Cool girl: the trope that isn't

Spoilers for Gone Girl

Every now and then, somebody will post Amy Dunne’s the Cool Girl monologue from “Gone Girl” on Reddit or Tumblr or some other site (it is in both the book and the movie, albeit slightly different) and the post and comments will be full of “So true!” The comments section on the movie clip on YouTube isn’t much better either.

When you point out that Amy Dunne is a narcissistic psychopath and a murderer, the usual response is “Well yeah, but she is still right about this. She can be a bad person and still be right about something.” [Ignoring the fact tnat the monologue is highly subjective and it is supposed to encompass most of her character and her viewpoints. It is not like the psychopath saying “The Earth is round” or “You need air to survive”.]

When the movie first came out, most people seemed to agree that the monologue, even if it has some good points, is pretty biased and over the top, to say the least.

But over the last few years, it is like the world has gone mad.

https://np.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/iw007l/i_just_realized_that_i_have_spent_so_much_of_my/

1,637 votes and 106 comments so far on Reddit

https://commons.princeton.edu/gendersexualityandmedia/2019/01/15/cool-girls-only-the-modern-male-fantasy/

(the comments section)

The quote (from the book) is:

"Men always say that as the defining compliment, don’t they? She’s a cool girl. Being the Cool Girl means I am a hot, brilliant, funny woman who adores football, poker, dirty jokes, and burping, who plays video games, drinks cheap beer, loves threesomes and anal sex, and jams hot dogs and hamburgers into her mouth like she’s hosting the world’s biggest culinary gang bang while somehow maintaining a size 2, because Cool Girls are above all hot. Hot and understanding. Cool Girls never get angry; they only smile in a chagrined, loving manner and let their men do whatever they want. Go ahead, shit on me, I don’t mind, I’m the Cool Girl.

Men actually think this girl exists. Maybe they’re fooled because so many women are willing to pretend to be this girl. For a long time Cool Girl offended me. I used to see men – friends, coworkers, strangers – giddy over these awful pretender women, and I’d want to sit these men down and calmly say: You are not dating a woman, you are dating a woman who has watched too many movies written by socially awkward men who’d like to believe that this kind of woman exists and might kiss them. I’d want to grab the poor guy by his lapels or messenger bag and say: The bitch doesn’t really love chili dogs that much – no one loves chili dogs that much! And the Cool Girls are even more pathetic: They’re not even pretending to be the woman they want to be, they’re pretending to be the woman a man wants them to be. Oh, and if you’re not a Cool Girl, I beg you not to believe that your man doesn’t want the Cool Girl. It may be a slightly different version – maybe he’s a vegetarian, so Cool Girl loves seitan and is great with dogs; or maybe he’s a hipster artist, so Cool Girl is a tattooed, bespectacled nerd who loves comics. There are variations to the window dressing, but believe me, he wants Cool Girl, who is basically the girl who likes every fucking thing he likes and doesn’t ever complain. (How do you know you’re not Cool Girl? Because he says things like: “I like strong women.” If he says that to you, he will at some point fuck someone else. Because “I like strong women” is code for “I hate strong women.”)"

Here’s the thing. I’m a movie buff, I’ve watched thousands of movies and dozens of TV shows over the years. American, European, Asian and pretty much anything interesting. I even have a soft spot for Canadian cinematography (yes, that is a thing). And I don’t recall ever seeing the character that was a “cool girl”, as described by Amy. Not even in raunchy 80s sex comedies or edgy 90s teen movies (most of them written and directed entirely by men, with a bunch of sexual/controversial/gross/offensive jokes). There have been some female characters that are generally carefree and hypersexual, which many men find appealing, but nothing like the specific, over the top example described there. TV Tropes doesn’t have a page on it either, which is really saying something. TV Tropes does have a page on “Not like the other girls” trope, but it is still very different from “Cool girl”.

Even the essay linked above mentions like three movies, and none of them actually fit the criteria. The video essay uses Mila Kunis’ character in “Friends with Benefits” as one of the “examples”, because she… drinks beer and makes jokes? And claims that men use the trope to pit women against each other?

