It’s late here so maybe I’m missing something, but why did you choose “No” for the “Do you have a Facebook account?” question? Isn’t the problem that you DO have a Facebook account, and your ex-girlfriend has taken control of it? You may want to try again but answer “Yes” to that first question.
Because answering “no” and the other options I chose is the only way to actually end up submitting a report.
Choose “yes” and answer the next question “This person is pretending to be me or a friend” and it just gives you links to help menus which describe processes I’ve already done.
OK, so I called the police and they made it quite clear they would not do this unless there was imminent danger of physical harm to someone. They did give me a fax number to a corporate office in Hamburg, which I guess I’ll try but obviously I’m not expecting much to come of that.
I wrote an email myself to that email address (records@facebook.com) and copied 4 other FB email addresses that are provided at that link that Roland Orzabal posted.
From the “records” address I got the following response:
From all the other email addresses:
I believe I’ve exhausted every option at this point. I simply can’t believe that there really is no process in place, no emergency contact protocol for such a situation. I suspect my lawyer will eventually get some results in his correspondences with FB after some weeks perhaps. But without a lawyer, someone could literally take over someone else’s account indefinitely.
I understand internet identity theft is a relatively new phenomenon. I’m quite sure 20 years from now there will be a sophisticated international legal system in place to deal with these things, if not sooner. We’re still living in the Wild West of the internet, and despite this incident part of me will most certainly look back at this time as the golden age of internet freedom. (I was in college in '93 which really was completely uncharted territory).
And the other part of me now thinks “holy fuck! this is a serious problem”. If I have time I’ll probably start a new thread in GD or GQ to discuss this. Questions like “can FB be help legally responsible for not providing an adequate process in recovering an account that has been taken over in this way?” and the more GD question "should there be such laws? (or do we just let the free market regulate such things?).
I don’t want to debate the latter here, but if anyone has any information on the legal question I would certainly be interested in hearing about that.
Do keep us posted on your lawsuit’s progress!
OK, so that impersonation report actually worked! The hacked profile was taken down.
I’m hoping that the language used (“removed this timeline from facebook”) does not mean “deleted” as I would certainly want to have access to the content again. At least she can’t do any more damage to me at this moment.
(I’m also concerned though that she will be informed though the fake email she set up and perhaps there will be some process where she could appeal this and have the account reactivated, but this should buy me some time anyway).
It’s a Christmas miracle!
Funny thing is she did all this on the day of the Mayan apocalypse. Wonder what huge cultural event the next major happening in this saga will coincide with?
(maybe a court date on Valentine’s Day?)
I assume the people you care about realized immediately that your account was hacked. I’ve had a few friends whose accounts were hacked, and “their” bizarre behavior was a huge tip that it wasn’t them.
My advice is to file a small claim against her for the return of your tablet. Mention in your complaint that she also hacked into your FB account. Just being served with a notice may be all that is necessary to get her to cease her behavior.
I’d sign up for Account Monitoring and Identity Theft service for several months to make sure she’s not doing something more nefarious. You say that she’s well off, but her behavior indicates a very angry, immature person who does not know how to handle rejection. Don’t assume she respects any boundaries.
If it is just your FB account that she hacked, consider yourself lucky. She’s sounds like a real nutcase.
Well, the nightmarish reign of terror is over it seems. Though I wouldn’t know how to even guess which particular report/protocol or which combinations of the many many things I did over the last 5 days actually lead to the results, the results are in. And I’m relieved to report that my original email was reinstated and my password reset. I’m back in now, with all the security info updated, and whatever more restricting measures I could find activated.
I’m looking forward now to talking with my lawyer tomorrow and finding out how to proceed with the legal case.
Interestingly, of the friends I was in contact with on this, I think very few if any of them actually saw what she posted in their news feeds. They all had to go onto my timeline to see it. I don’t really know much about the algorithms FB uses in deciding what makes it into the news feed and what doesn’t, but I can be relieved that this didn’t make the cut for the most part.
Well, I filed a police report, and I was advised by the police to send her a formal letter giving her 2 weeks to return it. After that, I’ll file a restraining order and the police would take action to retrieve the tablet (if I’ve understood correctly).
As a holder of a BA in psych, I would never use the word “nutcase” lightly. I have no reservations about using it here. In our fights over the last few months I have seen very scary things behind those eyes. On multiple occasions she’s gone from angry threats to crumbling like a helpless little child in moments. What you wrote about her behavior and lack of respect for boundaries is dead on (and it’s what had me so worried about these days when she had complete control of the FB account. There was much worse she could’ve actually done but the fact that she didn’t was more likely the result of her not thinking of it, rather then her drawing a line). I’ll stop here, but as I think I mentioned in the OP, I could easily write pages and pages detailing her psychological and emotional complexities and deficiencies, a big part of which would be about this incredibly bizarre, dysfunctional, love-less and hateful relationship she has with her fucked-up mom.
