I think making fun of your SO is something that manifests itself later on in a relationship, when you’re in the comfortable stage. We know this couple - when they were dating, the guy was mad about the girl, who initially wasn’t giving him the time of day, but now they’re married and have two kids, and he constantly teases her in front of others - and sometimes it seems really mean (to me). He certainly didn’t start off the relationship like that.
I dunno; if the things listed here is the worst behaviour your spouse is subjecting you to, you’re doing pretty good. 
I’m not really sure how much of that script is Kipling’s (it’s been a long time since I read The Jungle Book), but go get Disney’s Jungle Book and watch with the SO that scene where Mogwli meets the vultures.
From memory and translating back from Spanish:
Vulture1: What we gonna do?
V2: Dunnow, what we gonna do?
V1: Heck I dunn… wait a minute, why are you asking me what we gonna do? I asked first what we gonna do! You always do this, I ask what we gonna do, then you ask what we gonna do, I don’t care what we gonna do but let’s do it already!
…
…
V3: Aaaaanyway. What we gonna do?
In Spain, answering a question with the same question is called “to act like a zopilote” (zopilote=vulture, in Mexican Spanish), referencing that scene. When someone does that, the standard response is “we’re not in The Jungle Book! I asked, what you do is answer!”
(To act like a buitre, buitre being vulture in Spain’s Spanish, is to borrow without intending to pay back)
I do occasionally ask myself that same question. When we first met I got hurt feelings over this habit of his. His entire family does it (though not to me because I’m the new comer in the family, they do it to each other). I’ve gotten used to it and weighed in the balance against his other qualities it’s a habit I can overlook. Lately, in self-defense, I’ll point out my blunder before he can. He still laughs but it’s less hurtful.
Of course he’s my third husband so maybe I just suck at choosing a good partner. 
Yeah, I have to agree. Though the “laughing at mispronouncing words” one would result in a long talk that would mostly consist of me saying “do not EVER do that again.” I think that’s the ONE behavior listed so far that I absolutely would not tolerate.
As for my boyfriend…he keeps asking me if I’m sure.
“So this shirt looks good on me?”
“Yup!”
“You sure?”
“Yes.”
“You’re SURE?”
“Yes.”
“Really?”
“YES.”
Then a few minutes later…
“You’re SURE this shirt looks good?”
“YES, FOR FUCK’S SAKE.”
Love the man to death, but christ…
Yeah, we would have had a discussion about that one long ago, with the result being it stops or the relationship stops. But, we don’t know what goes on with other people’s relationships; this might be the one fly in the ointment, and he’s a perfect mate otherwise, and velvetjones has decided that she can live with it.
My husband and I tease each other all the time; our teasing has a lot of history behind it, and if you just drop in in the middle of an exchange, you’d think that he’s one of the biggest assholes of all time (if you don’t see that I give as good as I get, and we both know each other’s senses of humour and where the limits are).
My husband has earned the nickname “one step” because he consistently takes things one step beyond being funny or appropriate. Then when he looks around and sees everyone looking at him like he is insane he says, “C’mon, that was funny!” Is this annoying? Of course. He puts up with my bullshit too though. I am a very picky eater and I have texture issues with food that make it difficult for me to just try something to see if I’ll like it. He, on the other hand, will eat almost anything you set in front of him without question. I’m sure it is difficult for him to live with someone who will only eat onions and mushrooms if they are diced so tiny that they aren’t noticeable when he would eat an onion like an apple if given the opportunity.
Despite these issues I don’t think I could have found a more perfect spouse and he has said more than once that he Forrest Gumped his way into this relationship. We are absolutely enamored with one another despite our negative traits. I think that most people here would probably say the same about their relationship too, even if their significant other has the occasional annoying habit.
Here’s a fun time:
“Have you seen my sneakers?”
“Have you looked in the bedroom?”
“Yes. They aren’t there.”
“Then I don’t know where they are.”
Was “yes” or “no” beyond her? Was she banking on the long shot, hoping that the one place she named would be the right place?
