Conspiracy Theories - Chinese Troops in Mexico

In My Humble Opinion
1

After looking over the ‘how much of a threat is North Korea’ thread, I decided to do a little bit of research on Chinese troops in North Korea. I went to google and typed in ‘Chinese troops in’ and google prompted me with, of all places, Mexico.

Ok, I used to read those things just for the entertainment value, so I took the suggested search.

:eek:

The sheer number of websites talking about this was incredible. Of course, they’re all looney tunes and not one of them has any hard and fast information, but holy shit, wow.

Oh, all these different bases, with tens of thousands of armored vehicles all lined up and hundreds of thousands of Chinese troops just waiting for us to build that supposed superhighway from Mexico to Canada, right? (What, I-35 not good enough? Pissed that it ends at Duluth or something?)

So…umm… How come none of you people can show me any of this shit on Google maps? How come you can’t give me anything but extremely vague locations, or no information at all? Hell, I can zoom google maps down to seeing dug in artillery positions in North Korea near Seoul. I can zoom in and see Chinese ships in dock at their naval base in Zahnjiang. I can zoom down and see all the armored vehicles, helicopters and military aircraft at Shahezhen Air Base near Beijing.

If you’re going to claim this shit exists, why can’t you show me on the map just there this is?

“Sixty miles SW of Loredo”. Might that be the Mexican Army base near Monterrey? No? You’re not confusing Mexicans with Chinese? Are you sure?

Of course, if all you dopers in Texas are overrun with Chinese troops one day, I’ll be the first to admit I was wrong.

Even if I laugh at the idea of 100,000 troops trying to march through a state filled with 26 million heavily armed civilians and several military bases.

2

I’ve never heard of this stupidity, but it’s in line with other Conservative idiotic thought like FEMA concentration camps, and the Amero (North American currency which would somehow, uh, ruin America, because uhhhh…)

Even 100k Chinese troops on the border wouldn’t be able to accomplish, uhhh, anything whatsoever to the U.S., what would be the point? It’s like someone who has no understanding of the military and modern warfare just made some crap up to scare the stupid.

That’s what being conservative is in a nutshell, finding stupid shit to be scared of.

3

I have a client who is a conspiracy theory loon: chemtrails, Truther, the usual. He is convinced the Chinese are massing for invasion from Canada. I try to avoid engaging him on these topics, as he is a good client that sends a lot of work my way, so I really don’t know where he got this particular claptrap.

4

On the other hand, it’s entertaining to imagine Chinese soldiers speaking Spanish with a Chinese accent… :smiley:

OK, it entertains me. Don’t judge.

5

Thanks for the visual image. Hundreds of thousands of Chinese soldiers wearing stereotypical Mexican garb with colorful ponchos and sombreros, desperately attempting to sound Mexican.

6

I’d rent that movie from Netflix.

I’d like a burrito to go please. With duck sauce…

7

In Illuminatus!, written in the mid-1970’s, there was a minor character who became convinced that all Mexicans had always been Chinese, and all Chinese had always been Communist. I don’t remember if it was Harold Canvera or another loony.
So I guess it’s not that new.

8

He’s Chinese, speaking Spanish, and played a soldier. Will this do?

9

It sounds like a rewrite of the famous WWI Zimmerman Telegram.
I’d like to see a remake of that stupid movie (“Red Dawn”) with the Chinese as the bad guys!
Wolverines!

10

I wonder if these people would freak out to learn that a battalion of Mexican Marines made it all the way to the other end of Texas unopposed in this very century…(*)

(*Part of the Katrina relief effort in 2005):slight_smile:

11

conspiraphobes tend to economize through consolidation, I think that’s one thing happening here. They’re afraid of the Chinese (Asian Menace), afraid of Mexico (little brown guy menace with special druglord craziness added), so they just combined them. Kind of like Obama is a Nazi AND a Communist.

But they all hate our freedom, that’s the key point.

12

Red Dawn remake. Originally China was the bad guy, but they re-edited and dubbed the film to make North Korea the bad guy, apparently out of fear of offending China. Hollywood is so brave!

13

I once heard *Guantonamera *sung in Korean. (Or howeverthehell its spelled.)