Wasn’t as snarky as it could be. Intended as a distillation of the OP to clarify why someone would think it’s racist.
like I say, not disparaging … just amused
Do you even know that his heritage is Indian and his parents are Indian, as opposed to say, from Pakistan or another place? As mentioned, the turban is likely Sikh, which is religion, not nationality.
I wouldn’t worry about it too much. Some people are so stuck on PCness that it gets a little silly.
I would be most curious to know: Do you know that he is ethnically/culturally Indian, or was that an assumption based on his dress/accent/appearance?
My take on it is this:
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Asking someone whether they have a unique insight seems perfectly innocent to me, regardless of whether the reason for it was based on their race. Their answer might be ‘yes’, or it could simply be ‘no’; there need not be any offense taken.
Conversely, assuming that someone is “our resident Indian expert in the company” based on their race (rather than based on prior evidence of knowledge) is where you run into some trouble.
In my mind, it’s fine to ask someone if they have unique knowledge because of their race, but it’s not fine to assume that they ought to. -
Originally, ‘racism’ was a word meaning to have a belief in the superiority or inferiority of a person based on their race, or prejudice/discrimination against someone because of their race. This is my preferred meaning when talking about racism and, as such, this is certainly not an example of racism.
However, over the decades, the word ‘racism’ has been generalized to a much more inert concept that includes ‘any act that has a racial basis or justification’. That is, an act can be ‘racist’ without actually being hurtful, untrue or malicious.
Using this definition, what you said was racist. However, using this definition, the fact that it was racist doesn’t necessary mean that it was negative or worthy of reprimand/correction.
In summary, either what you said was not racist … or it was racist, using a weak and inert definition of racist. But either way, what you said sounded presumptive and possibly ill-informed, in an unhelpful way.
Yes, his parents are Indian, and I think he may have been born in India too. He has no connection to Pakistan or any place other than India.
Let’s put it this way … stop worrying about choosing a definition of “racist” and working out whether this would meet that definition. That’s a mug’s game.
Speaking as an Indian-American, if I were on the other end of this kind of thing, I would be pissed off too. I only hope that I would feel comfortable enough to express that feeling like the person did in this example.
On one hand, one may stereotype by assuming that someone who belongs to a particular heritage is closely familiar with what has been taking place in the country connected to that heritage. On the other hand, one might be overreacting by seeing that stereotyping as offensive, unless one gets annoyed by being stereotyped regularly.
Given that, I like this answer to questions like, “Where are you from?”
I think the answer is, it depends. Obviously in this case, umbrage was taken. Miss Manners would say you don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable.
A better approach might be to ask if anyone on the call had domain knowledge that might help in this case? A request for volunteers. Not putting any one person on the spot but asking for insights from the broader group. Still might make the “one thing is not like the other” person feel spotlighted, but to a much lessor degree than “Hey Bikram”.
Keep in mind that your colleague could easily be third generation Sikh in America. Grandparents immigrated, parents born in america and colleague a grandchild that grew up somewhere like the large overseas Sikh community in the California Northern Sacramento valley around Yuba City. I had classmates in junior high in bumfuck northern sacto valley that were born in America Sihk second generation in the 1970’s. Heck, they could have grandkids now that are 4th generation American. Fact is, there are just not a lot of third or fourth gen American’s that are familiar with any old country be it Italy or India, nor speak the language natively.
Dunno. I am a fluent Mandarin speaker but a white guy that first studied the language in University. I have learned to tread carefully and test the waters with Asian folks in the US. Some have been in the US for more generations than my family and have about zero cultural and linguistic ties to China. When asked in they are by chance mandarin speakers, the answer ranges from from “I wish” to “dude, I’m an American.”
When I ask Chinese Mainlander immigrants (first gen, based on name and appearance) if they are Mandarin speakers, the answer ranges from "真的吗“ to “dude, I’m an American.”
When I ask Asian looking folks (usually paired with Chinese kinda names) if they are Mandarin speakers, the answers range from “Huh” to “wow, so am I” to “dude, I’m an American.” YMMV
Just to re-iterate what others have said, it’s the second part here that matters.
People can define ‘racist’ however they want, but what you did was clearly not right. And the part you got wrong was making assumptions about your co-worker based mainly on his heritage.