My husband is annoyingly sarcastic. It’s very hard to explain but if I ask him about something (especially something important or that is a touchy subject with me), he will give a long-winded response of exactly the opposite of what we need to do. He seems to think it is funny. Not when I am asking who should take care of our kids should something happen to us (for example).
The Look of Death has reduced this greatly.
Additional reductions were met recently when he told me that he discovered that his dad does the same thing. ‘It’s really annoying!’ he says to me. Yeah, no kidding.
Dear God, yes. This. Also, he stops talking in the middle of a story and goes to the bathroom, and then comes back and picks up where he left off. Then he goes down a conversational rabbit hole and drops off in the middle again and goes to change his shoes, and then comes back and picks it up. Then it’s going out to the garage fridge for a pop, or whatever. It can take an entire evening to tell a three-minute story, if you account for topical and physical wandering.
Sometimes I say, “PleasefortheloveofGodandbeforeIgoinsane, get to the end.” He’s a little insulted, but he does. Mostly I just stop paying attention, and then he’s hurt because I don’t remember his stories.
He’s a dear, wonderful, funny, loyal man, and the best father I know. I wouldn’t trade him for all the tea in China, but this habit does nearly send me screaming from the room.
This actually makes total sense to me; I say stuff like that all the time. “Have you looked in the bedroom?” is shorthand for “Well, the last place I remember seeing them was in the bedroom, but I’m not certain when that was, and I don’t want to send you on a wild goose chase if they’ve been moved since then. If they are still there, they’d be in plain sight, so… have you looked there already? If not, that’s where I’d send you, but if so, you would have seen them, so they must not be there.”
Yes, I could just say, “The last place I saw them was in the bedroom,” but then I risk getting the response, “Well, I just looked there, but thanks for nothing!” so it’s better to ask before making the suggestion.
That answer would be acceptable to me since it actually imparts information instead of making a blind stab at the correct location.
Exactly. Every possible pair of human beings will annoy each other at least a little bit. Hell, I annoy me a little bit sometimes. So even in the best relationships, we “round someone up to the one” (to steal a line from Dan Savage). Part of that “rounding up” process is learning how to ignore and deal with little annoying traits.
And some people deal by ranting to anonymous strangers on the internet. I often read these sorts of threads, write and delete a post, and that’s good enough for me to get an annoyance off my chest. (Personally I think this sort of ranting is necessary but not something you should regularly unload on friends, lest they only hear about your SO’s negative traits).
I’m not a violent person, but watching TV with my husband can move me to within inches of inflicting bodily harm. Whether we’re watching a comedy, a movie, sports, or even a commercial, if it features a man and a woman saying something or doing something, he’ll turn to me and ask “Is that what you think?” Or “Would you do that?” Or “Is that how you feel about me?”
I don’t know how to respond any more. It’s a show. It’s not my life. It’s not our life. Until I just this second saw it, I never even considered that situation. ShutUpShutUpSHUTUP!!! We’ve been married going on 28 years. He’s been doing this pretty much the entire time. I know sometimes he does it deliberately to yank my chain, but other times, he’s serious.
No, I never considered an affair with my boss. No, I wouldn’t poison your mother. No, I don’t think I’d hire a hitman to blow you up in your car… <headdesk>
I always tell the wife she’d be a horrible witness on the stand in a courtroom because she is incapable of answering the question asked:
Me: “Where did you buy this cheese?”
Her: “It was on sale.”
Me: “Are Humphrey and Agnes coming to dinner too?”
Her: “I called Agnes this morning.”
Me: “What time do you want to leave tomorrow?”
Her: “We have to pick up Poindexter on the way.”
mmm
My husband does this sometimes, even for yes/no questions, but that’s not the one that drives me most crazy.
For me it’s his inability to realize where my knowledge level is at when he tries to tell me an amusing story.
Me: How was your day?
