Classic Films That Should Become Musicals?

Cafe Society
61

Erin Brockovich!

You’ll have the rousing They’re Called Boobs, Ed!.

You’ll have Erin singing soulfully under a spotlight–I was Miss Wichita.

George will and Erin will do one of those “duets” where they’re both singing separately on different parts of the stage. George will be yearning for his wild motorcycle life, while Erin will be coming to terms with the fact that she must sacrifice her relationship with George for the good of the people of Hinckley.

And you’ll definitely have one of those big numbers where two big groups are having a musical “fight,” going back and forth, like the Jets and the Sharks… You’ll have Erin and her cronies on the side of Chromium 6, while the gray-suited people from PG&E will be singing for Chromium 3.
“It was three!”
“It was six.”
“It was three”
“It was six!”
Man, I’d better not say anymore… I might just have created a monster…

62

Frederick Frankenstein - Roger Bart
Inga - Sutton Foster
Igor - Christopher Fitzgerald
Elizabeth - Megan Mullaly
Frau Blucher - Andrea Martin
Inspector Kemp/Blind Hermit - Fred Applegate
The Monster - Shuler Hensley (who I didn’t realize was in Van Helsing, having never seen it)

63

But now I really want to see the “Complete Works of William Shakespeare (Abridged)” guys doing “The Complete Harry Potter (Abridged).” This needs to happen!

64

Schindlers List?er maybe not.

65

“I could have sung more…”

66

Snakes, on the damn plane.
Snakes, are a damn.
Snakes, make me insane.
Snakes, effecting my brain.
Snakes, where is John Wayne.

Snakes! Snakes! snakes!
Won’t some one get the Motherfuckin’snakes off this motherfuckin’ plane.
Personally I imagine it as a Duet with a Thurl Ravenscroft type voice as the lead.

67

Okay, lt’s see if this works:

*GOOD MORNING VOLDEMORT

Oh, oh, oh
It’s a quarter past five
And I’m feeling alive with magic today
Oh, oh, oh
Get out of my bed
Get washed and dressed
My robe’s freshly pressed!
Breakfast in the Great Hall
I’ll obey the call
It’s a morning routine
I always make
Oh, oh, oh
But it can’t compare
To the jobs and the
Tasks I must undertake

Good morning Voldemort!
We’re engaged in a total war
I think we’d all like to see
A Hogwarts that’s Riddle-free

Good morning Voldemort!
I take strength from Dumbledore
I ask if today it’ll be
Voldemort against me!

Oh, oh, oh
Look at my friends
Can Malfoy’s contend with mine today?
Oh, oh, oh,
I’ve got my cloak and my phoenix wand
I say, bring it on!

The professors at school
They know I’m no fool
They seem to say
“Harry, it’s up to you”
So, oh, oh
Don’t hold me back
'Cause today I’d also take Pettigrew

Good morning Voldemort!
You’re rotten right to the core
You’re even worse than Professor Snape
And that’s neither a jest nor jape

Good morning Voldemort!
Whether or not you step through the door
There’ll come a day it’ll be
Voldemort against me!

I know every spell
I know every charm
I know how best to cause you harm
I see those Dementors lurking ahead
My Patronus protects me
From a feeling of dread!

So, Oh, Oh
Come out and play
Let’s do it today; I’m a busy guy
Oh, oh, oh
You say you won’t die
Well, c’mon, let me try!

The Ministry says No!
But the Order says Go!
The latter’s a message I can’t mistake
Oh, oh, oh
I just can’t wait
One more moment for your life to take…

Good morning Voldemort!
We’re engaged in a total war
I think we’d all like to see
A magic world that’s Riddle-free

Good morning Voldemort!
I take strength from Dumbledore
I hope today it’ll be
Voldemort against me!*

May need a little work on certain rhythms, but I’d say we’re pretty close. :cool: