CIA spooks sabotaged my undies!

Via cruel.comone of the best crack-pot websites ever.

This woman is one of the thousands of victims of The New World Order’s “attempt to create a slave society in which, in the early stages at least, most slaves (us) are not aware of what is happening.”

The New World Order is apparently being managed by Underpants Gnomes.[ul][li]Stage One: Put holes in people’s underpants.[]Stage Two: ----[]Stage Three: Global Domination.[/ul]Okay, they’re diversifying – they’re not focused on underpants 24/7, but undergarments clearly play an important part of the Master Plan.[/li]
Most of the perpetrator’s sabotage efforts could easily be mistaken for the results of more mundane forces, like entropy, but some of them are fiendishly perverse. I think my favourite one is:

And the bit about Windows not working properly all the time is alarming, too.

Sigh. I should feel terribly guilty for finding this amusing. But I don’t. I find it endlessly fascinating that these sorts of delusions are so uniform.

I looked around for other web traces of this specimen, and found quite a few. Here’s a more conventional mind-control page from her.

I find this interesting:

I just wish she’d learn not to keep small animals, since so many of them are tortured and killed “while she is out.” :frowning:

I remember seeing a good one a couple years ago. (Sorry, I don’t have a link.)

The basic scenario was that a group of aliens had joined forces with a secret government agency and were using mind-control devices on the general populace. But there was a rival group of aliens allied with a secret international cartel that could control the weather, creating and steering hurricanes. These were the good guys, seeking to end the mind control and remote torture.

The author, as I recall, was offering to broker a truce between the two groups. He was also planning to create a museum dedicated to victims of mind control. One of the terms of the truce was that the evil aliens had to supply samples of their devices to be displayed in the museum.

Ya think the guy was seeking some validation of his beliefs, there?

I used to laugh at this kind of thing. Now I feel more of a morbid curiosity. But it is fascinating.

Tracking and telemetry have reached science fiction levels of efficiency, and I can tell you from 7 years’ personal experience, those guys in adjacent apartments to mine can tell you the diameter of each nostril, even when I am sleeping in a sheet steel cocoon which even when the side door is open nearly blocks all AM and FM radio signals. [/qupte]


Damn, something – or someone made me type “/qupte” instead of “/quote.” Neither the fact that I’m typing around a sleeping cat in my lap nor the fact that I failed to preview could have anything to do with this.

'Nuff said.

Sounds like this tuff was written by my ex brother in law… he had a conspiracy theory for EVERYTHING…

its all aplot by the oil companies… coz if our cars got 50 miles to the gallon theyd go broke:rolleyes:

My dog chews holes in my underwear. Oh no! Does that mean she’s a CIA spook?