I’m sure there are women like “cool girl” (or similar) in real life, and men who fantasize about them and even seek them out. But it is not some common archetype/trope that is constantly promoted or pushed in society. Otherwise we would actually be seeing it in the popular culture. It literally does not happen, not even in movies that are obviously male fantasy.

That is also not specific to men. Women also have the fantasy of ideal men that does not match reality. You can only say that it is more common with men because most of them are more sexually inclined than women and are more of a visual type in general.

The ideal man fantasy won’t be as specific or ever the top (at least in most cases), but neither are all male fantasies. Every guy has his own fantasy/idea of a perfect girlfriend, and not all of them will want a girl who is exactly like them and wants to have sex all the time.

To be clear, the monologue itself isn’t saying any of that. But people who actually agree with it do, directly and indirectly. And it is absolutely baffling. They literally agree with a delusional psychopath. People are actually writing articles about deconstructing a trope that doesn’t even exist.

“Cool girl” monologue is the kind of thing that makes you go “Huh, this is kind of true” when you first hear/read it, but when you actually think about it, you say “No, not really”. Apparently, some people skipped the second part.

Dee from It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia is a “cool girl” as described, but all the other characters hate her, as she is also a terrible person. But they, too, are terrible people. The other main characters definitely don’t like to see her succeed or be right or be strong, but she sometimes is successful/right/strong and that drives them crazy. So if she’s as much of a loser as them, they hate her because nobody likes a loser. And if she is better than them, they hate her too because losers don’t like winners.

I think it is more true than the opposite premise - that men would prefer women who are very unlike themselves. However, both premises are so broad that no matter what a particular man’s preference is, you could either complain that he wants an exact copy of himself or some ideal of femininity, even if he doesn’t really.

Alyna from Chad Kultgen’s novel The Average American Male would seem to fit the bill.

This is the part that makes me raise an eyebrow. So the “Cool Girl” can really be anything? So, basically, if you’re a woman that a man likes, you’re just a poseur “Cool Girl” that’s faking it? No matter what it is you’re doing?

Well, okay then, might as well just give up on this whole “human race” thing we’ve got going.

You are not dating a woman, you are dating a woman who has watched too many movies written by socially awkward men who’d like to believe that this kind of woman exists and might kiss them.

I never understood the Joss Whedon fandom. I mean, to be fair, maybe one day men and women will become largely indistinguishable from one another in terms of personality, interests, and proclivities, as society changes and cultural norms adjust, but I’m not sure that - at the moment - writing a male part for someone like a young Bruce Willis and casting a skinny, female model in the part is doing much more than being a lazy writer and demonstrating a strange desire for a male partner in a woman’s body.

In a similar vein, my wife and I are currently going through 2 Broke Girls and we both can’t help but note that the show is clearly written by a group of men. It feels like the actresses could have pushed back more on how everyone interacts with one another.

It is a monologue by a delusional psychopath, so it is not supposed to make sense. The problem is that many people seem to agree with it.

Buffy was supposed to be a subversion of a specific trope: blonde, petite valley girl, the kind that gets killed off quickly in horror movies. (Ironically, that is what happens to Sarah Michelle Gellar’s character in “Scream 2”. Her character also gets killed off in “I know What You Did Last Summer”, but it happens at the end and she put up a fight then.) But in “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” she fights monsters instead. “I am the thing monsters have nightmares about.” It is also explained that Slayers have supernatural strength, so that explains it. But the final girl trope existed way before Buffy, just not with that type of girl.

Also, the show wasn’t just popular because of Buffy kicking ass. The draw was also the theme of teenagers growing up in an overly mature world full of vampires, werewolves, monsters etc. And successfully combining genres like horror, thriller, mystery, drama, romance etc.

Yeah, I mean, sexy women who like things that guys like exist, but that’s a far cry from the very specific chili dog aficionado described.

