, e.g. with the arbitrary introduction of a rapid time control, the unsatisfactory main source of FIDE funds.

Kramnik ‘qualified’ for his World Championship by losing to Shirov. Not satisfactory.
His current ‘defence’ against qualifiers including a German picked by the sponsors is (in my opinion) a regression to the disappointing events of 80-100 years ago, when the main qualification for a title challenge was a wealthy backer, not chess ability.

Yes Garry is undoubtedly the strongest player in the world. But we have world-record holders and Olympic champions, so why not have a World Championship contest?!

P.S. I hope Irina Krush comes through, because she came to a tournament I organised and was a splendid ambassador for the game.

Ah, the joys of tabloid “journalism”. A quick google found a site with what seems to be the original version, from the May 24, 1994 issue of The Weekly World News.

Isn’t that what happened to Elvis ?

Agreed. Shirov was robbed. Shirov would have been trounced by Kasparov (his one-on-one record with him is like -15 or something) however. Krammnik, who is clearly the #2 player in the world, deserved to play Kasparov for the title at some point tho. Odd, that it happened in this way.

But technically you are right, Zhu Chen was first world champion women to beat a world champion male in a game. Impressive. That Ponomariov kid is one heck of a good player. And he is only, what, 18 years old?

I just hope at some point Kasparov, Krammnik, Anand, and FIDE can work things out to unify into one confederation. Rename it and be done with it! And while they are at it they need to do away with that seperate womens rating system. Judit Polgar doesn’t need it! Makes no sense to have two.

glee, you play chess online anywhere? I play at, best online chess site out there.



My brain hurts.

“The man standing next to me,
his head was exploding,
I was praying the pieces
wouldn’t fall on me.”

– Bob Dylan, “Day of the Locusts”

I know this is late in the game, but since someone else found a link to the article, I removed the full text of the link from the OP, since we try to encourage people to avoid posting the full text of a copyright article at the SDMB.

This case seems to me to be kind of a gray area however so I’m going to ask for clarification and when I get an answer I’ll post it in our ATMB thread “guidelines for posting.”

Doh! Sorry chief. The satire has been out for so long now, I thought it was in the general domain. :wink:

It doesn’t matter that Shirov has a bad record v Garry. Upsets do happen in sport.

Kramnik does NOT deserve to play for the World title just because he has a high rating. Win through the qualifying, like everyone else!

I play there too, but rarely (since my job is teaching chess!).
You’ll never guess my handle (unless you guess glee :smiley: )

This has to be from the Weekly World News.