him: “hey wanna go out to (car/apartment/hotel room)”
me: “ok. Your condoms or mine?”
him: “uh, nah, I don’t use that shit.”
Leering.
I did think about that possibility an hour or two later. I’m still not interested.
Someone who tells me straight away how much money they make.
Many of the above, and interest in sports. My first husband was sports obsessed, and he’s turned me off it for life…not that I ever understood it in the first place. I’m sorry, but I can’t handle it anymore.
Yes, sports fans, our relationship would have to be sex only. 
And **Gaudere **claims another victim. 
In the days of blogs, myspace and a generation sometimes called the “me” generation? Do go on!
Anyone who immediately acts like I am their soul mate for life.
Anyone over the age of 25 who is still living at home and being taken care of.
Anyone too controlling. Passive controlling especially.
Oh, I am soooo glad my dating days are long behind me.
Ignorance - If your opinions are based on the spoutings of some celebrity and not on your own search for information, you can crawl back between the pages of Us. Tell me that you oppose the war because of reports you have read, not because Sean Penn says so. Religious zealotry applies here, also. If you take the Bible literally and repeat what your preacher said about the evils of homosexuality and how God/Allah/FSM/Bob is going to strike down the non-believers, I don’t want you around.
Appearance - I know I shouldn’t judge a book by its cover, but it doesn’t take a lot of effort to apply a little soap and shampoo or to wash your clothes. It’s not grunge, it’s gross.
Major body modifications - Pierced ears are ok, even double pierced can look nice. But if your head has so much metal that you are in fear of airport detectors, forget it. Same for tattoos. A little rose or heart can be cute but when you have more ink than a comic book, I have to say no. Plastic surgery falls into this category as well. If you are not biodegradable because of the implants and the Botox makes it impossible for you to convey emotions then I want nothing to do with you. I want a woman, not a Barbie doll.
Drugs – Casual drinking (a couple beers/glasses of wine/cocktails) are alright. I don’t like drunks and will not be carrying you out of the bar. I also have never found a stoned person attractive, only stupid. I don’t care if you think it’s no big deal. You look like a moron with your glassy eyes and vapid expression. Not to mention the fact that you are purposely doing something illegal.
Racism/sexism – I don’t want to hear your view that Jews control the media and Mexicans are ruining the country. Plus, if I hold the door for you, don’t take that as a demeaning gesture at your gender. I’m trying to be polite, damn it. Which leads to…
Swearing – I understand that in today’s society, swearing is common. This is a PG-13 world. Most people sprinkle their conversations with an assortment of curse words you can hear during primetime on network TV. But if you say things that would make Gunnery Sergeant Hartman blush, I have no respect for you. It doesn’t take much intelligence to be creative and colorful without being vulgar.
And as for those Mexican Jew! Well…
Re the chew: it’s still gross. It’s disgusting–as disgusting as cigarettes. YMMV and all that, but it is a dealbreaker. How could your make out partner NOT know? The taste is in your mouth, not to mention all the extra saliva–I’m gagging as I write this.
Thought of another one: talking to me about porn. Wanting me to watch porn. (upon first meeting or first month of knowing one another).
Oh, and guys who hit on me that live far away. Like, say, a different country. Tease!!
Interestingly, many, many women in Norway “dip” (as you say - around here the stuff is called “snus” and the verbal “snusing,” but I think I like the term “dip”), and many start as a result of quitting smoking, or even as a aid to quit smoking. Many men do it as well, of course, as it’s seen as better than smoking, and more self-contained, but I think the women top the charts.
As for the OP, I have newer been able to like someone who goes for categorized trends. I no longer have any such friends, and don’t make new ones. Not because I’m unfriendly or don’t talk to people like that, but because I consequently find them fascinatingly dull.
(By categorized trend, I mean fashion and lifestyle trends - goth, emo, punker, metalhead, skinheads, and the less obvious ones. Basically anything where a piece or set of clothing requires you to identify with a group, idea or mentality. Bluh.)
Hoo yeah, do I agree with this.
I was at a Talk Like a Pirate Day event last Wednesday, and started talking with the young woman next to me. She triggered several of my immediate-interest points: Looks good in pirate garb, compatible religion, technical/professional, certain common interests –
Then she pulled out a cigarette. My interest, which had been high enough to be a danger to myself, suddenly collapsed to zero.
