There’s a lot of self righteous petulant fury getting thrown around here, but the issues are a lot more complicated than “fuck that deadbeat!”
To the OP, does the new boyfriend help take care of your daughter’s child? Does your grandchild really need three parents supporting it? Do you have any idea where dad number 1 is, or what he’s doing? Chances are you don’t. Chances are that child support checks help mommies live a two-income lifestyle with only one income, or a three-income lifestyle with only two incomes.
Child support is a terribly broken system that ends up being more punitive than helpful. Children who really do need court help getting support from deadbeat dads get drowned among cases where a kid calls another guy “daddy”, who pays half the rent and buys her diapers while mommy is on the phone screaming because the child support check didn’t arrive this month and she won’t be able to get a bigger television yet.
I haven’t seen a child support case that wasn’t dirty. I’ve seen child support checks go toward a gambling addiction, 100 dollar haircuts, Prada, jewelry, and just about anything else you can think of besides the welfare of a child. In high school, a friend of mine got child support of close to 300 dollars a week for his mother, but he had to get a part time job to pay for stuff like new shoes and clothes, and a bicycle to get to school. What did his mother do with the money? Not sure, but I bet the fucking WATERFALL she had built in their LIVING ROOM had something to do with it. Or maybe the casinos got most of it. I don’t know, but I was at his house when his mother demanded a hundred dollars from him so she could gamble with a relative that was in town.
Another friend of mine (much later. I was in my mid 20s) learned 9 years after he moved away from a small town in the midwest that he had a daughter, and that he owed 50-something thousand dollars in previous child support. The mother had since gotten married, and they had gotten a lawyer to streamline the process of her husband adopting the little girl. They had been together since before the girl was born, but the lawyer informed them that she would lose the right to seek child support if the stepdad adopted the girl. Until then she had apparently not even considered seeking child support, since the girl had two present parents her whole life. Who cares? That’s FIFTY THOUSAND FUCKING DOLLARS we’re talking about here! So now a single guy struggling to survive in a town with low wages and high property values has to pay 30-40% of his checks every month to a little girl who already has a mommy and a daddy in a stable relationship.
I guess what I’m trying to say is get off your high horses, people. You sound like an angry mob, and you either don’t know or refuse to see just how much damage this broken system is doing.