As per the title, this is a training game.
As a professional chess coach, I will offer advice, comments and analysis.
SiXSwordS can take a move back, ask me for advice (or even what move to play!).
There is no time limit (and neither side should use computers!)
And now for the result of the coin flip for colours…
Red won the toss!!! Amazing!!! 
Oh, sorry, pray continue…
This ought to be fun. Wish I had a board handy.
Actually if some kind soul would like to put up a board position every so often, that would be great. 
And they’re lining up on the field.
Rook falls back to pass…Pawn catches it, lateral back to knight…FUMBLE! White Bishop’s got it…he’s running…he’s running, amazing, nobody’s even close to capturing him! And TOUCHDOWN for white!
And they’re lining up on the field.
Polite applause from the small crowd as the first two Pawns come out to open the batting.
It’s overcast here, so the wicket should be good for seamers.
The umpires are wearing their sweaters … and it looks like a Bishop is going to open the bowling.
Even at past forty and off a two-pace run-up, that might be a little testing for an amateur.
Well Knight will be next to bat…
…but it’s all over as King resigns!
Heh. Until I moused over the links I thought you’d somehow won the match in one move.
I can’t find any Rook(e)s, but I’ve turned up two Castles and a Board so far that have played first-class cricket in England… only a Quin though, not a Queen. No Pawns, but an abundance of Manns.
No, the fastest possible mate is two moves by each side.
Fischer, however, once just plain refused to turn up, and hence lost in no moves. A record that should hold up.
Giant rocks fall and everyone dies.
Sorry. Carry on.
Sorry for the slow start, I’ve had a extraordinarily bad day and I am not at all up for chess right now. A good night’s sleep should cure me.
It’ll be a while before I play, but the coin was heads and I chose black. I should be back some time tomorrow.
No worries - there’s no time limit.
My general advice for inexperienced players:
In the opening, try to:
Glee SiXSwordS
(I assume you know chess notation. I’m using the standard tournament one, but if you prefer the longer style e.g. e2-e4 I’m happy to switch to that.)
If you wouldn’t mind using long notation for my benefit I’d appreciate it.
Only one thing can go to e4 the first move. 
Psst: SiXSwordS, play 1. … e6 I want to see how glee handles a French.
I was referring to the rest of the game. :mad:
I play the French Advanced (3. e4-e5). Not perhaps the best, but it suits my style.