I was watching Ghostbusters recently and thought I’d pose this question. Let’s say you are doing battle with an ancient, shape-shifting, Sumerian god who has just entered our world and is intent on destroying all civilization. But that god gives you the opportunity to choose the form it takes to go on a destructive rampage, starting by destroying you. The pressure is on! You try to empty your head and not think anything, or you maybe you try to think of the most harmless thing. Something that could never, ever, possibly destroy you. But inevitably, something just pops in there. What? What just pops in there?
A standard size ice cube. In my part of the world, 350+ days of the year, I won’t have to wait long to loot the corpse…
A tilde(~).
Jell-O.
Giant squid.
A cloud of gas composed of 78% nitrogen, 22% oxygen.
They have names for those things.
Names like “Katrina”.
Dick Cheney. The face-shooting one.
Fair enough. A byte (which happened to be ‘^’) was just sitting in a computer deep in a vault at the Y-12 National Security Complex in Tennessee, quietly minding its own bytey business, when a random quantum fluctuation turned it into a rampaging ‘~’ of destruction.
The program is somewhat different now. Oh yes. Sweet dreams. :eek:
boobies
It occurs to me that this would have been funnier had I written:
~Rysto()
sigh
Hmm… would Katrina have been as tough without some hydrogen in the mix?? I think not.
but N and O can still cause a lot of trouble if they’s comin’ atcha fast enough I admit.
A giant automobile tire. Just bouncing along…
A cloud of N[sub]2[/sub] and NO could make for some very briefly funny times.
A guy really, really high on weed. Because while he’d have the power to destroy the world, he’d lack the drive to do it; at the very least, we’d have until he got the munchies and ate everything to find another solution.
Is this a contest to choose the least destructive form?
Then, I choose a snail. An ordinary American garden snail. How in blue blazes could one tiny snail do ANY damage?
If we’re not being ‘serious,’ but instead being humorous, then I will choose a giant rubber double-sided dildo.
It’s not that I’d WANT to think of a giant squid. But when I read the OP the first thing that popped into my head was the giant squid from the “write this story one sentance at a time” thread. So I fucked up, a giant squid is gonna destroy the world because I couldn’t concentrate, so sue me.
The Death Star.
Ice-blue double-ended jelly dong.