Merged into existing thread.
Well, the premiere has aired and… I think the only surprise of the night was Kyle Massey. Everyone else was just as inept or just as good as predicted.
Oh, I dunno, Hasselhoff was somewhat worse than I expected. And I wasn’t expecting Rick Fox to do quite so well (or for Carrie Anne to get quite so, um, graphic).
The guy who’s dancing with Margaret Cho–does he always get plump women who think they’re funny? (Cho in other circumstances actually is funny.)
I thought the first couple, Audrina (who I’ve never, ever heard of before) were robbed.
Other than that, what I expected.
Does anyone know how to watch full episodes on abc.com? Either the font is too small and I can’t find the correct link, or there’s some magic hidden secret, or I’m an idiot (possibly all three). But all I can seem to manage to do is play the commercials, previews and interviews.
I’m about 2 days and counting from my big move to Seattle and no longer have TV, and after tonite no more internet either, so was hoping to take a break and watch it, and every website I’ve tried, I can’t seem to figure this out. It’s not just a click and play thing. sheesh. (at least not the sites I’ve tried).
Thanks!
Well, I’d never seen Rick Fox before, and I am stunned. Stunned that a man could be that gorgeous, and stunned that he danced so well that the height issue simply went away on the floor - after seeming so insurmountable in rehearsal. Kyle was also excellent, and (very unusually) I really like Lacey’s new blonde look. It’s like she bleached out the brat with the color, too. The bad girl seems to be gone; good riddance. Grey was good too, although I think she over-played the dead Patrick Swayze card (in her favor, it doesn’t really look as if she meant that to be public), and Derek is, as always, fantastic.
Margaret Cho seemed to be dancing so surprisingly well before she went comedic. She badly misjudged there, I think. The judges and audience are pretty forgiving when someone who can’t dance at all goes the comedy route, but Cho clearly demonstrated that she can dance. The judges should have hit her with fours, rather than fives, as she mocked the entire show for no good reason, and minimal comedic value. As it was, she ended up tied with several others whose sin was being unable, rather than unwilling. (That being said, I can totally understand her being convinced she’d make an idiot of herself if she tried it straight, and went for the laughs instead. But her pro should have straightened her out. That uber-perfectionist Louis van Amstel went along with it is astonishing.)
Florence Henderson really brought home to me how Susan Lucci was underrated. Because she competed in the same season as Chloris Leachman, nobody cut her a break for her age at all; she was judged by the same standards as the twenty-and-thirty-somethings. But she was in her sixties, and her dancing was damned impressive given her age. Henderson herself danced like a woman in her sixties, which ain’t bad for someone who is 76.
“The Situation” clearly had loads of potential, but I won’t break my heart if he goes home fairly early. He’s annoying, and what’s up with the hair?
Palin wasn’t bad, but she’s my first target for elimination; her very existence annoys me. Unfortunately, having demonstrated even a modest degree of ability, the audience will keep her around forever; I suspect DwtS’s demographic skews heavily to the right. As The Waco Kid (Gene Wilder) said in the immortal Blazing Saddles: “These are people of the land. The common clay of the new West. You know… morons.”
I thought the QB, Kurt (2nd one to dance), was not good, and was very surprised that he got such good scores from Carrie Ann and Bruno. He’s probably going to have a massive fail in Latin. Funny; I expected a quarterback to be more graceful than the running backs and blockers we’ve seen on this show before.
When one of the first things a judge says to you is “Well, you got through it, and that’s the most important thing,” as Len said to Michael Bolton, you gotta figure you’re in some trouble. Same thing with “It’s never too early to panic,” which Len said to Hasselhoff. I think they’re both going down early.
Audrina and Brandy were both competent and beautiful. No real feel for either yet.
What did The Situation say to Len after his dance? I didn’t catch it, but it sounded like The Situation insulted, or tried to insult Len, but Len promtly turned it back on him with his “You’ve got the guns, but no ammunition” quip.
What did The Situation say?
Also, I believe with every fiber of my being that the The Situation is the lamest nom de guerre in the history of noms de guerre.
I pretty much agree with Oy! on everything. I can’t remember - has Cheryl had a super-tall partner before? I was flat-out shocked that she had Rick Fox standing up straight and tall, despite the height difference. She’s going to be able to move enough to keep up with him, no worries (although she might have to go back to the shorter heels to be able to do so as the season goes on), but she’s got him using his feet reasonably well, and his posture is great.
I thought Margaret Cho had a bad misjudgment there, and she’s my pick to go home tonight. Too bad, she had some funny rehearsal bits that I enjoyed - “I thought I was learning to dance, not entering therapy!”
I was very unimpressed with the “only 5 days” bit with The Situation. If you can’t commit to doing the show in the timeframe that it’s happening, don’t sign up. We didn’t hear Evan Lysacek wail and moan about how he was touring while he was dancing. They showed it in the rehearsals, obviously, but I can’t remember him bringing it up himself, certainly not as a reason for any failures in performance (not that he had that many, anyway).
