This week Cristi Lamb unexpectedly – shockingly – died. I still cannot comprehend how someone with such energy, enthusiasm and verve is not still among us.
Cristi left behind two children, Johnzilla and the Dianasaur. She used those names when she was describing their antics, with the image that these perfectly normal kids were (as kids so often are) alien monsters causing irrational rampaging destruction. Amusing stories of their goofiness aside, and without getting too far into cliche, Cristi delighted in them and was always trying to figure out how she could give them their best possible future. Of all of the consequences of her death, the worst is that these children will grow up with only most limited memories of the extraordinary woman that was their mother.
Cristi had a stepson, Timi, her husband’s son, who sometimes lived with them. She took great joy in having him around and trying to be a point of stability in his often chaotic life. She also had another natural daughter that she had given up, but remained involved with through an open adoption. Cristi’s stories of them showed how she tried to fit them into her family and provide what guidance she could through her typical warmth, caring, and natural desire to help others.
Cristi lived in and worked for the City of Flint, Michigan. Reading her tales of quirky co-workers and annoying customers you were always left with the impression that the thing she loved best about her job was the fact that she could often help her customers resolve the tangles they brought to her.
I am one of the many friends she made through the internet. Cristi, known online as Persephone, was a storyteller and advice giver in our online community. Her stories were usually light and amusing and her advice was always set firmly in reality and common sense. When she saw an issue she cared about, however, she could passionately advocate for her point of view.
I know her best from the times she visited New York. From the first time she arrived she fell in love with the City. It was exhilarating to see someone draw such excitement and energy from all of the little things that New Yorkers take for granted. Whenever she came back, she would exclaim how “geeked” she was to be in New York and how someday, somehow, she would find a way to live in the City. Sadly, that dream, along with so many others, will now never be realized.
Cristi was never afraid to show her personal vulnerabilities, which was a measure of her inner strength. She would share her failures as readily as her triumphs, always with charm and grace. Through her openness, she was able to forge a personal connection to so many of us who knew her mainly through words over wires.
Those of us who knew her, in whatever medium, were privileged to share the little time we had together. However we interacted with her, she made our lives brighter, and we are all diminished now that she is gone.
I’m very sorry to hear this. We say, IJAFIBB, but no, it really isn’t.
Because I, myself, recently had surgery, albeit less major than a hysterectomy, and when I saw her thread, I was like, “Oh, yes, I know exactly what you’re talking about!” How thoughtful of her to share her experience with it, making others facing surgery or the pain of surgery feel that they are not alone. That she gives people here the opportunity to take comfort by reading of her experience with surgery tells me that she must have been an empathic person, sort of like an e-mom, someone who would probably listen to you and make you feel better about life.