Damn it! (yet another gay marriage rant)

The BBQ Pit
1

I’m posting in the Pit because I don’t know where this is going to go as I type. I just… need to vent.

As the days get closer and closer to November 2nd, I find myself moving ever closer to tears of rage and sadness at the “debate” I see going on in my own state (Kentucky) and across the river in Ohio. My stomach is right now turning into one huge knot because of reading too much ignorance from the mouths of people who are probably quite decent overall. The people who plan to vote “yes” on November 2nd to Issue 3 (OH) and the Kentucky Amendment. What makes me furious isn’t exactly them. What makes me furious are the “people” bilking this like it was just another flexible issue.

Well FUCK YOU! No. Seriously. Go shove a red hot poker in your ear and SWIVEL IT AROUND YOU DIRTY LITTLE PUKE-ASSED EXPLOITATIVE INHUMAN REPULSIVE SHIT-MOUTHED SOUL-LESS, HEARTLESS, GUTLESS UNRIGHTEOUS SUITED WONDERS. Fuck you. AND your so-called perfect reading of the Bible. Bah! You get a tiny boner every time you get a scrap of power by pounding the pulpit, by playing the game with political leaders. Is this righteous behavior as Jesus would’ve understood it? NO. THIS IS YOU USING ME AND MY LIFE SO YOUR ERECTILE DYSFUNCTIONED LITTLE PRICK CAN GET IN GOOD WITH THE WHITE HOUSE. I’m not an issue.

I AM NOT AN ISSUE.

I am a citizen! I am a human! Goddammit I will NOT be trivialized by you or anyone for any reason! I WAS BORN AND RAISED IN THIS COMMUNITY! 20 years I have lived in this one place. I went to school two miles from my home. I moved just once within the same small city. I have poured time, effort and money into this area. I have as much invested here as any other citizen you care to name. No matter where I go, my memories will always be anchored to this region. Until now that was no bad thing.

But you’ve soured that for me, you ignorami. You with your so-called “sanctity of marriage” knocking down the pillars of my past, present, and hope for the future. Pitting me against those I knew as neighbors. I’m angry like I’ve rarely been angry before because you all have pissed, not just in my pond, but in the pond of all those you’ve spread hate and lies to. You’ve darkened the spirit of my community with your rhetoric. I’ve SEEN you all speak and let me tell you there’s no love to be found there. Your words are ash in your mouth and you spit them upon faces I’ve known so well and you have the gall to call it “God’s truth”.

Fuck you. Fuck you for making me feel unsafe in the home I’ve had for the past 10 years. Fuck you for making me cry tears of futility. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck!

We knock on doors. We canvass over and over. But there are so many doors, so much hate to heal… and all because of you so-called pro-community values people. You’ve destroyed my hope for community, made me feel like I couldn’t have one, made me want to run away.

But I won’t do it. Not because of you, anyway. I’ll try to heal the damage you’ve done and if I do go away, I’ll always be back. This is my place and I will help to make it beautiful again. And maybe one day you’ll realize that penis envy isn’t a reason to hate. Or maybe you’ll find Viagra. And maybe one day you’ll be there to help me.

But I will do it with or without you.

2

This is very powerfully written. My hopes (and the hopes of all thinking, feeling people) that the Nov. 2nd vote goes well.

3

What are Issue 3 (OH) and the Kentucky Amendment? Are they related, one for each state?

4

They’re roughly similar amendments proposed for the state constitutions that would ban gay marriage as well as the vague “or any likeness to”, which is basically a train wreck in waiting. You can read them insanely wide, banning even powers of attorney, child custody, visiting rights etc. etc. etc. Given a judge predisposed to doing so (and trust me, there are more than a few in both states), even the most carefully prepared unmarried couple of any gender combination could see their contracts and legal bindings simply vanish in a huge puff of wasted money and bigotry.

5

Actually, I think you want “yes” on Issue 3 in Ohio (city of Cincinnati, to repeal some discrimination law or something- I don’t know the full details myself). The gay marriage ban amendment in Ohio is Issue 1.

6

As a Kentucky Colonel, I’ll do my best to bend the Governor’s ear!

It is distressing when the name of Jesus is used to do things which he would not in all likelihood endorse. I say ‘in all likelihood’ not as an out but because I do not presume to speak for him - even, indeed, to understand him fully. But I aspire to.

7

Good God you’re right, PigBoy. I got a little too worked up and my fact-checking abilities shut down. I even did door to door work for “Yes on 3” :smack:

Issue ONE is the amendment in Ohio (Vote NO!)
Issue THREE is about repealing Article XII of the Cincinnati city charter (Vote YES)

And Kentucky only has the one issue on the ballot.

8

Just out of sheer curiosity, how many minds have you all changed so far?

9

Actually when we talk one-on-one with folks, we often persuade them. Its just there are so few of us and so many to talk to.

10

Really, how do you do it? I always thought this was one of those issues where people had their minds made up and that was that.

11

Like I said somewhere in that incoherent rant, people are actually woefully ignorant of multiple facts because they’re only ever hearing from one source. You walk to their door and say “Hi, I’m gay” (not literally, but effectively) and their attitude often changes just from that one encounter. Some of the people doing the work are the same tight bright shirt wearing, purple-haired nancy boys that haunt the nightmares of Baptist ministers, but that doesn’t matter. In fact it’s better because for once people are given a chance to see the entire personality. It gives them a chance to confront the stereotype and see how shallow it is, to see how intelligent, funny and good that same person can be.

