Commercials that make me furious

Ok, here’s the thing I don’t get about that commercial. The label turns blue when the beer is cold…who the fuck is surprised that a bar has cold beers? Where do these guys live, Egypt?

All the new pot-smoking PSAs make me stabby. Most notably, the one where the kids light fire to important treasures (diploma, guitar) to show that the reefer screwed them out of achieving their dreams, and the one where the guy is just standing there while all his stoner friends change his clothes and hair and the voiceover talks about losing who YOU are when you let others control what you do. They aren’t nearly as bad as Reefer Madness, but they’re still really irritating. It’s almost enough to make me take up smoking again, just so I can prove them wrong.

Enterprise Rent-a-Car. This lady has car trouble on the way to her kid’s soccer game. She gets it to a repair place, and calls Enterprise to bring her a car.

She then gets the kid to soccer on time!!!

Teh stupid. It hurts.

It’s micro$oft $ync…

yeah, that’s something I want, a ford product (crap) running the worst piece of crap OS on the planet (m$)

the commercial should go;
Driver: “Call home.”
Car: “I’m sorry, Dave, I can’t do that…”
at that moment, the BSOD appears on the vehicle’s fancy LCD display in the dash, the steering locks up, the wheels stop dead, and the car careens out of control into a telephone pole

as the camera pans back from the LCD display, we see an error message that states “GENERAL CAR FAULT; THIS VEHICLE HAS PERFORMED AN ILLEGAL OPERATION AND HAS BEEN SHUT DOWN”

Even worse Sync commercials are the ones where people are so used to their cars responding to voice commands that they expect everything to respond to them. There’s one where a doctor says “Anesthesia on” before starting surgery; not only does she not understand why the patient feels pain when she starts to cut him open, but then the patient tries to order the anesthesia machine (which is sitting there unattended) to somehow magically put him under. :rolleyes:

Isn’t that the one where the kid says “Way to go, mom!” and gives her a high-five or something? That was the truly stupid part to me.

A confession about the Progressive Cashier…

I find her to be Quirky Hot.

That is all.

Oh, yeah:

There’s a commercial where Dad is utterly dumbfounded and completely bamboozled by the prospect of attempting to cook dinner for his family. So he orders pizza. And this makes him a hero. Not just to his kids, but to his wife as well.

Grr.

-FrL-

This is THE most awesome thing I’ve read all day. The entire post was great, actually, but this line…I still can’t stop laughing. You rock!

All drug commercials.

Gosh, Sally Field, what are you going to do with all that extra time you have now that you only have to take one pill a month instead of three? That must have been just horrible for you, but now you have that extra five seconds to spend with your stupid rugrats.

Ask your doctor about new Fuckital. Cures everything. Side effects may include nose bleed, anal bleed, a rotting corpse-like stench coming from your ears, and a third term for George Bush. Fuckital, when you really don’t give a damn.

The people made out of plumbing pipes: someone please get me a pipe cutter and a soldering gun. I’ll give them a problem they’ll never get over.

That annoying idiot who sells KA-BOOM!!! GETS EVERYTHING CLEAN!!! REMOVES YOUR FINGERPRINTS AND YOUR SENSE OF SMELL!!! Stop screaming at me!

The one where they bring in the new Pizza Hut pasta to a trendy New York restaurant and (surprise!) fool the customers.

Um, sorry, but I don’t think Pizza Hut delivery pasta is even going to *approach *the level of quality you can get in a trendy New York Italian restaurant.

I also don’t have a lot of tolerance for commercials that portray men as bumbling fools who don’t know their ass from their elbow. And let’s not even touch on the Jared commercials…“Your wife will think you’re having an affair unless you buy her this gaudy bauble! Because she’s that shallow!” :rolleyes:

The seasonal jewelry commercials: Give your wife this shiny diamond thingy to let her know she’s special. She’s so special that you’re giving her the same mass-produced piece of overpriced crap that thousands of other clueless men are giving their “special” someone. “Every kiss begins with Kay.” So does your krap.

I always envision the Family Guy parody of those jewelry commercials. It helps me get through them and makes me laugh.

Diamonds, she’ll pretty much have to.

Huh, I thought the boy said his father was coming to pick him up.

And I could’ve sworn the mom said something to her kids about the airport, meaning that they were going to MISS A PLANE FLIGHT by staying with this boy.

I’m frankly not sure many people would make the same decision.

Vivaaaaaaa Viagraaaaa

Oh, honey, it’s even grosser then that. She’s raising up his nose to get a drink of water. Because Mentos are so mouth-watering.

I threw up in my mouth a little bit the first time I saw it.

Huh? I don’t think that’s it.

She raises up his nose because he’s sitting next to the water cooler (like pushing down on the tap) and then she kisses him to get “mouth-water” from the Mentos.

It’s idiotic, but it’s not as half as weird as it looks.

I cannot stand toothbrush commercials.

Typically, they cut to a lab straight out of Star Trek where dudes in white lab coats and safety glasses are finger dragging GUI windows that are suspended in mid air and then pondering over them while stroking their chins.

Yea, right. They’re frigging toothbrushes, people. Snap out of it.

Oh, and a second on the drug commercials:

They cut through twenty people who say “Ask your doctor” or “Ask your doctor about Bullshitia” That’s all they say. Nothing else, just “Ask your doctor”.

So, what, I’m supposed to go to the doctor and then he says, “So, what seems to be the problem?”

“Oh, nothing, I just wanted to ask you about Bullshitia.”

“Well, that’s a drug used to treat post-menopausal women for XYZ. And you are a 36 year old man. How about you come in when you have a problem and I’ll decide what drugs you need and when, Ok?”

“Sound good, you’re the doctor.”

“Ok then.”

What do you mean by “to get ‘mouth-water’” if you don’t mean “to drink water from his mouth”?

I read the commercial the same way Marlitharn does–the lady is drinking water from his mouth, said water having been produced by the mentos’ quality of being “mouth-watering.”

-FrL-

to true, I really hate the one where pc is singing some song and lamenting about people leaving vista for mac…seriously they are fucking leaving for xp no one has ever left vista for mac, vista runs programs, mac just looks pretty and pisses me off every time I have to do anything with my mac laptop owing friend because his fucking mac wont do 99.9999999999999999999999999999% of the things computers are supposed to do. (ok I exaggerate, macs wont do more like 90% of the things computers are supposed to do)