No crime against humanity. I mostly meant that it’s really OK with me personally not to have to go through the whole rigamarole of these holidays. But I am feeling unusually bitter this year because it’s year 3 of not having any communication with my dad because, I guess, he just decided he was tired of the whole dad/grandparent thing or something. Or maybe he’s pissed off at me for some random reason. Or maybe he’s dead! (Probably not; another relative would have informed me. I think.) I have no idea, because I haven’t heard from him in three years even though we only live about 50 miles apart.
Don’t mind me. Carry on with your celebrating and whatnot. I made cookies for MrWhatsit so I guess that will be nice.
Sorry about your dad. I was thinking more about this AS a dad… even though my wife and son are away, I have a hard time (even humorously) seeing father’s day as something to be upset about.
I think you could just buy a tie and the regular chia kit, and paint the goopy seed gel on the tie instead of the ceramic thing. And then regularly water the tie. Maybe sew a plastic liner on the back so it doesn’t soak through the shirt.
I made the mistake of going to Hallmark on Saturday to pick up an anniversary card for a relative. I was accosted at the door by a Hallmark employee:
Hallmark Employee: “Are you looking for Father’s Day cards?”
Me: “No, I’m looking for -”
HE: “Do you need one for a grandfather? We have Father’s Day cards for grandfathers.”
Me: “No, I just need -”
HE: “Are you sure you don’t need a Father’s Day card? It’s tomorrow.”
Me: “NO. I need an anniversary card.”
HE: “Is it for your father?”
My father and both grandfathers are dead. Fuck off, Hallmark.
My dad took me fishing, got me puppies, took me to scouts, bought me GI Joes, poked holes in jar lids for lightening bugs, camped out with me, made me work in the garden and cut the lawn but gave me an allowance, told stories of his youth, kept a trunk of memorabilia from his world travels in the navy that he let me paw through, took me to football games, bought me Aurora monster models, took us on roadtrips to great places where lots of pictures were taken, took me Christmas tree hunting, made every Christmas great, took me bird hunting, gave me a bike, gave me a minibike, gave me a motorcycle, gave me a car, gave me date money, gave me the freedom to go hang with my buds, gave me a great childhood that I will carry with me always and try but fail to pass on to my kids because there will never be another like him ever.
I wish so much I could tell him happy fathers day and give him some crappy Old Spice just to feel him hug me awkwardly and change the subject. Instead I go make sure there are no limbs on his grave from the massive oak he is burried under.
My kid got me a teddy bear that looks just like the one in one of her favorite bedtime stories I read to her. Completely her idea, too, my wife just drove her to the store. And I absolutely love it. How, at a couple months shy of three years old, she can choose a gift that so perfectly represents the moments we share and how much they mean to her, I have no idea.
I’m sorry your kids apparently buy you crappy gifts. Of course if you’re so emotionally stunted you can barely appreciate a hug, that probably makes it a bit harder for them.
My father taught me the joy of farting noises and the lyrics to “Great Green Globs of Greasy Grimy Gopher Guts,” watched Bozo the Clown with me, and taught me to never stop learning. His moans of agony when I took him out to lunch and bought him the gift he asked for were truly heartbreaking.
I bought my dad a book from a series we both like, and a card with a stupid joke on it. He put up with a lot raising me and my sister, so it only seems fair that he gets to reap the benefits of Hallmark holidays. Plus I have to maintain my position as the favourite child
I have an institutional dislike for almost every holiday, and especially the Hallmark Holidays. Just wasn’t raised to care much for the false feeling events, and the hype that surrounds them.
On the other hand I call my parents at least twice a week if not more (they are in their eighties) and I have no worries that they have any question of my love.
My family has an appreciation for the steady flow of love that defines our days, so the holidays (pretty much all of them) are generally unnecessary. That even includes the biggies: birthdays and Christmas.
I will admit I am partial to Thanksgiving because it’s a great time to see the family together for a meal and conversation without the pain of gift giving, but that’s my only weakness.
Now I absolutely appreciate anyone who wishes to celebrate any occasion they want, I won’t piss on your parade. But I do grow tired of being demonized for not giving a damn myself. I always thought being there every day was more important than showing up for a couple holidays a year.
I hate arguing with people who can’t understand that. Sadly I know I am destined never to be free to live this way.
I’m always entertained by the difference between Mother’s Day and Father’s Day at churches. Typically, moms get to hear how wonderful they are, and everybody gets flowers. Dads always get a sermon about rising up and leading or some such thing that implies they’re not doing a very good job. Huh?
I made a little book of photos for my husband with pictures of him and the kids and some silly captions. (We are not a Large Present Family.) He seemed very pleased.
Yep, I agree. I wish that instead of focusing on these “special days” (mostly Mother’s, Father’s, and Valentine’s days) people would realize that doing something special -however little- for someone for no greater reason than you like them and are thinking about them means much more than something given on a mandatory holiday.
I’m not putting this well, but it seems to me that the prevailing attitude now is that you can be self centered and oblivious to others in your life for most of the year so long as you cough up a really good gift on Hallmark Holidays.
Personally I’d far rather have my husband notice when I’m really tired and feeling icky and so offer to cook or do dishes or something than have him buy me a ring I don’t want or need for Mothers Day.
But, I’m also not a holiday minded person, and I don’t care for big celebrations in general, so YMMV.
