Commericals that bother you for silly reasons.

There’s this commercial for home postal service-- stamps. com maybe?-- where people give testimonials. One guy says “There’s nothing worse than going to the post office and waiting on line.” and I yell at him. There are plenty things worse than waiting on line at the post office, you whiny jerk! What kind of privileged, sainted life are you living when the worse thing that happens to you is you have to wait at the post office?

And then two seconds later some lady says, “Can you only buy stamps? No, you idiot! That’s the stupidest question I ever pretended you asked me!” Well, she only says the first five words but the rest of the words are implied in the surly tone of her voice.

Totally innocuous commercial that gets under my skin.
Then there’s Ageless Male. This commercial runs a lot on all the science channels late at night, which leads me to believe I have the viewing habits of a 60 year old guy-- but that’s not the point. This ad is for some sort of miracle herbal testosterone replacement supplement for old guys who wanna be young and virile again. The silly thing that bothers me? The song that plays in the background during the whole thing sounds exactly like Debbie Gibson’s Only In My Dreams.

Why would you make a commercial with such ridiculous claims of regaining your youth through herbal quackery and then back it with Only In My Dreams? So many things wrong with this commercial but it’s the background music that bothers me.

The KitKat commercials with the crunching sounds. I hate them with the fury of a thousand suns.

There is a Cheetos commercial where workers are having a dance party on a job site. It’s a house build and only the framing has been completed. There are no walls.

They have not only hung a door (which you do not do until the walls are completed), they have installed the strike plates. As the wife of a contractor, this drives me crazy. I know it’s just a commercial but it’s just so wrong.

“People who know . . . know BDO.”

Not being one of the “people who know,” I have no idea what this company does, so the commercial isn’t succeeding in selling me on anything. A strange quasi-ad hominem argument for some undefined service. They might as well say:

“Here’s a box. People who know more than you pay big bucks for what’s inside. If you want to pretend to know more than you do, you’ll buy it too.”

I’m sure I’m overthinking this, but it just bugs me.

And here’s a counter-thread comment: Thank you Joseph A. Bank, for discontinuing the orgasmic-voiced commercials. I no longer have to reach for the mute button.

“What would you do for a Klondike bar?”

I don’t have a mental image of a Klondike bar. Nothing associates with those words but the song. Now, I’ve had Klondike bars lots of times and they are yummy but I had to google them to realize that’s what they were. I’d just never really paid attention to their name.

Shouldn’t a commercial tell you why you should try something instead of asking what you’d do for the privilege of trying it? It comes off so superior sounding. I don’t know, maybe the video does a better job but I generally only hear commercials and rarely watch them Maybe the video covered it nicely.

The commercial with the Karate guys using kicks to do stuff on a cell phone. Too much feet for my tastes.

There’s a Michelin commercial where the Michelin Man pulls tires out of his stomach and flings them at cars to magically help them stop faster or get better traction or gas mileage or something. Now what really bugs me about that commercial is not the magical merging of tires onto the cars.

Nope, it bugs me because he only flings two tires at each car. And they go on the same side of the cars.

I can’t stand the Nasonex bee. Most bees are female, and the males don’t do any work at all, they just hang around the hive and eat their heads off while waiting for a new queen to hatch, so they can impregnate her. Also, any milk commercial that involves bulls. Milk doesn’t come from bulls!

Keep tugging.

I don’t even remember what the commercial’s about, but a guy says “potato, potahto,” and the gal says “no, it’s tomato, tomahto.” In the context of the song they’re quoting, this makes no sense at all. He should have said “potato, tomato,” and she should have said, “no, it’s potahto, tomahto.”

There are commercials for a law firm called Binder & Binder that run nationwide. The commericals show the Statue of Liberty, and the logo has a picture of a red, white, and blue ribbon. It’s pretty safe to say that they’re doing this to scrounge up more money for their sleazy business, and not out of any sense of patriotism.

There was a birth control commercial (I’m assuming Yaz) where some women were ‘shopping’ in a store looking at trips to Paris, careers, luxury homes, etc. In one display your standard “pregnancy stork” holding a baby offers it to a woman who smiles and waves “No thanks”. Sure, I get it. She’s picking her future, department store style.

But irrationally I think “So what happens to that baby now? That was going to be her baby. Does some other woman get it? What if they look nothing alike? Does it get restocked in Purgatory or something? Does it keep developing? If the woman has a baby later, is it still that one or is this one irrevocably spoiled?..”

Commercials with what I call the “no expression expression”. The main character is doing something goofy, and then they cut to a second person watching the first person. Second person has no expression on his face- he’s just observing. Somebody’s probably making good money for just standing there with his mouth agape.

This one has got to be about 10 years old, and I still remember it because it annoyed me so much. It was for some car company - I have no idea which one, and that tells you how effective the commercial was.

A woman is driving up a long road. She stops the car and opens a magazine with a photo of a different road. She rips the picture out of the magazine, then gets out of the car, and looking Very Serious, walks a few feet ahead of the car, then sets the picture down in mid-air. Then she gets back into the car, and drives into the picture.


Look at this guy. What do you think he does with the baby?

Add Siemens and BASF to that list.

Well, there’s always adoption. :slight_smile:

AXE will make beautiful women perform sex acts on you. Doesn’t matter what you look like, act like, talk like … as long as you smell like this smarmy body spray ----- KABOOM! SEX ATTACK!

And Mentos will let you rearrange societal mores, yea even the laws of physics, to allow you to remain cluelessly self involved.

There was a commercial with women in it talking about how good something was. One woman said it was “dating a masseuse good”. Funny, she didn’t look lesbian- There’s one on now where a male is giving a massage and is called a masseuse.

Masseuses are women, massaging men are masseurs.

That Carls Jr. jalapeno burger drive-in commercial.
Issues I have with the commercial-

  1. Why is it pseudo retro 50s? Drive-in movie and she’s in a 50s get-up? Why? It’s not like it’s a classic style burger.
  2. Who is this woman? She’s kind of trashy looking. Am I supposed to know who she is? Also…am I supposed to care?
  3. SHE NEVER ACTUALLY TAKES A BITE OF THE BURGER! Never once is she shown eating the burger. She eats a jalapeno and that’s it. The camera cuts before she actually ever takes a bite.

That commercial makes me stabbier than anything else in the world! Nothing worse? Not cancer? Not poverty? Not a flaming bus full of puppies and orphans? Bah - forget that - I have to wait in line at the post office… :smack: