Creepiest possibly slash pairings

Suggested by my initial misreading of this post.

I’m using “slash” in the broadest sense of any romantic pairings between characters not romatnically involved in canon; in other words, whether it’s gay or straight doesn’t matter.

I misread the linked post as suggesting a romantic relationship between Buffy & Giles, which would be wrong in at least four different ways. But I’m sure you guys can think of far, far wronger.

Barbara Gordon & Joker - comics continuity. I doubt anyone can beat that. (I actually inspired someone to write that. It’s dubious consent though.)

The only possible worse one would be Jason Todd & the Joker (which I so want someone to write. Seriously. Pre & Post Death in the Family)

Some of us would say that the former pairing actually did occur in continuity, just not on panel. Had that story been created in the past few years…well…Sue Dibney.

There’s all kinds of Jon Stewart/Stephen Colbert stuff out there (or so I heard).

Alan Moore says it didn’t, not that that’s 100% proof.

Oh, and Snarf / Slythe might be creepier. Or at least more disgusting.

Alan Moore is a delusional psychopath with delusions of grandeur; he lies so frequently that his need to do so is doubtlessly pathological; and he has been plotting to conquer destroy New Zealand, conquer Earth, and enslave all of humanity for years…

Wait, that’s me. Never midnd.

The Swedish Chef/Lou Zealand



I had a coworker who was obsessed with that pairing and read every fic involving it that she could get her hands on. Making it even creepier, this all took place in 2002.

Why is that creepier?

Presumably because in the books that were out by 2002, Hermione was only 14 or 15 at most.

I mean what’s so creepy about 2002, in this context, by the by.

As of 2002, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire was the most recent book published, in which Hermione is 14. The film version of Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone had come out the year before, in which she is 11.

I don’t know what age Hermione was supposed to be in the fic, but at the time she was very firmly envisioned as a child in my mind.

Once while I was surfing the internet (never you mind about what) I found a webpage with a collection of links for every possible pairing they could think of in Lord of the Rings.

The most distressing I found was either Boromir/Faramir (not at all surprising, considering slashficcers) or Gandalf/Beorn. You know. The guy in The Hobbit who turns into a bear.

There may have been honey involved.


I know of an even worse Narnia pairing, but I’ll keep it to myself.

By 2002 in the books, Hermione would have been in her mid-20s. The books are set in the 90s (though Rowling has made a few mistakes and inserted anachronisms because the books were being written in the 2000s).

Being involved in the fandom for Powerpuff Girls Z (the anime reimagining of Powerpuff Girls) has lead to encountering some odd pairings from the original series.

I 'ship Miyako Gotokuji and Kaoru Matsubara - the PPGZ equivalents to Bubbles and Buttercup. Unexpected result of that…discovering Original PPG Bubbles/Buttercup 'shippers. :eek: Preschool incest is not something I’d expected to encounter in PPG fandom. :eek:

I probably shouldn’t speak…I’ve done the inevitable drug-use fic with the OPPG…


And no, it never leaves your nightmares.

Tara/Warren is about the wrongest I can imagine in the Buffyverse (note that the actress who plays Tara did/does date the actor who played Warren!), but that’s only because Connor/Cordelia is in canon. Bleah!

[obsessive fan]15. Hermione turns 15 early in September of fourth year.[/obsessive fan]

Anyway, I can easily top Hermione/Snape.

Hermione/Lockhart or Ginny/Tom Riddle are both way, way creepier.

Repeat after me. That was not Cordelia. That was not Cordelia. THAT WAS NOT CORDELIA!

Cordelia’s primary value to Angel, above even the visions, is that she was the sane member of the group. Fucking her almost-son tain’t sane. That was the verifiably-nutjobbish Jasmine.