That’s not what I meant at all. I say she’s selfish, whoring around, and seeking sexual attention because that’s the truth. She’s not a “loner” by choice, she’s alone because no one can stand her, male or female. She hates other women because she thinks they take attention from her, which they do because almost anyone is better looking/acting than her. She WANTS friends, she just doesn’t know how to treat them when she gets them. Several people, including myself, have befriended her out of sympathy only to get burned.
She told my boyfriend he was gay because he wouldn’t go home with her one night when she begged him. He had to physically push her away so she would get out of his face. This happened while I was in the bathroom. I was gone for maybe 3 minutes. I come out, he’s shaking his head and making a face at her. Wtf?
I have always been popular with the guys, so my hatred of this person has nothing to do with her taking anything away from me. Believe me, no one would be jealous or threatened by this woman. She is disgusting. In fact, it was one of our guy friends who started referring to her as “puke breath,” the “Broad Ripple cum tank” is one of her other nicknames.
Plenty of women who hang out with mostly guys do NOT act like this woman. I am by no means painting with a broad brush. I’m talking about one person.
So you performed her psychoanalysis when, exactly? And you got your PhD where? Just curious, because it’s very easy to project motives on others when we don’t understand why they would act the way they do. You say she’s got a problem keeping friends, yet you yourself only befriended her out of sympathy? See, it’s people like you that give others a bad idea of what friendship is about. Nobody wants your pity. No wonder she doesn’t treat you like a friend.
Yeah, because that’s definitely something to be proud of, something to bolster your self image with.
Hm. Seems you’re spending an awful lot of time, effort, and invective on someone you’re not jealous or threatened by. Just seems to me if she’s really all that vile, you’d just turn a blind eye and move on.
I completely agree with you, and I don’t mean to insinuate that that’s what you were doing. But it’s strange that you would use that as a reason that you dislike her. I don’t think that that particular quality, in and of itself, is worthy of earning your scorn, unless you are so insecure with yourself as a woman that you can’t deal with women who don’t fit the ‘normal’ mold.
No, I didn’t perform her psychoanalysis. I guess you’d just have to meet her to see what I’m talking about. I believe she does indeed have severe mental problems, but of course, that’s just a guess.
I gave her a bad idea of friendship? Bullshit. Are you going to be friends with someone who attempts to fuck your boyfriend the minute you walk out of the room? She did this to two of her supposed friends. And, as I said before, she attempted to manhandle my boyfriend when I went to the bathroom. She did this in front of at least 5 people, so I have it on good authority that he wasn’t instigating it. He had to tell her several times to leave him alone, and he still had to push her (gently) so she would get her stink breath out of his face. Like I said, I come out of the bathroom to him shaking his head and saying to me, “You’re not going to believe what puke breath just tried on me.”
I don’t know exactly why it makes me so mad. There is no rhyme or reason to it. Maybe it’s the lack of respect she shows to just about everyone she’s ever around. Her roommate just had to throw her out because of all the shit she pulls. She’s had to stop hanging out at two different clubs because she is so widely hated and distrusted. It’s not as if this has all happened for no reason. She is a toxic person who doesn’t know how to treat people. She has no sense of morality.
What’s with the personal attack? I say I’m popular and you make a snide comment? Didn’t you just say you are friends with mostly guys? I have many many people that I consider not just friends, but family. And, yeah, that makes me feel pretty fucking good. This girl could have been a part of that if she could have just restrained herself and shown a little respect. Our group is very accepting of people, our only requirement is that you treat others as you would want to be treated. And that’s the honest truth.
Solution: A) whine about it and call her a whore
B) Never place yourself in a situation where you will have to be in her presence
C) Trust your boyfriend to act like an adult and rebuff her advances
Now, which one makes more sense?
I never attacked you personally, hon. Just curious why you’re getting your knickers in a twist over someone who is obviously not worth it, and why you seemingly condemned one of her behaviors that didn’t seem to warrant it.
Well. I actually have quite a few gay male friends. The benefits that I get out of hanging around these people are:
I enjoy their company.
They are nice people.
We have common interests.
They are fun to be with.
Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.
Also, for what it’s worth, my mom is a woman hater. She’s always made a point of making sure that I know that women will stab you in the back, make lousey friends, will steal your man etc.
She’s now close to 60. She has almost no friends. I cannot imagine what sort of horror show is going to ensue if my father dies before her.
From my experience, you reap what you sow. Every person in this thread that’s claiming that women are lame to hang around with, or women who only hang around with guys are losers, or women who have gay male friends are avoiding sexual tension are doing themselves a great disservice.
As a final note. I have many female friends. Some of them are girly. Some of them are not. Fortunatly, I’m diverse enough in my interests that I can get along with all of them. Generally speaking, I think this is true of just about anyone.
If you assume that you won’t like hanging out with women, then geuss what - you probably won’t. This has nothing to do with the women, and everything to do with you.