I don’t understand why they didn’t send Karina to wherever he was doing whatever he was doing. They’ve had “stars” filming things before and the pros hang out off stage to rehearse in between takes.
If Margaret Cho had done a different kind of comedy - not “I can’t dance” comedy but something funny, it might have worked. But she could. That wasn’t well thought out.
I was also impressed with Rick Fox and realized that’s been the problem with a lot of male celebs in the past - they’re dancing down to their partners rather than letting their partners dance up to them. Cheryl said that, he believed it, and he looked pretty damn good.
Here was my take:
**Audrina **-- looked pretty decent. Obviously new, and lacking in crispness, but she at least had the basics down.
Kurt – I was with Len on Kurt. I thought he looked awkward and disconnected, and his arm movements were anything but graceful. Every time he thrust one of his long arms straight out awkwardly, I giggled.
Kyle – Wow. I am astonished at how good this kid was. He’s a stocky little kid, but dude can work it.
Rick – Damn. I’ll be in my bunk.
Margaret – Not funny enough to be a comedy routine, but too much silliness for what was otherwise quite a lovely waltz. You can only get away with an “I can’t X” comedy routine when you’ve proven that you really can X. There was a figure skater who used to do a gala routine that was based on it being her first junior competition – she’d deliberately fall, smack gum, wear too much makeup, etc. And it was hilarious. Because the night before, she’d probably kicked everyone’s asses, landed everything and looked like a dream. Margaret doesn’t have a night before.
Brandy – lovely. She looked nice. I think she might be better at Latin, even.
Bristol – didn’t actually have a lot to do, there were only a few short step sequences. I wonder if she had trouble learning the routines or if Mark was just keeping it simple for week 1? She looked good at what she actually did. She came across even dumber than Audrina Patridge though. That could be just nerves, though – Audrina, after all, has many years experience of being a ditz on television.
Florence – Can I just say how jealous I am of her legs? She’s in her 70s! That’s not fair. I think I would have preferred to see her do a waltz – or at least a more serious dance. But at least it was just an edge of funny on top of actual dancing.
**Michael **-- I didn’t actually see his routine.
Situation – Much better than I would have thought possible. I was a little surprised at the negativeness of the judges. There were a couple of sections of decent footwork in there.
Jennifer – There are only 12 songs on the Dirty Dancing soundtrack. What are they going to do when they run out? I thought her dance was lovely. Of course, I continue to think she’s a ringer. Hello! She’s most famous for a ballroom dancing movie.
The Hoff – I’m not sure how much actual dancing was in that routine, and I think both Kym and David knew it, even before Bruno said it.
And to add some predictions:
Margaret is my most likely to go home. She’s not that popular, and her routine was a trainwreck. Otherwise, either Florence or The Hoff.
And my week one guesstimate of a final three:
Rick, Jennifer, Kyle.
Agree on your (way premature) final three – those three are final five, fer sher, barring injury. (Oh, wait, that’s SYTYCD – nevermind.)
Margaret made the same mistake Penn Gillette did – failed to understand the DWTS ethos, which is resolutely unironic. She dissed the audience and she must pay. (Wow, FF spell-check recognizes “dissed” but not “unironic.” Go figure.)
Based on badness, it should be the Hoff. I’m not sure how strong his fan base is – this ain’t Germany, after all. I think Florence is too popular (Brady Bunch nostalgia; the token oldster), and she did too well. Not sure if Bristol’s tangential political connection will be enough to get strong support in that section of the audience that votes strictly on who they like, not how well the person did.
Tom Bergeron just tweeted
I’m still putting my money on Margaret Cho for first elimination, which is a shame. My favorite rehearsal clip line of the night was, “I thought I was gonna learn to dance, not enter therapy.” But I think Louis is pretty smarmy as a teacher, even though he’s an awesome dancer.
I actually think we’re going to see Brandy, Rick, Jennifer for final three.
My money is on The Situation to go tonight, having rewatched, I think he’s going to pay for the great crime of arrogance. He talked over the judges, he thought he could get away with doing well at this just because he’s “good at everything” and I don’t think that’s gonna fly with the DWTS audience, which is known to reward perseverance and effort.
Except for Master P, of course.
The results show just aired on the East Coast.
Surprised? Why? He sucked!
ETA: What’s with Mark Balas’s haircut?
Because the worst dancer never goes home first. Or even second.
Good point. 
Well the Baywatch fans let another favorite get eliminated. They didn’t come through for Pam last season or David this time. I’m surprised.
Cho needed to go home after that train wreck of a dance with the cape. That was beyond painful to watch.
I’m still laughing at Lacey’s comment to Kyle. “Are you looking at my boobs?” Of course he was? They are too nice a set to ignore. LOL Lacey sure had “the girls” on display in tonights results show. They were close to falling out of her dress.
I’m glad there wasn’t any shock eliminations.
Santana and Daughtry doing a Def Leppard song. With ballroom dancers. Sometimes, this show is just weird.
Still, the right person went home.