I honestly don’t know what the point of the rant is even supposed to be? Women that men are attracted to are all fake? All men who fantasize about a woman who likes what they like are fools? Manipulators? Women don’t actually like sex or food?

I mean, it’s emotional, vague, righteous, convoluted, and inscrutable. Sounds like a narcissist psychopath to me. The writer nailed it, but I’m not sure what the public is latching onto here.

Might help if I read the book.

I won’t weigh in on how true Dunne’s monologue is for all women. However, this dude has in the past pretended to be the amiable pet described in order to make his significant other happy to my own detriment.

I would argue it’s part of maturing, the transition in the 20’s or early 30’s after a few relationships under the belt when a person goes from ‘How do I attract a person that will make me happy?’ to ‘How do I protect my boundaries in this relationship?’ A person pretending to be the ‘cool girl’ or a person looking for that is not ready for a serious commitment.

I don’t know, she’s pretty much the opposite of this part:

Remember the time her stripper boyfriend pissed her off and she tricked him into grinding his crotch into his own daughter’s face?

No, the “Cool Girl” is exactly like you — she likes whatever you like, she enjoys doing whatever you enjoy doing, and she doesn’t ever want to talk about feelings or other icky stuff.

Yes, I know that the author put the monologue into the mouth of a psychopath, but I — a 60-something male, FWIW — see a lot of truth in it.

The key to understanding “Cool Girl” is to think about what might prompt a guy’s friend to say, “Dude, your girlfriend is so cool!”

“She wanted to go to the monster truck rally with me.”
“I stayed out all night, and instead of yelling at me, she made me breakfast.”
“She told me I could stay home while she went to her grandmother’s birthday dinner.”
“She didn’t complain when my friend puked all over the bathroom floor.”
“I forgot our anniversary, but she didn’t mind.”

Basically, a “Cool Girl” is an attractive companion who lets the guy do whatever he wants to do all the time, and even enjoys doing it with him — unless it’s a “guy thing,” in which case she sits patiently waiting for him to come home.

It seems that “Cool girl” is just shorthand for Your Fantasy Girl. Or even Your Completely Unrealistic Fantasy Girl. The one who is always smokin’ hot and yet never has to do her hair or makeup because that would be inconvenient. I think the gist of the OP rant is simply that men are scum because they think that women should be always catering to the men’s needs and desires with no life beyond that. A Stepford Girlfriend. There’s a lot of truth to that but it categorically denies that maybe there are some women who like guys stuff. Non, she couldn’t possibly be interested in play Call of Duty! She is just doing it to make you happy!

What We Do in the Shadows has a fun inversion of this trope in the most recent season. Nandor wishes for his wife to like all the same things he likes. Only to discover how incredibly boring that is.

I wouldn’t call that a “cool” girl, I’d call that a door mat. ETA: Except for the Monster Truck part, that’s cool. Which, admittedly, is something a lot of guys seem to want.

But I also know quite a few women who are into “guy things”, who would also kick your ass if a man tried to pull this bullshit on them.

Nandor get married?!?!

(We’re only on season 3.)

I’m 40, but I never described or heard a woman described as “cool” for being a fake, mindless pushover. Generally, people I’ve known call women cool when they think they are cool.

Sure, idiots are going to think people are cool for idiotic reasons, so I guess some of them are out there. But are women really playing video games, having threesomes and eating massive quantities of hot dogs just for male approval? Which women?

Are you sure you’re not projecting, or having a sour grapes moment? (Royal “you” here.) How do you know whether someone really likes something, or just pretends to for external validation? Seems like the No True Coolgirl fallacy or something.

I mean, women have a lot of shit to overcome in society, and I’ve seen a variety of ways of coping with that. But I just haven’t seen this particular phenomenon. I’m not a gamer or competitive eater, so maybe I just don’t run in those circles?

There’s a large gap between “likes to play Call of Duty” and “enjoys doing everything you do and never asks you to do anything you don’t want to.”

You’re right, she does fail to meet all the criteria. The case for Dee breaks down when she’s also expected to not give a shit (although to be fair to Dee she matches the way the guys over-react to things!)