Unless you’re a lesbian, I can’t imagine they really wanted you at a bachelor party unless it was pretty tame. I’ve heard of some combined bachelor/bachelorette parties before, sans bawdy attitudes and strippers, but if this was a “real” bachelor party I don’t understand why they’d take a straight woman along. I suspect these guys may just be too nice to nudge you out when they’re doing “guy things.” In fact, why you would want to be at a bachelor party is baffling. I’m a guy, and I don’t go to strip clubs, what you as a straight woman could be getting out of that I don’t know. Maybe you should consider whether you’re tagging along as a third wheel on some of these things. Because you’re a girl, the guys will probably be too nice to just tell you you’re unwanted. Yeah, yeah, you know these people and I don’t, but it sure sounds like you may be assessing the situation incorrectly.
I don’t care how many shared interests you have, you’re still a girl and they’re still guys. My group of friends also had a female pal who we sometimes joked with saying “wait, you’re a girl?” But it stopped at joking, nobody really thought that, because gender is always there, it’s always present, it’s just that sometimes it operates below the surface. (See stonebow’s excellent remarks, among other things, guys will look out for their female acquaintance in situations that they’d just trust their guy friend to get himself out of.)
Well, I’m a guy, but I’m an regular viewer of Days of Our Lives and I play bridge, two typically “female” things to do (no offense to Bobby Wolfe.) There is some mixing between typically “male” interests and “female” interests. But just because you don’t share most of the “female” interests doesn’t mean that you can just sign up to be one of the boys. As people have pointed out, there are stereotypical ways in which women treat each other and in which men treat each other, but that doesn’t necessarily extend to a guy hanging with a group of women or a girl hanging with a group of guys. Liking sports doesn’t magically give you a penis anymore than playing bridge magically transforms me into a 60-year-old woman. No matter how many interests you share, you’re always something of an outsider.
And by shunning your own gender, you’re exacerbating the problem, you’re becoming part of the problem. Do you realize there have been several women in this thread who mentioned that they don’t like all the drama and gossip of the typical female friendship? Instead of assuming that means you should just hang out with men all the time, have you considered that other women like you might make good friends? Just an idea.
No shit. My point exactly. Men and women can share and overlap interests, but there still remain those that will be predominantly male or female. Your liking what you consider typical female activities is a perfect example. You failed to share, however, how many of your male friends join you in these activities.
Please point me to where I ever said that I considered myself to be ‘one of the boys’. I am most certainly not a tomboy, by any stretch of the imagination. Neither do I consider myself ‘one of the boys’. I simply said that most of the friendships I formed happened to be with boys rather than girls. I’ve had female friendships over the years, plenty of them. The difference is, those friendships failed while the ones with boys did not.
I’m glad you’re up on your biology lessons. I don’t subscribe to the Freudian theory of penis envy, so I really don’t know what point you hoped to make with that statement.
Yes, and I never claimed to be otherwise. I’m quite happy being on the outside. I find it gives me a much better perspective.
I’ve never shunned anyone, hon. I’ve just come to realize that friendships with females are a lot more trouble than anything else. The females I can call friends are few and far between. Women, in my experience, tend to seek out ‘friendship’ for the wrong reasons. They look to compare themselves to someone else, or use their friends as a crutch for their own insecurities. I’m sorry, but I really don’t want to babysit someone’s ego in return for hearing the latest office gossip.
Yes, and I’ve also noticed that in real life, many of those who complain about other’s gossipy, dramatic behavior are oftentimes the worst offenders themselves. All talk, baby. I’m not saying that’s true of any individual here, but you have to take these things with a grain of salt.
Again, never once have I said I sought out friendships with men over women, that’s just the way it worked. See, two girls who usually hang out by themselves and leer at the gossipy clique of bitches in the hall usually aren’t going to bump into one another someday and go, “Oh, you can’t stand that either? Let’s hang out!” We usually just avoid the type of people whose behavior we find unacceptable, and live our lives without giving it a second thought. Friendships with guys come easier. If I’m reading a comic book, a guy will come up to me and remark on it. Girls usually don’t.
You see, the reason I disdain much of what friendships with women entail is because I myself am a woman, and as such, I know what the capabilities of women are with respect to catty behavior and such. I never said I was completely innocent of these behaviors myself, either. But I have made a firm resolution not to engage in them. I’m not part of the problem because I’ve recognized the problem for what it is. Most women aren’t comfortable enough with their sense of self to be a good friend to anybody. I can’t speculate on the nature of men and friendships, as I’m not one and haven’t experienced life as such. I can however, say with great certainty that the women I’ve met who are secure in their sense of self are some of my best friends.
I being a woman never understand why women don’t like having another woman for a friend.
If you are a true friend to someone it makes no difference if you are man or woman.
I have a hard time with women not cause I have a problem being their friend but they have a problem being mine.
I just hope there is enough men to go around for all you women that hate women.
I guess I still don’t understand. Seems to me that it would be completely unacceptable to say something like “most black people aren’t comfortable enough with their sense of self to be a good friend to anybody,” so what makes it okay to say that about women? Why is it okay to make blanket statements about the whole gender?
I don’t subscribe to the Freudian theory of penis envy, so I really don’t know what point you hoped to make with that statement.