Actually, I think it’s worse than that. I’m pretty sure the commercial says “You can’t pass inspection with pieces left behind.” The spouse and I have speculated before that, like most of this horrible commercial series, the TP “pieces” are actually a metaphor for…something else.
So basically they’re telling you that you should use their product because if you don’t, you’ll walk away with dingleberries stuck to your ass.
Yeah, give me a lot of that. :rolleyes:
The Toyota commercials with “regular, every day, ordinary” Americans. Which basically means they’re obese and talk about working hard for a living. Every single one of them is obese and they’re sitting on a couch while doing the commercial.
A DUI arrest turns men into boys.
If you seen it, you know. The authoritarian asshole voice-over is bad enough, but apparently only men drive under the influence.
I’ll be glad when they either stop making Bing ads, or at least make different ones.
Really? The same State Farm company that denied all those claims after Katrina? It’s like the Exxon commercials after the Valdez spill, trying to be all warm and fuzzy. I always mute those, as it’s my only revenge on the bastards.
Technically, the delivery guys are for Miller High Life, not Miller Lite.
Those ads scare me. Kind of like the movie “The Happening” but, you know, scary.
There’s a really obnoxious snoring ad, dunno what the product is as I switch it off as fast as I possibly can.
The one where people are looking at shelves full of analgesics trying to decide which one to buy and their paramount, most important, number one criteria is “how many pills will I have to take”.
God forbid you might have to take 2 every 4 hours instead of one every 6. That’s sooo much more important than price, safety, and effectiveness.
Probably one of the two NyQuil commercials featuring football players.
I’m adding my voice to the “I hate the Charmin commercial” contingent. Not only is the whole concept disgusting but it’s just plain stupid. Bears don’t use toliet paper. Sheesh, people.
I’m not the target audience for these - but there’s some series of beer ads where the beer orderer is not sufficiently specific about his choice of beer, and the waitress insults him. The point of the ad is supposedly “drink our beer, so you won’t be humiliated” when it’s actually conveying “drink some other beer, and you’ll have a really good excuse for not tipping the bitch behind the bar.”
While watching those ads I always wonder, will the people stay like zombies until they die because they’ll just stay in place, not moving for food, drink, sleep, or going to the bathroom?
He went to Jared!
(The worst. Always and forever.)
The Orbit commercial(s) with the ditzy blond British girl who has unnaturally white teeth.
ETA: Ditto on the Jared ad. Blech.
Yeah, I know, they all suck, but that one in particular bothers me the most.
I will admit to not liking thunderstorms myself (thunder makes me jumpy), but the fear isn’t so crippling that I have to run into my man’s arms every time I see lightning. I put on my big girl panties and deal with it.
That Trojan vibrator ad really makes my sack sweat. A new bride is getting a shower by some of her friends, and a few of them apparently have given her the aforesaid vibe. And it’s not just the expected girlish giggles that annoy me, (Oh my gawd it’s a VIBRATOR! TeeHee!) it’s the groom-to-be’s reaction. He’s far, far too excited that his fiancee got a vibe for a gift. It’s like, “ALRIGHT! I don’t have to worry that I can’t bring my wife to orgasm anymore! I’m going to go masturabate now!” Ugh
There’s a commercial right now for Kohl’s (a store I generally like) in which a smug woman is talking about her family’s gift exchange, for which they drew names. “The rule was one gift each,” she says, “but with all the money I saved, I had to break the rules.”
NO YOU DIDN’T, YOU FUCKING TWATHAMMER. People like you are why drawing names sucks a bowl of dicks in some families*. If the rule was one gift each, buy one goddamned gift! If you saved money, good for you!
Has anybody mentioned those idiotic Toyota ads with the has-been celebratoids? Eric Estrada!! I thought you were in a halfway house!! Seriously, could they not dredge up somebody at least remotely current instead of raiding the crypts?
The one for some Lysol product or whatever that’s all about the horrors of touching a dirty soap pump.
Oh God, don’t let the children near it!
Listen up, asshats. If you are touching the soap pump, it’s because you’re about to WASH YOUR FUCKING HANDS!!!1!
That commercial makes me want to bash my head against the wall.