Critique my pirate poem

Cafe Society
1

I just wrote this poem like five minutes ago and it’s basically the first poem I have ever written. My friend sent me a pirate poem about general raping and pillaging and I wrote this as a reply. We’re kind of in a pirate phase at the moment.

The Buccaneer Princess

Peek up a fair maidens dress
And Chain her with a horses harness
Bring her on back with the ferry
In the ships galley she’ll make us merry
Fill our bellies with wine and meat
Then bring her on back for a sweeter treat
Soon she’ll be singing that foul pirate song
She’s has found the fabled place a wild girl belong

Spanish doubloons, silver and gold
Never there was a pirate maiden so bold
A skull on her hat and a gun down her panties
Singing along to those old sea shanties
With powder keg breasts and a knife in her teeth
With a zip and clash her saber unsheathe
Sailors falling left and right
Rotting away in that damp Sargasso night

So is it any good? For a pirate poem I mean? Please feel free to add your own.

2

As a fellow friend going through a pirate-phase, I applaud your delightful pirate poetry.

3

It makes no sense at all.
It’s so terrible, I didn’t make it too far down before stopping.
The pure wretchedness … I’m hardly getting over it.
I don’t know for sure if you’re an idiot or just a bad poet.
You should be sorry, somehow, for the pain you’ve caused me.
I’m all tensed up, remembering how bad it was.
Whatever made you think you could write poetry?
Do you remember how to use proper punctuation?
I bet you don’t have a life.

:slight_smile:

4

Aargh! Sounds like a lass I want to make me walk the plank. Aargh!