Anyway, I’ll update the thread, or perhaps start a new one, when I have something to report on the legal case.
Well, now that it’s been resurrected, is there an update?
They got back together and are expecting their second child in April.
Just kidding.
It is possible. The OP starts with him saying he broke up with his ex. Usually you break up with your girlfriend. Breaking up with your ex sounds like you are getting back together.
Wow, trip down (bad) memory lane seeing this resurrected. Would you believe me if I told you that this represented only the beginning of the trouble she ended up causing me?
I’ll give a very quick and dirty summary, but I could write pages and pages about it. First off some contextual info: I have ADHD and at that time I was getting my meds (amphetamine-based) from the US periodically while visiting the folks. (I wasn’t in the German health care system yet).
While in the US that summer (2013) for my sister’s wedding, late one night I got an email from my neighbor in Berlin. The cops came, with a warrant, and searched my place for drugs. They found and confiscated all my US orange pill bottles, most of which was allergy/asthma-type meds, but among those were also some adderall, dexedrine, and one pill of desoxyn (all amphetamine drugs that I’d been on at one time or another and were probably just sitting there for years in case I needed them). I also occasionally party a bit and so they also found a tiny little plastic bag pretty much empty with a tiny bit of MDMA residue in it which I’d long forgotten was even there, and a bit of hash.
Taking a step back:
There was a shortage of Dexedrine in the US that year (2012) and so I went back to Berlin without the meds in hand, and my parents sent them a few weeks later through the mail (I naively thought with all the prescribing info included that this would be legal. It’s not, but nothing criminal, just typically results in confiscation). She apparently read the emails my dad sent about the meds being on their way and called the police to tell them I’m sneaking in illegal drugs from the US. She also called customs control to alert them.
So I got charged with drug possession which made it all the way to court. Without the MDMA it probably would have been thrown out earlier, so she just got lucky. Charges were dropped if I agreed to 90 hours community service, which was less risky then going ahead with the trial. (she was present in the court ready to testify and who knows what she might have had up her sleeve. Incidentally this was summer of 2014 and was the first time I’d seen her in person since December 2012. There was this one strange scene where, after I agreed to the community service I was told to wait outside the courtroom while she was called in to be told her testimony wouldn’t be needed. She came down the long hall towards me averting her eyes as I stood in front of the door just unflinchingly staring at her as she walked past me into the courtroom. Just a notable scene which seemed worth mentioning).
Thought it was all finally over. A month later I get a letter from customs. They wanted me to come in for an interrogation. I didn’t even know that she called them up until this point. And this was a totally separate case from the other. I sent a letter explaining everything and got that resolved.
During the lead up to the court case I had misunderstood something my lawyer said about not being able to renew my visa while the case was ongoing. In my confusion I let my visa lapse, figuring I’d resolve the charge and then my lawyer would advise me afterwards on getting my visa renewed (yes, incredibly stupid on so many levels. I just wasn’t thinking straight during this time). When I did go to the immigration office I was told that all of my visa history (7 years at that point) would be voided and I’d have to start the whole process from null. Hard to explain the feeling at that moment - 7 years working your way through the system, gradually making this new country your home, and then suddenly feeling like a complete foreigner again.
So, after about 5 more visits over many months I got the documents I needed and got my visa again from step 1.
Shortly after that I got a letter that I was being charged with being in the country without legal stay. When I first went to the immigration office to tell them my visa had lapsed, apparently at that time that resulted in this charge. I wrote a letter explaining the story in detail, and they dropped it. I realize this has nothing to do with my ex directly but it was indirectly a consequence of this whole strange chapter of my life.
That was a really, really bad (almost) 2 years.
I kept this thread open just in case you stopped by to update us. You did NOT disappoint. Thanks you so much for explaining more. SO sorry you went through all this!
I’m hoping you’ll post at least once more to follow “That was a really, really bad (almost) 2 years”, with…" But I’m doing much better now. Let me tell you how well…"
As a fellow doper with “short-attention-span but too-long-patience-with-crazy-people”, I’m hoping you’re coping!"
Once you feel like hacked, you should immediate change your password and broadcast a message to all your Facebook friends of getting hacked. This is important for their safety as well. Update to Facebook as well.
What if you’re hacked by zombies?
Fast or slow?
Worst customer service response time ever.
Do not recommend.
If you’re getting hacked by zombies either they’re fast or you’re slow (or both)!
You don’t have to be faster than the ex-girlfriend, you just have to be faster than her latest ex-boyfriend.