Glad to hear it Macnbaish. The fact that she called you even before she could check her schedule is a very good sign.
I have quite a few friends in their twenties, and I can assure you that this isn’t what they want. I’m sure that they do have some different customs and practices, but only a select few psychos want somebody that plays head games with them.
You had a lucky escape, in my view.
Plus, he has long, girly hair. 
Ah, that must be the geeky/nerdy stupidity/jackassness.
So far I’ve only had stupid stupidity, like “i seen u read dostokiveski, wat kind of magazine is thta ?”
To play devil’s advocate. If she did put a sentence in there that said “Make sure to include the word honeydew in your email to me so I’ll know you read my profile” and you didn’t do it…well, the blame is not entirely on her. You either ignored the request or didn’t actually read her profile. (If she didn’t do that, nevermind then).
Of course, I’d probably skip past someone that made such a request, IMHO, that’s part of ‘playing games.’ You haven’t even met her yet, and she’s already mad at you. This seems like the type of person that you’d spend a lot of time mumbling “I’m not a fucking mind reader” under your breath as your walked away.
When I was on eHarmony, I responded back to each profile because I thought it would help the computers understand what I didn’t want. (They gave you a list of reasons why you weren’t interested). Not that it seemed to improve my matches. However, it wasn’t a total waste of money - I made a great friend from it.
On OKC, I would ignore the spammers and block the maniacs (like the guy who evidently worked at my neighborhood Costco on a work release program; the bible-thumper who demanded my number because Jesus told him that we were meant to be.)
The rest, the ones who were nice but were seemingly not my type, I would respond back to with a thanks for their comment. I never would rule out somebody who could type legitmate sentences until a second email exchange. It usually ended up that I was able to show them where we weren’t compatible, and ended on congenial terms.
It worked out well for me - OKC is not as big a pond as one would think - and people end up knowing each other after a while - it’s a dating scene after all. I preferred to have a reputation for giving people a shot and being nice than being a bitch.
True dat.
After a break from the Wild Wacky World Of Online Dating I’m diving back into the pool and some friends recommended OK Cupid so I’m throwing a profile on there.
As a guy, I assume that I’ll be sending out far more emails than I’ll be receiving. When I used to do Match and JDate I always preferred a quick “No thanks, not interested” to no response. My perspective is that it’s not rude - kind of the opposite, it’s just a brief polite acknowledgement.
So are you going to send me a pic or what?
Maybe I’m just retarded but her profile was massive and I really did sit there reading through it. I must’ve missed it, I guess. I sent a detailed message asking about quite a few things she mentioned. I’m not bothered by being rejected and blocked, but really, what a bitch.
I didn’t know the request existed otherwise I might have the same reaction.
.
Bull. Every guy I know who is “good with the ladies” plays head games with them. Every girl says she doesn’t want guys who play games, but that seems to only mean they want one that does a better job at hiding it.
I find that my refusal to play games greatly decreased my responses, to the point where I no longer bother to check any dating sites. All I get is the occasional person telling me I look good–and, honestly, the reason I’m using online dating is so I can tell you about myself and give you something other than my looks to judge.
(No, I’m not particularly handsome, either. In my opinion, quite the opposite.)
Get a haircut hippie! Oh wai-
As someone who’s answered a LOT of ads on various sites, and been answered with 95% silence, I prefer the silence. It beats getting told “Thanks for the effort, it was for nothing and you wasted your time” over and over again. I’ve only had one unsolicited email on OKCupid, and it was some girl sending out awards to pretty much everyone. We had a conversation, but it ultimately didn’t work out.
I did get a “You haven’t been here awhile, we miiiissss yooooouuuuu” email from OKCupid while back, like some 14 year old attentionwhoring emo. Uh, yea, that’s because I was putting in too much effort for virtually no return (see previous paragraph).
About the kids thing, I already have kids, and don’t want any more. I also don’t want to help raise anyone else’s kids either unless they’re my kids’ age (which they won’t be, I started young) Unfortunately many women want or already have kids, so my dating pool is more wading pool than swimming pool.
I’ll go check my inbox again.
Bugger.
Dear Robot Arm,
You are receiving this thread hijack because we here at the SDMB have been watching you and have determined you are teh hawtness.
We were contacted by OKC because they were in all a tither. You are so teh hawt that they have had to create a category above and beyond those you may have seen. The piles of discarded drafts of this category notification letter have literally covered the floor of the printing room and the mere sight of your picture on the OKC tech writer’s 'puter screen caused a spark of amazing combustibility to literally leap off the screen and land on the pile of discarded attempts to capture the full extent of your hawtness, resulting in a 7-alarm fire and the total destruction of the hard drive and keyboard the tech writer was using.
The monitor miraculously survived - but now has teh hawt vissage of your image permanently burned in to the pixels of the screen. Many of the employees of OKC have seen it as a sign from dieties and beings elsewhere and have enshrined the monitor behind fire-proof glass. They often spend their coffee breaks and lunch hours postulant around your shrine - and swear that they have had wounds healed and found inner peace. Some have even given up smoking so they can worship instead at the altar of you. Productivity has had a marked decline at OKC, but job satisfaction has increased exponentially off the charts.
Alll this is to say that the reason for the lack of letter in your OKC inbox is because they and now we at SDMB are all too overwhelmed by the hawtness that is you to complete the compilation of adulation and adorations in to one document that would succinctly but sufficiently express the hawtness that is you.
I would go on, but it’s my turn at the shrine . . . .
With hawt regards,
–mh
[/hijack]
Okay, well if it makes you feel better to think that women don’t like you because you don’t play head games, go right ahead.
Well, okay then.
Just a small personal anecdote…back when my ex and I split, I decided to check out Match.com. I sent out a few messages, and the norm was to not get a reply. One girl, though, replied back with a nice but simple rejection, saying she didn’t think we were compatible.
I was so shocked to have actually gotten a response back, I wrote thanked her for her time, and oh, by the way, I did notice you were a big Joss Whedon fan, did you hear about his new show, Dollhouse?
She had not. If she hadn’t rejected my first letter with a response, I never would have gotten a chance to talk more about our mutual love of Whedon.
We got married this past Sunday. 
All of these types of anecdote are moving me to the conclusion that people are way waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too ready to turn people down whom they might actually get on fine with if they actually gave them half a chance. What’s up with that?
While we’re on this topic (hope I’m not hijacking), how would you word your rejection of someone if you’ve exchanged emails but didn’t send pictures first? After you send pictures, you realize “Oh crap, that is the complete opposite of what I’m looking for. I don’t think I can stomach a meal sitting across the table from someone who looks like that.”
I usually have no problem sending short curt replies if initial contact doesn’t spark my interest. But the thought of having to tell someone “I like everything about you except for the way you look” seems incredibly awkward.
I mean, it’s happened where I send a picture and there’s no reply, so I’m perfectly capable of getting to the conclusion that I don’t meet their physical attractiveness standards. Rejection is awkward as it is, but when it whittles down to being able physical attraction, what the heck do you say about it?
I’m not single anymore, but back when I did online dating I felt the way you did. I preferred being ignored over getting a rejection email.
It was actually a big let down the time that I saw that I had a new message and discovered it was some guy saying he wasn’t interested. I expect when I see a message that it’s something good.
People may say “Thanks for at least responding” to try to save their pride, but I think most people’s feelings are hurt by a rejection. If you don’t get any response, you can tell yourself it’s because they didn’t see your email or something and save your ego a little.
Half the time I didn’t even think about the guys I wrote to and then never heard back from again after the initial email. If someone’s feelings are hurt because they didn’t hear back from one particular person, then that means they aren’t writing to enough people.