Ack! Another presumption about a country I’ve long wanted to visit dashed! Do these women carry around cups to spit into? Is this done in restaurants or is it more an at home thing?
::GASP:: OOOOOOOOOhhhh! Some guy at a party I went to last weekend told me he was into dipping before he started smoking cigarettes, and I thought he was talking about doing dippers (cigarettes dipped in formaldehyde). No wonder he thought I was stupid when I said that I thought dipping was relatively recent (“Uh…dipping’s been around since the 1800’s”).
As gross as dipping is, it’s a lot less horrifying than doing dippers.
I have to second the hygiene things, and the men who have horrible spelling and grammar skills online. Also the dipping, which is quite possibly the grossest of all tobacco habits.
The other one that may not seem to be a big deal to the untrained ear is men who tell you within a few days of meeting them that they are, “a nice guy.” That immediately tells me to turn and run the other way because the only men I have ever met who needed to announce this (and there have been several) have ended up proving themselves to be douche bags within 48 hours of their niceness decree. When a man has to tell you he is a nice guy it is because he is not, in fact, nice at all.
I used to work with a Romanian lady. Classic gypsy-stock stunner with a great body and exotic accent. Definate fuel for fantasies I never had any intention of acting out. I knew she smoked, but the above was enough that I could not think about how nasty kissing her would be.
Then one day I was following her car the last couple of blocks into work. She finished her cigarette and flicked the butt out the window.
What a fucking pig!
I haven’t been in the market for over a quarter century (ulp)* but Hockey Monkey pretty much nailed it.
Except for the hairy back. What the hell is wrong with a hairy back?
I like hair. 
*(This just in … MARRIED FOLK STILL THINK ABOUT SEX. WITH OTHER PEOPLE. EVEN IF THEY DON’T, YOU KNOW, DO IT WITH ANYONE BUT THEIR SPOUSES.)
Not currently doing the “looking” thing either…
a) Bigotry. I remember logic class in college, where there was a fast-minded clever & very pretty gal who grasped each concept immediately, nice wry sense of humor, head chock-full of fascinating abstract thoughts… then one day in mid-sentence she started going on about “all these illegal immigrants” and “this is America these people are taking our jobs they don’t even speak English” and “bye bye to property values thanks to these people who don’t belong here in the first place”. Angry, mean, hateful, nasty, scowling. That ruined it. Aunt Petunia Dursley.
b) “You’re a guy, so of course I am going to have expectations of you that I would not hold myself to. Men and women are different, we do of course know those differences inside and out, so while on the one hand I am not going to treat you as I would wish to be treated, because we’re different and all, I also see no reason to explore any of this with you because I already know all about you, you’re a guy.”
c) Vapidity. Stupidity with vacuity. It’s actually a bigger turn-off when there’s technically an intelligence lurking there but the head is used only as a frame upon which to arrange her hair.
There are a lot of physical characteristics that are sort of a turn-off but more often than not I know someone pretty well from emails before I see what they look like; it’s really rare that I get involved with someone because of what they look like, and I’m not sure there are any singular phys characteristics that would be complete and utter dealbreakers. But
d) Use of makeup. If I can’t tell, I don’t know, but if I can tell, the reaction is probably at least as bad as hers would be if she discerned that I was wearing the stuff. Includes nail paint.
e) Hairlessness. Not that I would know, unless we’re meeting for the first time on the nude beach, but give me reason to think she’s shaved all her hairs off (except for the ones on her head, perhaps) and I’m going to want to go somewhere that she’s not.
f) The “Lookie, I’ve got big tits” thing. It’s a behavior in conjunction with a physical characteristic. Not sure I can explain it well, but it connotes a certainty that I am going to find her massive breastworks very fascinating. “Ooh do you want a chance to play with these, big boy?” Minus the behavior, not so much a turn-off as the absence of a turn-on (I like small), but with it, creepy.
[Hijack] It’s called “snoose” where I come from too (Montana) and also in the Dakotas where there was a large percentage of Norwegian settlers. But there’s no verb form, no “to snoose.” Dang, I haven’t heard “snoose” in years . . . .
[/Hijack]
Turn-offs for me:
- Baldness
- Facial hair
- Long hair
- Illegal drug use
- Fatness
- Extreme liberalism
- Strong regional accent
The dude must be a tall, muscular, dark-haired, crew cut conservative who’s twisted as a pretzel in private and drives like he’s qualifying. Drinking, smoking and general crabbiness are okay, too,