This isn’t somebody who is Indian who happens to have lived in the US for a long time. You self-admittedly are not certain if this person was born in the US or not. Culturally, this makes him more American than you are. And certainly more American than Indian at this point.
What you got wrong was making the opposite assumption based on superficial clues, like his appearance, name, and some knowledge about his parents.
This trope is so common, it even has a name - forever foreign. There are Asian-Americans and Latinx whose families have been here for generations and I am willing to hazard that all of them have been asked a variation of “how long have you been here?”
Consider the following situation:
Say you instead have a white co-worker named Peter Hartmann. Looks and sounds like anybody from Anywhere, USA. Do you single them out as your resident German expert? If not, why not?
Turns out Peter’s family came over to the US when he was 10, never went back even to visit, never mentions it about himself, and you might have heard that in passing in the break room once as part of a casual conversation. Would it have crossed your mind he would somehow have a unique knowledge of German postal customs despite coming here so young? If not, why not?
And do you understand how weird it would be to ask Peter about his unique insights into German culture as part of a business meeting? Do you think this would be a common occurrence or considered an extremely odd and possibly inappropriate line of questioning in a business meeting?
Yes, this exactly.
This is the crux of the matter. You assumed that if you didn’t see a “negative connotation” and said something without malice or (obvious to you) disdain, it wasn’t racist. Well-intended as it may be, your definition sets a very low bar. Examples of racist statements that would not meet your definition of racism:
“Hey, you know how the Chinese name their babies? Throw a box of silverware down the stairs. Hahahahaha. What? That’s SO not racist! I told it to this Chinese guy at my old job, and he laughed like crazy.”
“I suck at math. That’s why during tests, I always sit by an Asian kid, ha-ha. Huh? That is SO not racist! It’s a compliment to say Asian kids are good at math!”
“It’s not racist when Harper Lee says the church was filled with the ‘warm bittersweet scent of clean Negro.’ My college roommate was Black, and when I asked her what that intriguing smell was that she and her [Black] friend had, she said, 'Oh, that’s just our natural scent.”
These are all remarks made to me by people who swore they weren’t racist. No one said them with malice or disdain, and the speakers didn’t see a negative connotation.
You need a definition that sets a higher bar.
I would worry if I’d offended a colleague. Isn’t that more to the point, however inadvertently it was done?
I’m Jewish. I talk about being Jewish. I make a stink when some required thing is scheduled on a Friday night or a Saturday, with no alternative. I make a stink when “Winter holiday” parties are mandatory. I know a lot about Judaism. I volunteer answers to questions people have. I attend a daily minyan most mornings, and people know it. And I have a Jewish name. Right now, I’m in a Jewish workplace, but I haven’t always been.
If someone had a question about Judaism, and asked me, that would be completely natural.
But if I had never said a word about Judaism, and someone made an assumption based on my last name alone that I would know something, or be able to provide something, and this happened to me on a regular basis, I would probably get pretty snappy about it.
A turban means nothing, other than that he follows a certain religion, to which he could have converted, and be of any ethnicity, I’m pretty sure. (I am not an expert on religions that are not Jewish.) How is it that you know where his parents are from? Does he, in fact, discuss his background?
Honestly, I’m not sure there’s enough information to say whether or not this is racist.
But if he felt it was, what have your past dealings with him been like?
Your co-worker sounds combative. He could have just said “nope.” I live in a super-racist country though, so maybe my racism meter is defective.
Was he hired to be an expert on the culture of the whole of India? Have you ever talked to him enough to know the extent of his knowledge? No, you just stereotyped him based on his appearance and name. That’s pretty rude.
To add on to @RivkahChaya’s point, if you asked me about Israel I would likely not know as I’ve never been there. Brisket and guilt, that I can speak about.
Malice is not a requirement for behavior to be racist. Nor does naivete negate it.
This is a fundamental point which most white people find extremely difficult to grasp. It isn’t about you or your ostensible intentions. It is about the impact you are making on others.
OP, you gave the example of being Canadian and therefore not having a problem with being asked about Canada. But if I’m reading this correctly, your colleague is American. It doesn’t matter what his religion is or where his parents are from - you singled him out based on his race, not his nationality, and I’m glad he called you out on it.
He may never even have been to India.
Presumably if he felt he had the expertise you needed, he would have volunteered this information.
Sometimes those that are supposedly “offended” have to get over themselves.