It defuses the threat that their ministers, their politicians have built up in their minds about how evil gay people must be. The truth is that many people were never given a chance to truly make their mind up because it was just too filled with garbage. If you can shuffle past the garbage for just five minutes, if you can get them to think about the issue, most people end up moving at least a little. Many times they move from supporting the amendment to voting no, even though they may still personally oppose gay marriage.

12

Keep up the good work. The vote’s going to be very close here in Oregon. We are throwing as much money at it as we can.

13

So, do you provide rent-a-gay-person services to those who wish to persuade family/friends that gay marriage isn’t inherently evil after all? :wink:

(Sometimes, I wish such a thing did exist – anyone want to go talk to some of my friends and relatives? :stuck_out_tongue: )

14

When I was in High School, my family found ourselves homeless. My mom was buying a home directly from the owner or so she thought. Our Rent to Own payment s in fact covered and then some the owners mortgage, but he didn’t pass the money around. Consequently we were informed by the bank that held the mortgage that we were in fact illegally occupying an apartment (it was a duplex) and had 15 days to leave. At the time we were regular church-goers, and I was attending class at Golden Gate Seminary and CAL.

Nearly all of us were in the choir, my mom and myself were teaching Sunday School, and I was the Youth Minister for said church, as a junior in High School. We went to the church and asked for help. They never even held an offering. Instead the pastor asked for various families to take us in; splitting us up. A Guy named Richard, a choir member and a good friend of both my Mother and myself offered to take us all in, but only had a two bedroom house. My mom compromised (not wanting him to carry the entire burden) by having us boys stayed with him while she and my sister camped out on the living room floor of my retired grandmother.

But there was a problem with Richard amongst the church people. You see Richard was gay. Almost immediately it was assumed that he was molesting us. Nothing could have been further from the truth, but that didn’t stop the looks, or the snickering. In all honesty Richard was the only male figure I’d had in my life that wasn’t abusive or alcoholic. He made sure we went to school, ignored the whispers and became the best friend I’ve ever had despite our age difference.

I try to remember Richard when I get mad at Christians for all the shit they put gay people through. But it’s so goddamned hard. You see that’s when I first turned away from organized religion. I stopped attending seminary within three months. I sat on the stairs of my church every day after school for a week or more asking God why this was happening, and got no answer. To this day, it still hurts, that the most compelling instance of Christian like behavior I’ve ever witnessed, was accomplished by someone the church shunned mercilessly.

I don’t know how Richard felt about gay marriage, but he had the same partner thoughout the time I knew them. They both died with neither being able to visit the other during frequent hosptital stays. Richard died almost ten years ago; I fight on his behalf.

15

(Major aside) Ooh! The first time I’ve heard of anyone outside church who’s even heard of Golden Gate Seminary, let alone gone there! (I never was a seminarian, alas, but have known many students, faculty, and alumni there from my years as an active Southern Baptist in the western US.) So, can I ask what you studied then, or is that a time I should avoid?

16

No it’s alright, I was taking an Eschatolgy (end times) course at the time (I was trying to take courses to coincide with a through the Bible in one year session we had going on Wenesday night, we were on Revelations), I had already been through several other courses, I know I was taking a different class at Cal, but can’t recall now what it was, though I suspect it had to do with Paulian theory.

17

You know, this was at about the same time my church was contemplating switching from American Baptist to Southern Baptist, as I seem to recall. There was a big event in Fresno, where several dozen churches split off at that time to join the Southern Baptists, mine didn’t although it seemed to in all but name.

18

Or for any, um, other purposes?

19

In case there is anyone in Cincinnati that is going to vote on Issue 3 (not that anyone here doesn’t already do their homework, but in the interest of fighting ignorance…), here’s the issue and text:

Vote Yes to repeal / Vote No to retain Article XII

Article XII:

Repealing Article XII is the only way to ensure gays can be protected against discrimination. Furthermore, according to the Greater Cincinnati Convention and Visitors Bureau, the law is economically unsound:

Local media coverage: link 1 and link 2.

I guess you probably know where I stand. But I thought it better to tell folks what there voting on insteading of just telling them to vote Yes! :slight_smile:

Best of luck to fellow supporters seeing all these measures all over the country dealt with appropriately. Where’s the round file when you need it?

20

Priam, I’m a bit north of you in Ohio, but I will be voting no to the anti-gay marriage amendment (I’m pretty sure it will be on the ballot here - the only place I know it’s not is Cuyahoga County). I just hope that everyone who is against stripping people of their basic, human rights will go to the polls and vote that day.

My godfather, who passed away when I was seventeen, was gay. He was another uncle to me, another brother to my dad. I sometimes wonder what he would think of the way this issue is tearing the nation apart. However, I have no doubt what he would think of the issue itself. Since he can’t be here to speak for himself, I will speak for him when I go to the polls on November 2. It’s the only way I have of keeping his memory alive for myself - I will not allow hatred and bigotry to view his life as wrong.

Ava