Create your very own shameless product tie-in

That’s right folks, step right up and make yourself rich. Don’t be shy, you can do it! Cast off all sense of decency and become the sell-out you secretly long to be.

My humble contribution:

Survivor, coming soon for Playstation 2! Includes everything you’d come to expect from a pathetic knockoff game from the much beloved “reality” show:

  • Choose your luxury item from an extensive list, including:

    • 12 pack of Budweiser
    • $100 gift certificate to Amazon
    • Daisy Red Rider BB gun
    • 2 Victor rat traps
  • Attractive people in various states of [sub]Playboy[/sub] undress.

  • Hours of loungeing around listening to banal conversation about alliances, Uncle Ben’s rice, and tapioca in beautiful DVD video and DTS.

  • Semi-attractive people in various states of [sub]Penthouse[/sub] undress.

  • Immunity challenges where the winner gets to be innoculated against the local water-borne parasites. (Apparently there was some sort of miscommunication in the design phase…) Challenges include the exciting:

    • Eat the bugs (sponsored by Taco Bell)
    • Shoot balloons with Crosman slingshots
    • Search for stuff that one might buy at Land’s End
    • The Nike beach race
  • Downright ugly people in various states of [sub]Gold’s Gym[/sub] undress.

  • And of course, the Tribal Council, where each time you vote one contestant off the island and twelve more product endorsements on.

Retails for a mere $54.95 at your local Electronics Boutique, and the Survivor’s Strategy Guide is also available for just $19.95! Don’t forget to pick up the action figures!