They should have support groups for people who come from “Law and Order” (and their many spin-offs) families. Jerry Orbach’s Posse.
CNN: Lou Dobbs…either change the name of your show or start talking about financial news on Moneyline
TNT you moronic fucks! Why did you steal A&E’s Law and Order reruns if all you’re going to do is pre-empt them with fucking NBA basketball! I hate NBA basetball! Show the Law and Order reruns at 7pm and 10pm like you’re supposed to!!!
You know? There is enough material for a Law and Order Channel.
And a Simpsons channel.
And a Gunsmoke channel.
And a Star Trek channel.
See? Real channel choices!!!
I wonder how many women cower in fear every time they see a man’s face, thanks for the Lifetime Network. Yeah, woman-in-peril movies … that’s fucking empowering.
TNT has nothing on FX when it comes to reruns. Might was well rename it the MAS*H Channel.
C-SPAN 3? As if two C-SPANs weren’t boring enough? How many public policy books are there left to review, anyhow? Are meetings of the Maryland Black Women’s Press Club really worthy of airtime?
There’s one channel on my cable system that shows almost nothing but two rabbis shouting back and forth at each other in Russian. I have no idea what that’s about.
Tech TV - just call yourself “GeeK TV” now. Either do that, or let the Sci-Fi Channel air all those anime movies and Thunderbirds episodes. Tech TV’s running more SF than the Sci-Fi Channel!
You think I"m going to leave EWTN out of this? An entire network devoted to a talk show hosted by an elderly nun in a brown burqa, interspersed with recitating the Hail Mary some 800 times in a row? That money could be better spent on heating the houses of the little old Polish ladies in Milwaukee and Buffalo that are probably the only ones watching.
Bloomberg - I wonder who’s watching that channel on Saturday night. Probably someone who must really, really care about how sweet light crude is doing on the Singapore market.
Outdoor Life Network - just rename it the “Ted Fucking Nugent Channel” or the “Travis, Beauregard and Randy kill lots of deer” channel. Tell me more about camping, survival skills, hiking … gawd, there’s more to the outdoors than offing buck on game farms in the Texas Hill Country.
Absolutely, positively no complaints about the Weather Channel. Best damn channel on cable, aside from HBO when The Sopranos is airing. Kristina Abernathy … uh huh.
Comedy Central - Switch your damn programming. If the stuff you showed at night was on at day and vice versa, I’d be much happier. Your night programming is the reason my sleep schedule is eternally whacked. And if you’re going to show SNL 26 hours a day, at least vary the episodes a little! It is really annoying to flip on CC in the afternoon and see Gwyneth Paltrow on, then see her again the very next freaking show!
Cartoon Network - You barely have enough time to show the shows you’ve got, but you keep adding new ones! Let it ride, you’re going to overload soon. Might I suggest loosening that tight schedule of yours by dropping your Cartoon Cartoon junk? Looney Tunes I can live with. The anime is the best part of your programming. But every single time I flip to you it’s “Ed, Edd, and Eddy.” Yecch.
G4TV - A cable channel for gamers. Rock. I love you. I love you. You’re great. I just wish you were on my channel lineup. But…liven up your shows a little, huh? It’s pretty damn sad when the Top 10 show is the most interesting thing on. Portal, a show about online gaming, could have been extremely cool, but no. You turned it into a fuckin’ soap? That is the dullest show there is. And for the love of Lord British, add some music! That right there would make Portal ten times more interesting. That said, you’re still a great channel. Just make a little more effort, okay?
[sub][sup]I think I hit my geek quota for the day right there…[/sup][/sub]
CN: Freakazoid is on CN… at like 4:30 in the morning. Kudos on Kenshin and Season 2 of Big O (the show where a man in a giant robot fights a conspiracy to supress the existence of the French and has a burgeoning relationship with a thirteen-year old girl… but wait: it’s okay! She’s actually only a few MONTHS old. And she’s a robot girl. Whoo-wee!)
TNT: I understand the Law & Order fetish… but what’s going on with the Clair Kincaid episodes? I’ve seen the same few eps repeated over and over, with whole seasons entirely missing from the lineup. Does someone else own the rights?
—FoxNews no one with an IQ above idiot range believes you have any intention of being “fair and balanced”—
What I don’t get is why they repeat every god damn five minutes: even the supposed straight-ahead journalists. No exaggeration.
TLC - Just what am I “learning” by watching a bunch of idiots ruin each other’s living rooms?
I learned how to replace the tile in my bathroom by watching Hometime. I learned how to recover my dining room chairs with {i]The Furniture Guys*.
The only thing I learn by watching your channel now is that if someone tries to convince me to go out of town it is probably a ruse designed so they can throw some red drapes up onto my windowless wall.
Oops, sorry 'bout that little coding area!
HTML - caps GOOD. vB - caps BAD.
SPEED- Enough with the stupid crapcar and its derivatives. We need the good old stuff, like WRC LIVE. And any other road racing series live. Especially ALMS, Trans-AM FIA GT, or any other sports car series. Anything but stupid oval track racing. Heck, even 10 year olds in go carts is better than CRAPCAR. And stop putting a commercial every 5 minutes. Especially the same ones. If I wanted to know the results of owning a bowflex, I would go out and buy one!
The greates idea I’ve heard in years. I would watch that channel literally all the time if it existed. I’ve been watching them for 11 years and I still haven’t seen all of them. BTW, I don’t hate up but it has become out of hand. It’s a very interesting show, but all the spinoffs and character changes just don’t do it for me.
First it was the new male Lion that had taken over a pride and started by killing all the cubs of his predecessor. Then there was the starving lonely lost orphan baby elephant. I changed it right as the narrator says, “then the hyenas came…”
:mad: They actually follow the progress of this starving elephant without offering a peanut of help. Priceless.
The whole concept of passive, non-interferance with nature makes me want to smack the cameraman.
I’ve started calling the Cute Dead Baby Animal Planet Channel
Watching Animal Cops sends me into fits of violent ideations.