It can be an hour, 10 years or a lifetime, and it’s still always too soon for a loved-one to leave us. It’s especially difficult when we must become part of the when and how of their departure to prevent further and needless suffering.
You are truly brave and obviously loving of this little creature. Don’t be hard on yourself for doing what is right – I know from personal experience one can spend a lot of time second-guessing the decision that is never easy to make or follow-through, but which in one’s heart of hearts, one knows is necessary for sparing a loved-one more pain.
At least take some comfort that you can spend some final time with her now before what must be done is done. Take this time to make it special for both of you. Take some pictures (or video), lavish her with milk and cream (which is usually a no-no for kitties), cuddle her close, and enjoy her purr and softness for this moment…while you can…then make her a promise to meet her at the Rainbow Bridge someday.
You both have my deepest sympathy and thoughts in this difficult time.
Guin, I’ve been following this thread (and a couple of other that are related) for a few days… and I still haven’t come up with anything to say other than: I’m really sorry! Sometimes life sucks.
I wish I could come up with something better than that. Sorry.
Unbeliever-23. And yes, I’ve also lost a grandfather and an aunt. I KNOW it’s not the worst thing I can go through, okay? Do you mind?
Peta-we’re doing that. Giving her cottage cheese-my dad bought the super rich creamy kind for her. She isn’t that hungry, though. My mom made her a special blanket -crocheted with sparkly threads and little tassels on the end. She’s huddling under it now. Right now, she’s sitting down in the kitchen. She’s been sleeping at night with my sister. We don’t have a video camera, but we’re taking pictures of her-and we have a lot we haven’t even developed yet.
I’ll be okay, and then something will hit me, and I’ll lose it. Like I set Gypsy on my bed and pulled open the blinds and the curtains…and I thought of how Tess loves to sit on my bed and look out the window, and lost it.
I don’t know. I’ve lost a cat before, but Fluffy, as close as she was, as special as she was, was sixteen, and had two strokes-it was more like, I missed her, but I was glad she was out of any pain and hadn’t suffered. It wasn’t a total shock, like this is.
Guinastasia, this will sound like a really weird question at a time like this, but did you ever see a rather strange Charles Bronson movie titled “From Noon til Three”? Near the end of the movie there is a song, set in waltz time, and it begins
“Some have a lifetime, some just a day.
Love isn’t something you measure that way.”
Don’t let anyone tell you that just because you had the kitty a short time, that the pain will be less. It’s not how long you loved, but that you DID love.
Guin, I’m really sorry to hear of the negative outcome for your kitty. Having almost lost my mutt several weeks ago, I know the heartbeark you are going through. Watching what should be young life about to bloom, droop and wilt instead is never easy.
Guin, so sorry to hear about your kitty. I’ve lost two cats in my life (I’m only 17) and losing them was some of the toughest, saddest, times of my life.
My way of getting over the sad times following their departure was to remember every all the times I had with them, and I promised myself I’d never forget them. It’s not real logical, but so long as they are alive in my mind, they’ve not left me. Some nights, I wake up after a dream where they were there, and I cry for a while, only to stop when I remember that, despite them being gone for something close to a decade or so now, they still haven’t left me, and never will.
I know different things work for different people, but I’m a real cat person, and that helped me feel better when I lost my cats. I hope something like that works for you as well, because your kitty will always be with you emotionally, and I’m sure she will live in the minds of some who’ve posted here, as well.
My thoughts are with you and Tess…{{{Guinastasia and her kitties}}}
I remember the night after Fluffy died-I was sitting in the kitchen, trying to read until I was too tired to keep my eyes open, so I wouldn’t cry myself to sleep. Noel was sitting on the washer looking at me and then at the space beside her, where Fluffy would usually lie. I was reading, and out of the corner of my eye-I swear to GOD, I thought I saw something dark and grey jump off the washer-but when I looked there was nothing.
Then, in the middle of the night, I was half asleep, and I felt something jump up on the bed-but I looked and no one was there. To this day, I know it was Fluffy telling me goodbye. My mom said she saw the same thing when our old old cat, Meow (who died when I was five, and was a really nasty old cat who only liked my mom-not me-I used to chase her all over the house and she’d punch me in the face, being declawed) was put to sleep. She said that night, she thought she felt Meow come in bed beside her.
I have to say, this has got to be the least pit-like thread I’ve ever seen.
Guin: I hope you will take care of yourself as well as you are taking care of your kitty. Sigh…sickness and sadness really suck. A good cat friend of mine died of a sudden illness last May, and I know how terrible it is to feel powerless.
It is heartening, however, to read a thread from someone named “Dark Emissary” sharing happy memories of his kitties. Dark Emissary, you sound like one heck of a seventeen year old.
Ignatzmouse, thanks, I like to think of myself as a dark brooding type, but I melt around cats.
And Guin’s tale has had me worrying about my own cats all day today. I’m so sorry for your loss, Guin, because I’d totally lose it if I lost one of my cats now, they’ve been with me 9 years, two of them, and I can barely remember a time before they were with me.
Like others have said, treasure the times you have them, it’s so easy to forget how much a part of your life they are until they are gone.
I guess by now, whatever was going to happen, has. I can’t help hoping the vet decided to try to pull her through, but I know better. Guin, how are you doing? I’ve been thinking aboout you all week. Take care.
I have a somewhat unique worry when it comes to my cats.
I have two, an all-black (Mono) and a calico (Poly*) who are tasked with keeping the vermin out of the horse feed.
And being primarily outdoor cats here in Backwater, Alaska, there’s a definite danger of one of them being snatched up by an Eagle.
I’m not joking. It’s happened before (not to me though) and there’s three nesting pairs of Bald Eagles plus some loners within, oh, about a thousand yard radius of my house. Plus they tend to pass close by when travelling from the deep woods out to the River to snag a salmon.
One of these days it’s entirely possible that one of the cats will be crossing one of the pastures after a nice juicy mouse, and SHWOOP! Especially in midsummer when the eaglets hatch, and the parents want something big to haul back to the nest.
(*That’s “Monochromatic” and “Polychromatic”, in case you didn’t catch that. )
I’m okay. I think I’m numb, now. It is buried in the back of my mind. I have a feeling I’m going to crack though, sooner or later. The other night I started crying before I got in the shower.
)