Him: You will not believe the hilarious thing that happened! Jon was working on DHX-niner-17* and tried to replace the 4HQ 310 module with one that took into account the NTRY561090. But instead of writing it for the TRX 10687, he wrote it for the TRX 10689! Hahahaahahaah!
Me: …
Him: What?
Me: You realize that I understood none of that.
Him: Well, the TRX is like a GHNB9, only newer.
Me:* stabbing motion*
** insert name of computer-y thing here. *
“Hey love, where did you leave your car keys”
“In my purse”
“Okay… where is your purse”
“In the bedroom”
“Where in the bedroom?”
“Under my dresser”
“Okay there are like four purses in here, which one?”
“The black one”
“I am going to kill myself now”
Me: How did the shopping go for our patio party on Friday?
Mrs. Spiff: I went to the grocery store and I got the salad fixings, the cheese, the wine and beer, the crackers, everything I need to make the spinach dip, the bread, the cold cuts and all the paper plates and plastic utensils we’ll need. But can you believe it, they were totally out of [mumble, mumble]
Me: They were totally out of what?
Mrs. Spiff: I went to the grocery store and I got the salad fixings, the cheese, the wine and beer, the crackers, everything I need to make the spinach dip, the bread, the cold cuts and all the paper plates and plastic utensils we’ll need. But can you believe it, they were totally out of paper napkins.
I exaggerate, but only slightly.
A past SO was prone to say, ‘I knew you were going to say that’, always with a rather smug, triumphant air as if I to suggest that (a) I am sadly predictable and (b) the very fact of my being so predictable meant that she was right and my point was flawed.
I started pointing out that every person in the world, in every single conversation, could say ‘I knew you were going to say that’ at any time, and there would be no way to prove or disprove it. Unless she had some proof that she knew in advance, such as having had the foresight to write down my oh-so-predictable utterances on a bit of paper, I was entitled to view the claim with the same skepticism that she would express if I were to claim that she were being similarly predictable.
I also started pointing out that even if I granted what I had just said was predictable, this didn’t tell us anything about whether the point I’d made was valid or not. It’s possible to be predictable and entirely correct.
I also started pointing out that whereas she was harrumphing about my being predictable as if it were some sort of character defect, there are some cases where consistency is a virtue. What would she prefer - that I change my opinion or poiint of view every time, just to avoid the dreaded accusation of being predictable in her mind?
Making these points didn’t change anything. She still seemed to feel that it was a point worth scoring. I’ve met several other women with the same tendency. I find it curious.
My wife does that. I’ve learned that I need to be a bit more correspondingly long-winded in my question: “Ok, I got all of that except for the very last thing you said. What is it that they were out of?” Usually, that cues her to cut to the chase.
But if she starts into the story from the beginning again, I just interrupt: “I don’t need to hear the whole story again, just tell me what they were out of.”
I gotta say, most of the posts here just amaze me. Have you all been with your SOs for a couple of weeks?
A good relationship is give and take, and requires mutual understanding and communication. If your husband frequently interrupts you to point out your pronunciation mistakes, and you are unable to communicate to him that it seriously bothers you, then you’re not communicating very well. If you make that reasonably clear, and his response is that he can’t understand why you don’t think it’s as funny as he does, then he’s a bit immature and needs to be educated on the subject of “people are different.” If he understands that it seriously bothers you, but continues it anyway, then he needs some basic sensitivity education.
If your wife has habits that bug you, and you’ve made it clear that they bug you, but they’re so ingrained that she often/sometimes mindlessly falls into them, then she needs to be mature enough to not be sensitive when you point that out. For example, in my story above, when I interrupt my wife’s second telling of the whole story, she doesn’t get upset or “How dare you be so rude, don’t interrupt me!”, she goes, “Oh, right, sorry. They were out of paper napkins.”
My wife and I sometimes do the “Have you seen my sneakers?” bit, like Hypno-Toad. She doesn’t get upset because she’s learned that my answer is short hand for what Heart of Dorkness said. If the two people in a relationship aren’t learning enough about each other so that things that caused an argument in year one are now just accepted, what kind of a relationship do they have?